<SPAN name="chap17"></SPAN>
<h3> CHAPTER XVII </h3>
<p>"So the man from Washington told you to bring this to me?"</p>
<p>Roger Seaton asked the question of Manella, twirling in his hand an
unopened letter she had just given him. She nodded in the affirmative.
He looked at her critically, amused at the evident pains she had taken
with her dress and general appearance. He twirled the letter again like
a toy in his fingers.</p>
<p>"I wonder what it's all about? Do you know?"</p>
<p>Manella shrugged her shoulders with a charming air of indifference.</p>
<p>"I? How should I know? He is your friend I suppose?"</p>
<p>"Not a bit of it!" and Roger stretched himself lazily and yawned—"He's
the friend of nobody who is poor. But he's the comrade of everybody
with plenty of cash. He's as hard as a dried old walnut, without the
shred of a heart—"</p>
<p>"You are wrong!" said Manella, flushing up suddenly—"You are wrong and
unjust! He is an ugly old man, but he is very kind."</p>
<p>Seaton threw back his head and laughed heartily with real enjoyment.</p>
<p>"Manella, oh, Manella!" he exclaimed—"What has he said or done to you
to win your good opinion? Has he made you some pretty compliments, and
told you that you are beautiful? Every one can tell you that, my dear!
It does not need Mr. Senator Gwent's assurance to emphasise the fact!
That you find him an ugly old man is natural—but that you should also
think him 'very kind' DOES surprise me!"</p>
<p>Manella gazed at him seriously—her lovely eyes gleaming like jewels
under her long black lashes.</p>
<p>"You mock at everything,"—she said—"It is a pity!"</p>
<p>Her tone was faintly reproachful. He smiled.</p>
<p>"My dear girl, I really cannot regard Mr. Senator Gwent as a figure to
be reverenced!"—he said—"He's one of the dustiest, driest old
dollar-grabbers in the States. I gave him the chance of fresh grab—but
he was too much afraid to take it—"</p>
<p>"Afraid of what?" asked Manella, quickly.</p>
<p>"Of shadows!—shadows of coming events!—yes, they scared him! Now if
you are a good girl, and will sit very quiet, you can come into my hut
out of this scorching sun, and sit down while I read the letter—I may
have to write an answer—and if so you can post it at the Plaza."</p>
<p>He went before her into the hut, and she followed. He bade her sit down
in the chair by the window,—she obeyed, and glanced about her shyly,
yet curiously. The room was not untidy, as she expected it would be
without a woman's hand to set it in order,—on the contrary it was the
perfection of neatness and cleanliness. Her gaze was quickly attracted
by the bowl of perpetually moving fluid in the center of the table.</p>
<p>"What is that?" she asked.</p>
<p>"That? Oh, nothing! An invention of mine—just to look pretty and cool
in warm weather! It reminds me of women's caprices and fancies—always
on the jump! Yes!—don't frown, Manella!—that is so! Now—let me see
what Mr. Sam Gwent has to say that he didn't say before—-" and seating
himself, he opened the letter and began to read.</p>
<p>Manella watched him from under the shadow of her long-fringed
eyelids—her heart beat quickly and uncomfortably. She was fearful lest
Gwent should have broken faith with her after all, and have written of
her and her vain passion, to the man who already knew of it only too
well. She waited patiently for the "god of her idolatry" to look up. At
last he did so. But he seemed to have forgotten her presence. His brows
were knitted in a frown, and he spoke aloud, as to himself—</p>
<p>"A syndicate! Old humbug! He knows perfectly well that the thing could
not be run by a syndicate! It must be a State's own single
possession—a State's special secret. If I were as bent on sheer
destructiveness as he imagines me to be, I should waste no more time,
but offer it to Germany. Germany would take it at once—Germany would
require no persuasion to use it!—Germany would make me a millionaire
twice over for the monopoly of such a force!—that is, if I wanted to
be a millionaire, which I don't. But Gwent's a fool—I must have scared
him out of his wits, or he wouldn't write all this stuff about risks to
my life, advising me to marry quickly and settle down! Good God!
I?—Marry and settle down? What a tame ending to a life's adventure!
Hello, Manella!"</p>
<p>His eyes lighted upon her as if he had only just seen her. He rose from
his chair and went over to where she sat by the window.</p>
<p>"Patient girl!" he said, patting her dark head with his big sun-browned
hand—"As good as gold and quieter than a mouse! Well! You may go now.
I've read the letter and there's no answer. Nothing for me to write, or
for you to post!" She lifted her brilliant eyes to his—what glorious
eyes they were! He would not have been man had he not been conscious of
their amorous fire. He patted her head again in quite a paternal way.</p>
<p>"Nothing for me to write or for you to post"—he repeated,
abstractedly—"and how satisfactory that is!"</p>
<p>"Then you are pleased?" she said.</p>
<p>"Pleased? My dear, there is nothing to be pleased or displeased about!
The ugly old man whom you found so 'very kind' tells me to take care of
myself—which I always do. Also—to marry and settle down—which I
always don't!"</p>
<p>She stood upright, turning her head away from the touch of his hand.
She had never looked more attractive than at that moment,—she wore the
white gown in which he had before admired her, and a cluster of roses
which were pinned to her bodice gave rich contrast to the soft tone of
her smooth, suntanned skin, and swayed lightly with the unquiet heaving
of the beautiful bosom which might have served a sculptor as a perfect
model. A faint, quivering smile was on her lips.</p>
<p>"You always don't? That sounds very droll! You will be unlike every man
in the world, then,—they all marry!"</p>
<p>"Oh, do they? You know all about it? Wise Manella!"</p>
<p>And he looked at her, smiling. Her passionate eyes, full of glowing
ardour, met his,—a flashing fire seemed to leap from them into his own
soul, and for the moment he almost lost his self-possession.</p>
<p>"Wise Manella!" he repeated, his voice shaking a little, while he
fought with the insidious temptation which beset him,—the temptation
to draw her into his arms and take his fill of the love she was so
ready to give—"They always marry? No dear, they do NOT! Many of them
avoid marriage—" he paused, then continued—"and do you know why?"</p>
<p>She shook her head.</p>
<p>"Because it is the end of romance! Because it rings down the curtain on
a beautiful Play! The music ceases—the lights are put out—the
audience goes home,—and the actors take off their fascinating
costumes, wash away their paint and powder and sit down to
supper—possibly fried steak and onions and a pot of beer. The fried
steak and onions—also the beer—make a very good ordinary 'marriage.'"</p>
<p>In this flippant talk he gained the mastery over himself he had feared
to lose—and laughed heartily as he saw Manella's expression of utter
bewilderment.</p>
<p>"I do not understand!" she said, plaintively—"What is steak and
onions?—how do they make a marriage? You say such strange things!"</p>
<p>He laughed again, thoroughly amused.</p>
<p>"Yes, don't I!" he rejoined—"But not half such strange things as I
could say if I were so inclined! I'm a queer fellow!"</p>
<p>He touched her hair gently, putting back a stray curl that had fallen
across her forehead.</p>
<p>"Now, dear," he continued, "It's time you went. You'll be wanted at the
Plaza—and they mustn't think I'm keeping you up here, making love to
you!"</p>
<p>She tossed her head back, and her eyes flashed almost angrily.</p>
<p>"There's no danger of that!" she said, with a little suppressed tremor
in her throat like the sob of a nightingale at the close of its song.</p>
<p>"Isn't there?" and putting his arm round her, he drew her close to
himself and looked full in her eyes—"Manella—there WAS!—a moment
ago!"</p>
<p>She remained still and passive in his arms—hardly daring to breathe,
so rapt was she in a sudden ecstasy, but he could feel the wild beating
of her heart against his own.</p>
<p>"A moment ago!" he repeated, in a half whisper. "A moment ago I could
have made such desperate love to you as would have astonished
myself!—and YOU! And I should have regretted it ever afterwards—and
so would you!"</p>
<p>The struggling emotion in her found utterance.</p>
<p>"No, no—not I!" she said, in quick little passionate murmurs—"I could
not regret it!—If you loved me for an hour it would be the joy of my
life-time!—You might leave me,—you might forget!—but that would not
take away my pride and gladness! You might kill me—I would die gladly
if it saved YOUR life!—ah, you do not understand love—not the love of
Manella!"</p>
<p>And she lifted her face to his—a face so lovely, so young, so warm
with her soul's inward rapture that its glowing beauty might have made
a lover of an anchorite. But with Roger Seaton the impulses of passion
were brief—the momentary flame had gone out in vapour, and the spirit
of the anchorite prevailed. He looked at the dewy red lips, delicately
parted like rose petals—but he did not kiss them, and the clasp of his
arms round her gradually relaxed.</p>
<p>"Hush, hush Manella!" he said, with a mild kindness, which in her
overwrought state was more distracting than angry words would have
been—"Hush! You talk foolishness—beautiful foolishness—all women do
when they set their fancies on men. It is nature, of course,—YOU think
it is love, but, my dear girl, there is no such thing as love!
There!—now you are cross!" for she drew herself quickly away from his
hold and stood apart, her eyes sparkling, her breast heaving, with the
air of a goddess enraged,—"You are cross because I tell you the
truth—-"</p>
<p>"It is not the truth," she said, in a low voice quivering with intense
feeling—"you tell me lies to disguise yourself. But I can see! You
yourself love a woman—but you have not my courage!—you are afraid to
own it! You would give the world to hold her in your arms as you just
now held ME—but you will not admit it—not even to yourself—and you
pretend to hate when you are mad for love!—just as you pretend to be
ill when you are well! You should be ashamed to say there is no such
thing as love! What mean you then by playing so false with
yourself?—with me?—and with HER?"</p>
<p>She looked lovelier than ever in her anger, and he was taken by
surprise at the impetuous and instinctive guess she had made at the
complexity of his moods, which he himself scarcely understood. For a
moment he stood inert, embarrassed by her straight, half-scornful
glance—then he regained his usual mental poise and smiled with
provoking good humour and tolerance.</p>
<p>"Temper, Manella!—temper again! A pity, a pity! Your Spanish blood is
too fiery, Manella!—it is indeed! You have been very rude—do you know
how rude you have been? But there! I forgive you! You are only a
naughty child! As for love—-"</p>
<p>He paused, and going to the door of the hut looked out.</p>
<p>"Manella, there is a big cloud in the west just over the ocean. It is
shaped like a great white eagle and its wings are edged with gold,—it
is the beginning of a fine sunset. Come and look at it,—and while we
watch it floating along I will talk to you about love!"</p>
<p>She hesitated,—her whole spirit was up in arms against this man whom
she loved, and who, so she argued with herself, had allowed her to love
HIM, while having no love for HER; and yet,—since Gwent had told her
that his mysterious occupation might result in disaster and danger to
his life, her devotion had received a new impetus which was wholly
unselfish,—that of watchful guardianship such as inspires a faithful
dog to defend its master. And, moved by this thought, she obeyed his
beckoning hand, and stood with him on the sward outside the hut,
looking at the cloud he described. It was singularly white,—new-fallen
snow could be no whiter,—and, shaped like a huge bird, its great wings
spread out to north and south were edged with a red-gold fire. Seaton
pushed an old tree stump into position and sat down upon it, making
Manella sit beside him.</p>
<p>"Now for this talk!" he said—"Love is the subject,—Love the theme! We
are taught that we must love God and love our neighbor—but we don't,
because we can't! In the case of God we cannot love what we don't know
and don't see,—and we cannot love our neighbor because he is often a
person whom we DO know and CAN see, and who is extremely offensive. Now
let us consider what IS love? You, Manella, are angry because I say
there is no such thing—and you accuse me of indulging in love for a
woman myself. Yet—I still declare, in spite of you, there is no such
thing as love! I ought to be ashamed of myself for saying this—so YOU
think!—but I'm not ashamed. I know I'm right! Love is a divine idea,
never realised. It is like a ninth new note in the musical scale—not
to be attained. It is suggested in the highest forms of poetry and art,
but the suggestion can never be carried out. What men and women call
'love' is the ordinary attraction of sex,—the same attraction that
pulls all male and female living things together and makes them mate.
It is very unromantic! And to a man of my mind, very useless."</p>
<p>She looked at him in a kind of sorrowful perplexity.</p>
<p>"You have much talk"—she said—"and no doubt you are clever. But I
think you are all wrong!"</p>
<p>"You do? Wise child! Now listen to my much talk a little longer! Have
you ever watched silkworms? No? They are typical examples of humanity.
A silkworm, while it is a worm, feeds to repletion,—you can never get
it as many mulberry leaves as it would like to eat—then when it is
gorged, it builds itself a beautiful house of silk (which is taken away
from it in due course) and comes out at the door in wings!—wings it
hardly uses and seems not to understand—then, if it is a female moth,
it looks about for 'love' from the male. If the male 'loves' it, the
female produces a considerable number of eggs like pin-heads—and
then?—what then? Why she promptly dies, and there's an end of her! Her
sole aim and end of being was to produce eggs, which in their turn
become worms and repeat the same dull routine of business. Now—think
me as brutal as you like—I say a woman is very like a female
silkworm,—she comes out of her beautiful silken cocoon of maidenhood
with wings which she doesn't know how to use—she merely flutters about
waiting to be 'loved'—and when this dream she calls 'love' comes to
her, she doesn't dream any longer—she wakes—to find her life
finished!—finished, Manella!—dry as a gourd with all the juice run
out!"</p>
<p>Manella rose from her seat beside him. The warm light in her eyes had
gone—her face was pale, and as she drew herself up to her stately
height she made a picture of noble scorn.</p>
<p>"I am sorry for you!" she said. "If you think these things your
thoughts are quite dreadful! You are a cruel man after all! I am sorry
I spoke of the beautiful little lady who came here to see you—you do
not love her—you cannot!—I felt sure you did—but I am wrong!—there
is no love in you except for yourself and your own will!"</p>
<p>She spoke, breathing quickly, and trembling with suppressed emotion. He
smiled,—and, rising, saluted her with a profound bow.</p>
<p>"Thank you, Manella! You give me a true character!—Myself and my own
will are certainly the chief factors in my life—and they may work
wonders yet!—who knows! And there is no love in me—no!—not what YOU
call love!—but—as concerns the 'beautiful little lady,' you may know
this much of me—THAT <i>I</i> WANT HER!"</p>
<p>He threw out his hands with a gesture that was almost tragic, and such
an expression came into his face of savagery and tenderness commingled
that Manella retreated from him in vague terror.</p>
<p>"I want her!" he repeated—"And why? Not to 'love' her,—but to break
her wings,—for she, unlike a silkworm moth, knows how to use them! I
want her, to make her proud mind bend to MY will and way!—I want her
to show her how a man can, shall, and MUST be master of a woman's brain
and soul!"</p>
<p>A sudden heat of pent-up feeling broke out in this impulsive rush of
words;—he checked himself,—and seeing Manella's pale, scared face he
went up to her and took her hand.</p>
<p>"You see, Manella?" he said, in quiet tones—"There is no such thing as
'love,' but there is such a thing as 'wanting.' And—for the most
selfish reasons man ever had—I want HER—not you!"</p>
<p>The colour rushed back to her cheeks in a warm glow—her great dark
eyes were ablaze with indignation. She drew her hand quickly from his
hold.</p>
<p>"And I hope you will never get her!" she said, passionately—"I will
pray the Holy Virgin to save her from you! For you are wicked! She is
like an angel—and you are a devil!—yes, surely you must be, or you
could not say such horrible things! You do not want me, you say? I know
that! I am a fool to have shown you my heart—you have broken it, but
you do not care—you could have been master of my brain and soul
whenever you pleased—-"</p>
<p>"Ah yes, dear!" he interrupted, with a smile—"That would be so easy!"</p>
<p>The touch of satire in these words was lost on her,—she took them
quite literally, and a sudden softness sweetened her anger.</p>
<p>"Yes!—quite easy!" she said—"And you would be pleased! You would do
as you wished with me—men like to rule women!"</p>
<p>"When it is worth while!" he thought, looking at her with a curious
pitifulness as one might look at a struggling animal caught in a net.
Aloud he said—</p>
<p>"Yes, Manella!—men like to rule women. It is their special
privilege—they have enjoyed it always, even in the days when the
Indian 'braves' beat their squaws out here in California, and killed
them outright if they dared to complain of the beating! Women are busy
just now trying to rule men—it's an experiment, but it won't do! Men
are the masters of life! They expect to be obeyed by all the rest of
creation. <i>I</i> expect to be obeyed!—and so, Manella, when I tell you to
go home, you must go! Yes!—love, tempers and all!—you must go!"</p>
<p>She met his eyes with a resolved look in her own.</p>
<p>"I am going!" she answered—"But I shall come again. Oh, yes! And yet
again! and very often! I shall come even if it is only to find you dead
on this hill—killed by your own secret! Yes—I shall come!"</p>
<p>He gave an involuntary movement of surprise and annoyance. Had Mr.
Senator Gwent discussed his affairs with this beautiful foolish girl
who, like some forest animal, cared for nothing but the satisfaction of
mating where her wishes inclined.</p>
<p>"What do you mean, Manella?" he demanded, imperatively—"Do you expect
to find me dead?"</p>
<p>She nodded vehemently. Tears were in her eyes and she turned her head
away that he might not see them.</p>
<p>"What a cheerful prospect!" he exclaimed, gaily—"And I'm to be killed
by my own secret, am I? I wonder what it is! Ah, Manella, Manella! That
stupid old Gwent has been at you, stuffing your mind with a lot of
nonsense—don't you believe him! I've no 'secret' that will kill me—I
don't want to be killed; No, Manella! Though you come 'again and yet
again and ever so often' as you say, you will not find me dead! I'm too
strong!"</p>
<p>But Manella, yielding to her inward excitement, pointed a hand at him
with a warning air of a tragedy queen.</p>
<p>"Do not boast!" she said—"God is always listening! No man is too
strong for God! I am not clever—I have no knowledge of what you
do—but this I will tell you surely! You may have a secret,—or you may
not have it,—but if you play with the powers of God you will be
punished! Yes!—of that I am quite certain! And this I will also
say—if you were to pull all the clouds down upon you and the thunders
and the lightnings and all the terrible things of destruction in the
world, I would be there! And you would know what love is!—Yes!"—her
voice choked, and then pealed out like that of a Sybilline prophetess,
"If God struck you down to hell, I would be there!"</p>
<p>And with a wild, sobbing cry she rushed away from him down the hill
before he could move or utter a word.</p>
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