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<h2> CHAPTER X </h2>
<p>Benedict XIV—Excursion to Tivoli—Departure of Lucrezia—<br/>
The Marchioness G.—Barbara Dalacqua—My Misfortunes—<br/>
I Leave Rome<br/></p>
<p>M. Dalacqua being very ill, his daughter Barbara gave me my lesson. When
it was over, she seized an opportunity of slipping a letter into my
pocket, and immediately disappeared, so that I had no chance of refusing.
The letter was addressed to me, and expressed feelings of the warmest
gratitude. She only desired me to inform her lover that her father had
spoken to her again, and that most likely he would engage a new servant as
soon as he had recovered from his illness, and she concluded her letter by
assuring me that she never would implicate me in this business.</p>
<p>Her father was compelled to keep his bed for a fortnight, and Barbara
continued to give me my lesson every day. I felt for her an interest
which, from me towards a young and pretty girl, was, indeed, quite a new
sentiment. It was a feeling of pity, and I was proud of being able to help
and comfort her. Her eyes never rested upon mine, her hand never met mine,
I never saw in her toilet the slightest wish to please me. She was very
pretty, and I knew she had a tender, loving nature; but nothing interfered
with the respect and the regard which I was bound in honour and in good
faith to feel towards her, and I was proud to remark that she never
thought me capable of taking advantage of her weakness or of her position.</p>
<p>When the father had recovered he dismissed his servant and engaged
another. Barbara entreated me to inform her friend of the circumstance,
and likewise of her hope to gain the new servant to their interests, at
least sufficiently to secure the possibility of carrying on some
correspondence. I promised to do so, and as a mark of her gratitude she
took my hand to carry it to her lips, but quickly withdrawing it I tried
to kiss her; she turned her face away, blushing deeply. I was much pleased
with her modesty.</p>
<p>Barbara having succeeded in gaining the new servant over, I had nothing
more to do with the intrigue, and I was very glad of it, for I knew my
interference might have brought evil on my own head. Unfortunately, it was
already too late.</p>
<p>I seldom visited Don Gaspar; the study of the French language took up all
my mornings, and it was only in the morning that I could see him; but I
called every evening upon Father Georgi, and, although I went to him only
as one of his 'proteges', it gave me some reputation. I seldom spoke
before his guests, yet I never felt weary, for in his circle his friends
would criticise without slandering, discuss politics without stubbornness,
literature without passion, and I profited by all. After my visit to the
sagacious monk, I used to attend the assembly of the cardinal, my master,
as a matter of duty. Almost every evening, when she happened to see me at
her card-table, the beautiful marchioness would address to me a few
gracious words in French, and I always answered in Italian, not caring to
make her laugh before so many persons. My feelings for her were of a
singular kind. I must leave them to the analysis of the reader. I thought
that woman charming, yet I avoided her; it was not because I was afraid of
falling in love with her; I loved Lucrezia, and I firmly believed that
such an affection was a shield against any other attachment, but it was
because I feared that she might love me or have a passing fancy for me.
Was it self-conceit or modesty, vice or virtue? Perhaps neither one nor
the other.</p>
<p>One evening she desired the Abbe Gama to call me to her; she was standing
near the cardinal, my patron, and the moment I approached her she caused
me a strange feeling of surprise by asking me in Italian a question which
I was far from anticipating:</p>
<p>"How did you like Frascati?"</p>
<p>"Very much, madam; I have never seen such a beautiful place."</p>
<p>"But your company was still more beautiful, and your vis-a-vis was very
smart."</p>
<p>I only bowed low to the marchioness, and a moment after Cardinal Acquaviva
said to me, kindly,</p>
<p>"You are astonished at your adventure being known?"</p>
<p>"No, my lord; but I am surprised that people should talk of it. I could
not have believed Rome to be so much like a small village."</p>
<p>"The longer you live in Rome," said his eminence, "the more you will find
it so. You have not yet presented yourself to kiss the foot of our Holy
Father?"</p>
<p>"Not yet, my lord."</p>
<p>"Then you must do so."</p>
<p>I bowed in compliance to his wishes.</p>
<p>The Abbe Gama told me to present myself to the Pope on the morrow, and he
added,</p>
<p>"Of course you have already shewn yourself in the Marchioness G.'s
palace?"</p>
<p>"No, I have never been there."</p>
<p>"You astonish me; but she often speaks to you!"</p>
<p>"I have no objection to go with you."</p>
<p>"I never visit at her palace."</p>
<p>"Yet she speaks to you likewise."</p>
<p>"Yes, but.... You do not know Rome; go alone; believe me, you ought to
go."</p>
<p>"Will she receive me?"</p>
<p>"You are joking, I suppose. Of course it is out of the question for you to
be announced. You will call when the doors are wide open to everybody. You
will meet there all those who pay homage to her."</p>
<p>"Will she see me?"</p>
<p>"No doubt of it."</p>
<p>On the following day I proceeded to Monte-Cavallo, and I was at once led
into the room where the Pope was alone. I threw myself on my knees and
kissed the holy cross on his most holy slipper. The Pope enquiring who I
was, I told him, and he answered that he knew me, congratulating me upon
my being in the service of so eminent a cardinal. He asked me how I had
succeeded in gaining the cardinal's favour; I answered with a faithful
recital of my adventures from my arrival at Martorano. He laughed heartily
at all I said respecting the poor and worthy bishop, and remarked that,
instead of trying to address him in Tuscan, I could speak in the Venetian
dialect, as he was himself speaking to me in the dialect of Bologna. I
felt quite at my ease with him, and I told him so much news and amused him
so well that the Holy Father kindly said that he would be glad to see me
whenever I presented myself at Monte-Cavallo. I begged his permission to
read all forbidden books, and he granted it with his blessing, saying that
I should have the permission in writing, but he forgot it.</p>
<p>Benedict XIV, was a learned man, very amiable, and fond of a joke. I saw
him for the second time at the Villa Medicis. He called me to him, and
continued his walk, speaking of trifling things. He was then accompanied
by Cardinal Albani and the ambassador from Venice. A man of modest
appearance approached His Holiness, who asked what he required; the man
said a few words in a low voice, and, after listening to him, the Pope
answered, "You are right, place your trust in God;" and he gave him his
blessing. The poor fellow went away very dejected, and the Holy Father
continued his walk.</p>
<p>"This man," I said, "most Holy Father, has not been pleased with the
answer of Your Holiness."</p>
<p>"Why?"</p>
<p>"Because most likely he had already addressed himself to God before he
ventured to apply to you; and when Your Holiness sends him to God again,
he finds himself sent back, as the proverb says, from Herod to Pilate."</p>
<p>The Pope, as well as his two companions, laughed heartily; but I kept a
serious countenance.</p>
<p>"I cannot," continued the Pope, "do any good without God's assistance."</p>
<p>"Very true, Holy Father; but the man is aware that you are God's prime
minister, and it is easy to imagine his trouble now that the minister
sends him again to the master. His only resource is to give money to the
beggars of Rome, who for one 'bajocco' will pray for him. They boast of
their influence before the throne of the Almighty, but as I have faith
only in your credit, I entreat Your Holiness to deliver me of the heat
which inflames my eyes by granting me permission to eat meat."</p>
<p>"Eat meat, my son."</p>
<p>"Holy Father, give me your blessing."</p>
<p>He blessed me, adding that I was not dispensed from fasting.</p>
<p>That very evening, at the cardinal's assembly, I found that the news of my
dialogue with the Pope was already known. Everybody was anxious to speak
to me. I felt flattered, but I was much more delighted at the joy which
Cardinal Acquaviva tried in vain to conceal.</p>
<p>As I wished not to neglect Gama's advice, I presented myself at the
mansion of the beautiful marchioness at the hour at which everyone had
free access to her ladyship. I saw her, I saw the cardinal and a great
many abbes; but I might have supposed myself invisible, for no one
honoured me with a look, and no one spoke to me. I left after having
performed for half an hour the character of a mute. Five or six days
afterwards, the marchioness told me graciously that she had caught a sight
of me in her reception-rooms.</p>
<p>"I was there, it is true, madam; but I had no idea that I had had the
honour to be seen by your ladyship."</p>
<p>"Oh! I see everybody. They tell me that you have wit."</p>
<p>"If it is not a mistake on the part of your informants, your ladyship
gives me very good news."</p>
<p>"Oh! they are excellent judges."</p>
<p>"Then, madam, those persons must have honoured me with their conversation;
otherwise, it is not likely that they would have been able to express such
an opinion."</p>
<p>"No doubt; but let me see you often at my receptions."</p>
<p>Our conversation had been overheard by those who were around; his
excellency the cardinal told me that, when the marchioness addressed
herself particularly to me in French, my duty was to answer her in the
same language, good or bad. The cunning politician Gama took me apart, and
remarked that my repartees were too smart, too cutting, and that, after a
time, I would be sure to displease. I had made considerable progress in
French; I had given up my lessons, and practice was all I required. I was
then in the habit of calling sometimes upon Lucrezia in the morning, and
of visiting in the evening Father Georgi, who was acquainted with the
excursion to Frascati, and had not expressed any dissatisfaction.</p>
<p>Two days after the sort of command laid upon me by the marchioness, I
presented myself at her reception. As soon as she saw me, she favoured me
with a smile which I acknowledged by a deep reverence; that was all. In a
quarter of an hour afterwards I left the mansion. The marchioness was
beautiful, but she was powerful, and I could not make up my mind to crawl
at the feet of power, and, on that head, I felt disgusted with the manners
of the Romans.</p>
<p>One morning towards the end of November the advocate, accompanied by
Angelique's intended, called on me. The latter gave me a pressing
invitation to spend twenty-four hours at Tivoli with the friends I had
entertained at Frascati. I accepted with great pleasure, for I had found
no opportunity of being alone with Lucrezia since the Festival of St.
Ursula. I promised to be at Donna Cecilia's house at day-break with the
same 'is-a-vis'. It was necessary to start very early, because Tivoli is
sixteen miles from Rome, and has so many objects of interest that it
requires many hours to see them all. As I had to sleep out that night, I
craved permission to do so from the cardinal himself, who, hearing with
whom I was going, told me that I was quite right not to lose such an
opportunity of visiting that splendid place in such good society.</p>
<p>The first dawn of day found me with my 'vis-a-vis' and four at the door of
Donna Cecilia, who came with me as before. The charming widow,
notwithstanding her strict morality, was delighted at my love for her
daughter. The family rode in a large phaeton hired by Don Francisco, which
gave room for six persons.</p>
<p>At half-past seven in the morning we made a halt at a small place where
had been prepared, by Don Franciso's orders, an excellent breakfast, which
was intended to replace the dinner, and we all made a hearty meal, as we
were not likely to find time for anything but supper at Tivoli. I wore on
my finger the beautiful ring which Lucrezia had given me. At the back of
the ring I had had a piece of enamel placed, on it was delineated a
saduceus, with one serpent between the letters Alpha and Omega. This ring
was the subject of conversation during breakfast, and Don Francisco, as
well as the advocate, exerted himself in vain to guess the meaning of the
hieroglyphs; much to the amusement of Lucrezia, who understood the
mysterious secret so well. We continued our road, and reached Tivoli at
ten o'clock.</p>
<p>We began by visiting Don Francisco's villa. It was a beautiful little
house, and we spent the following six hours in examining together the
antiquities of Tivoli. Lucrezia having occasion to whisper a few words to
Don Francisco, I seized the opportunity of telling Angelique that after
her marriage I should be happy to spend a few days of the fine season with
her.</p>
<p>"Sir," she answered, "I give you fair notice that the moment I become
mistress in this house you will be the very first person to be excluded."</p>
<p>"I feel greatly obliged to you, signora, for your timely notice."</p>
<p>But the most amusing part of the affair was that I construed Angelique's
wanton insult into a declaration of love. I was astounded. Lucrezia,
remarking the state I was in, touched my arm, enquiring what ailed me. I
told her, and she said at once,</p>
<p>"My darling, my happiness cannot last long; the cruel moment of our
separation is drawing near. When I have gone, pray undertake the task of
compelling her to acknowledge her error. Angelique pities me, be sure to
avenge me."</p>
<p>I have forgotten to mention that at Don Francisco's villa I happened to
praise a very pretty room opening upon the orange-house, and the amiable
host, having heard me, came obligingly to me, and said that it should be
my room that night. Lucrezia feigned not to hear, but it was to her
Ariadne's clue, for, as we were to remain altogether during our visit to
the beauties of Tivoli, we had no chance of a tete-a-tete through the day.</p>
<p>I have said that we devoted six hours to an examination of the antiquities
of Tivoli, but I am bound to confess here that I saw, for my part, very
little of them, and it was only twenty-eight years later that I made a
thorough acquaintance with the beautiful spot.</p>
<p>We returned to the villa towards evening, fatigued and very hungry, but an
hour's rest before supper—a repast which lasted two hours, the most
delicious dishes, the most exquisite wines, and particularly the excellent
wine of Tivoli—restored us so well that everybody wanted nothing
more than a good bed and the freedom to enjoy the bed according to his own
taste.</p>
<p>As everybody objected to sleep alone, Lucrezia said that she would sleep
with Angelique in one of the rooms leading to the orange-house, and
proposed that her husband should share a room with the young abbe, his
brother-in-law, and that Donna Cecilia should take her youngest daughter
with her.</p>
<p>The arrangement met with general approbation, and Don Francisco, taking a
candle, escorted me to my pretty little room adjoining the one in which
the two sisters were to sleep, and, after shewing me how I could lock
myself in, he wished me good night and left me alone.</p>
<p>Angelique had no idea that I was her near neighbour, but Lucrezia and I,
without exchanging a single word on the subject, had perfectly understood
each other.</p>
<p>I watched through the key-hole and saw the two sisters come into their
room, preceded by the polite Don Francisco, who carried a taper, and,
after lighting a night-lamp, bade them good night and retired. Then my two
beauties, their door once locked, sat down on the sofa and completed their
night toilet, which, in that fortunate climate, is similar to the costume
of our first mother. Lucrezia, knowing that I was waiting to come in, told
her sister to lie down on the side towards the window, and the virgin,
having no idea that she was exposing her most secret beauties to my
profane eyes, crossed the room in a state of complete nakedness. Lucrezia
put out the lamp and lay down near her innocent sister.</p>
<p>Happy moments which I can no longer enjoy, but the sweet remembrance of
which death alone can make me lose! I believe I never undressed myself as
quickly as I did that evening.</p>
<p>I open the door and fall into the arms of my Lucrezia, who says to her
sister, "It is my angel, my love; never mind him, and go to sleep."</p>
<p>What a delightful picture I could offer to my readers if it were possible
for me to paint voluptuousness in its most enchanting colours! What
ecstasies of love from the very onset! What delicious raptures succeed
each other until the sweetest fatigue made us give way to the soothing
influence of Morpheus!</p>
<p>The first rays of the sun, piercing through the crevices of the shutters,
wake us out of our refreshing slumbers, and like two valorous knights who
have ceased fighting only to renew the contest with increased ardour, we
lose no time in giving ourselves up to all the intensity of the flame
which consumes us.</p>
<p>"Oh, my beloved Lucrezia! how supremely happy I am! But, my darling, mind
your sister; she might turn round and see us."</p>
<p>"Fear nothing, my life; my sister is kind, she loves me, she pities me; do
you not love me, my dear Angelique? Oh! turn round, see how happy your
sister is, and know what felicity awaits you when you own the sway of
love."</p>
<p>Angelique, a young maiden of seventeen summers, who must have suffered the
torments of Tantalus during the night, and who only wishes for a pretext
to shew that she has forgiven her sister, turns round, and covering her
sister with kisses, confesses that she has not closed her eyes through the
night.</p>
<p>"Then forgive likewise, darling Angelique, forgive him who loves me, and
whom I adore," says Lucrezia.</p>
<p>Unfathomable power of the god who conquers all human beings!</p>
<p>"Angelique hates me," I say, "I dare not...."</p>
<p>"No, I do not hate you!" answers the charming girl.</p>
<p>"Kiss her, dearest," says Lucrezia, pushing me towards her sister, and
pleased to see her in my arms motionless and languid.</p>
<p>But sentiment, still more than love, forbids me to deprive Lucrezia of the
proof of my gratitude, and I turn to her with all the rapture of a
beginner, feeling that my ardour is increased by Angelique's ecstasy, as
for the first time she witnesses the amorous contest. Lucrezia, dying of
enjoyment, entreats me to stop, but, as I do not listen to her prayer, she
tricks me, and the sweet Angelique makes her first sacrifice to the mother
of love. It is thus, very likely, that when the gods inhabited this earth,
the voluptuous Arcadia, in love with the soft and pleasing breath of
Zephyrus, one day opened her arms, and was fecundated.</p>
<p>Lucrezia was astonished and delighted, and covered us both with kisses.
Angelique, as happy as her sister, expired deliciously in my arms for the
third time, and she seconded me with so much loving ardour, that it seemed
to me I was tasting happiness for the first time.</p>
<p>Phoebus had left the nuptial couch, and his rays were already diffusing
light over the universe; and that light, reaching us through the closed
shutters, gave me warning to quit the place; we exchanged the most loving
adieus, I left my two divinities and retired to my own room. A few minutes
afterwards, the cheerful voice of the advocate was heard in the chamber of
the sisters; he was reproaching them for sleeping too long! Then he
knocked at my door, threatening to bring the ladies to me, and went away,
saying that he would send me the hair-dresser.</p>
<p>After many ablutions and a careful toilet, I thought I could skew my face,
and I presented myself coolly in the drawing-room. The two sisters were
there with the other members of our society, and I was delighted with
their rosy cheeks. Lucrezia was frank and gay, and beamed with happiness;
Angelique, as fresh as the morning dew, was more radiant than usual, but
fidgety, and carefully avoided looking me in the face. I saw that my
useless attempts to catch her eyes made her smile, and I remarked to her
mother, rather mischievously, that it was a pity Angelique used paint for
her face. She was duped by this stratagem, and compelled me to pass a
handkerchief over her face, and was then obliged to look at me. I offered
her my apologies, and Don Francisco appeared highly pleased that the
complexion of his intended had met with such triumph.</p>
<p>After breakfast we took a walk through the garden, and, finding myself
alone with Lucrezia, I expostulated tenderly with her for having almost
thrown her sister in my arms.</p>
<p>"Do not reproach me," she said, "when I deserve praise. I have brought
light into the darkness of my charming sister's soul; I have initiated her
in the sweetest of mysteries, and now, instead of pitying me, she must
envy me. Far from having hatred for you, she must love you dearly, and as
I am so unhappy as to have to part from you very soon, my beloved, I leave
her to you; she will replace me."</p>
<p>"Ah, Lucrezia! how can I love her?"</p>
<p>"Is she not a charming girl?"</p>
<p>"No doubt of it; but my adoration for you is a shield against any other
love. Besides Don Francisco must, of course, entirely monopolize her, and
I do not wish to cause coolness between them, or to ruin the peace of
their home. I am certain your sister is not like you, and I would bet
that, even now, she upbraids herself for having given way to the ardour of
her temperament:"</p>
<p>"Most likely; but, dearest, I am sorry to say my husband expects to obtain
judgment in the course of this week, and then the short instants of
happiness will for ever be lost to me."</p>
<p>This was sad news indeed, and to cause a diversion at the breakfast-table
I took much notice of the generous Don Francisco, and promised to compose
a nuptial song for his wedding-day, which had been fixed for the early
part of January.</p>
<p>We returned to Rome, and for the three hours that she was with me in my
vis-a-vis, Lucrezia had no reason to think that my ardour was at all
abated. But when we reached the city I was rather fatigued, and proceeded
at once to the palace.</p>
<p>Lucrezia had guessed rightly; her husband obtained his judgment three or
four days afterwards, and called upon me to announce their departure for
the day after the morrow; he expressed his warm friendship for me, and by
his invitation I spent the two last evenings with Lucrezia, but we were
always surrounded by the family. The day of her departure, wishing to
cause her an agreeable surprise, I left Rome before them and waited for
them at the place where I thought they would put up for the night, but the
advocate, having been detained by several engagements, was detained in
Rome, and they only reached the place next day for dinner. We dined
together, we exchanged a sad, painful farewell, and they continued their
journey while I returned to Rome.</p>
<p>After the departure of this charming woman, I found myself in sort of
solitude very natural to a young man whose heart is not full of hope.</p>
<p>I passed whole days in my room, making extracts from the French letters
written by the cardinal, and his eminence was kind enough to tell me that
my extracts were judiciously made, but that he insisted upon my not
working so hard. The beautiful marchioness was present when he paid me
that compliment.</p>
<p>Since my second visit to her, I had not presented myself at her house; she
was consequently rather cool to me, and, glad of an opportunity of making
me feel her displeasure, she remarked to his eminence that very likely
work was a consolation to me in the great void caused by the departure of
Donna Lucrezia.</p>
<p>"I candidly confess, madam, that I have felt her loss deeply. She was kind
and generous; above all, she was indulgent when I did not call often upon
her. My friendship for her was innocent."</p>
<p>"I have no doubt of it, although your ode was the work of a poet deeply in
love."</p>
<p>"Oh!" said the kindly cardinal, "a poet cannot possibly write without
professing to be in love."</p>
<p>"But," replied the marchioness, "if the poet is really in love, he has no
need of professing a feeling which he possesses."</p>
<p>As she was speaking, the marchioness drew out of her pocket a paper which
she offered to his eminence.</p>
<p>"This is the ode," she said, "it does great honour to the poet, for it is
admitted to be a masterpiece by all the literati in Rome, and Donna
Lucrezia knows it by heart."</p>
<p>The cardinal read it over and returned it, smiling, and remarking that, as
he had no taste for Italian poetry, she must give herself the pleasure of
translating it into French rhyme if she wished him to admire it.</p>
<p>"I only write French prose," answered the marchioness, "and a prose
translation destroys half the beauty of poetry. I am satisfied with
writing occasionally a little Italian poetry without any pretension to
poetical fame."</p>
<p>Those words were accompanied by a very significant glance in my direction.</p>
<p>"I should consider myself fortunate, madam, if I could obtain the
happiness of admiring some of your poetry."</p>
<p>"Here is a sonnet of her ladyship's," said Cardinal S. C.</p>
<p>I took it respectfully, and I prepared to read it, but the amiable
marchioness told me to put it in my pocket and return it to the cardinal
the next day, although she did not think the sonnet worth so much trouble.
"If you should happen to go out in the morning," said Cardinal S. C., "you
could bring it back, and dine with me." Cardinal Aquaviva immediately
answered for me: "He will be sure to go out purposely."</p>
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