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<h2> CHAPTER XX. </h2>
<p>I Demonstrate that Gambling Does Not Pay—I Cause a General<br/>
Stampede—Christmas in the Pine Woods of Alabama—Millions<br/>
of Dollars, but no Christmas Dinner.<br/></p>
<p>When I went away from the party of officers, where we had been playing
draw-poker, with a hundred dollars in my pocket, which I had won from men
who thought they were pretty good poker players, I felt as though I owned
the earth. I had my hand in my pocket, hold of the roll of greenbacks, and
in that way constantly realized that I was no common pauper. I had never
thought that I was an expert at cards, but this triumph convinced me that
there was more money to be made playing poker than in any other way. I
figured up in my mind that if I could win a hundred dollars a night, and
only played five nights a week, I could lay up two thousand dollars a
month. To keep it up a year would make me rich, and if the war lasted a
couple of years I could go home with money enough to buy out the best
newspaper in Wisconsin. It is wonderful what a train of thought a young
man's first success in gambling, or speculation, brings to him. I went to
bed with my hundred dollars buttoned inside my flannel shirt, and dreamed
all night about holding four aces, full hands, and three of a kind. All
that night, in my sleep, I never failed to “fill” when I drew to a hand. I
made up my mind to break every officer in the regiment, at poker, and then
turn my attention to other regiments, and win all the money the paymaster
should bring to the brigade. I got up in the morning with a headache, and
thought how long it would be before night, when we could play poker again,
and I wondered why we couldn't play during the day, as there was nothing
else going on. It got rumored around the regiment that I had cleaned the
officers out at poker the night before, and the boys seemed glad that a
private had made them pay attention. I had not yet got my commsssion, and
so any victory I might achieve was considered a victory for a private
soldier. Several of the boys congratulated me. The nearest I ever come to
quarreling with my old partner, Jim, was over this poker business. I
showed him my roll, and told him how I had cleaned the officers out, and
instead of feeling good over it, Jim said I was a confounded fool. I tried
to argue the matter with Jim, but he couldn't be convinced, and insisted
that they had made a fool of me, and had let me win on purpose, and that
they would win it all back, and all I had besides. He said I had better
let the chaplain take the hundred dollars to keep for me, and stay away
from that poker game, and I would be a hundred ahead, but I didn't want
any second-class chaplain to be a guardian over me, and I told Jim I was
of age, and could take care of myself. Jim said he thought I had some
sense before I was commsssioned, but it had spoiled me. He said in less
than a week I would be borrowing money of him. I knew better, and went
around camp with my thumbs stuck in my armholes, and felt big. It was an
awful long day, but I put in the time thinking how I would draw cards, and
bet judiciously, and finally night came, and I went over to the major's
tent, where the officers usually congregated. I was early, and had to wait
half an hour before the crowd showed up. As they came in each had
something to say to me. “Here's the man who walked off with our wealth
last night,” said one. “Here's our victim,” said another. “We will send
him to his tent tonight without a dollar.” They chaffed me a good deal,
but I made up my mind that I could play as well as they could, and some of
them were old fellows that had played poker before I was born. Well, we
went to work, and the first hand I got I lost ten dollars. It was the
history of all smart Aleck's, and there is no use of going into details.
In less than an hour they had won the hundred dollars, and fifty that I
had sewed inside my shirt to keep for a rainy day, and they had joked me
every time I bet until I was exasperated to such an extent that I could
have killed them. Winning or losing money with them was a mere pastime,
and they seemed to enjoy losing about as much as winning. I was too proud,
or too big a fool to leave the game when I had lost all I had, and I
borrowed a little of each of them, and lost it, and then I said I was
tired and I guessed I would go to bed, and I went out, dizzy and sick at
heart, and the officers laughed so I could hear them clear to my tent. On
the way to my tent, and as I walked around for half an hour before going
there, I thought over what a fool I was, how I had forgotten all the good
advice ever given me by my friends. Knowing that I was not intended by
nature for a gambler, I had gone in with my eyes open, made a temporary
success, got the big head, as all boys do, and gone back and laid down my
bundle, and become the laughing stock of the whole crowd. I figured up
that I was just an even hundred dollars out of pocket, and decided that I
would never try to get it back. I would simply swear off gambling right
there, forget that I knew one card from another, pay up my gambling debts
when I got my first pay, and never touch a card again.</p>
<p>That was the wisest conclusion that I ever come to. After I had walked
around until my head cleared off a little, I went in the tent sly and
still, to go to bed without letting Jim hear me. I was ashamed, and didn't
want to talk. I heard Jim roll over on his bunk, and he said:</p>
<p>“Bet ten dollars, pard, that you lost all you had.”</p>
<p>“Jim, I won't bet with you. I have sworn off betting intirely.”</p>
<p>“Help yourself,” said Jim, as he reached over his greasy old pocketbook to
me. “Take all you want, now that you have come to your senses. But you
must admit that what I said about your being a fool, was true.”</p>
<p>“Yes, and an idiot, and an ass,” I said, as I handed back Jim's money.
“But that settles it. I will never gamble another cent's worth as long as
I live, and if I see a friend of mine gambling, I will try and break him
of the habit. There is nothing in it, and I went to sleep, and didn't
dream any more about winning all the money in camp.”</p>
<p>Two days before Christmas our cavalry, consisting of a full brigade,
started on a raid, or a march through the enemy's country, and as I could
not act as an officer very well, before my commission arrived, and as the
colonel seemed to hate to see me in the ranks when I was looked upon as an
officer, he sent me to brigade headquarters on a detail to carry the
brigade colors. The brigade colors consisted of a blue guidon, on a pole.
The butt end of the pole, or staff, was inserted in a socket of leather
fastened to my stirrup, and I held on to the staff with my right hand when
on the march, guiding my horse with my left hand, When the command halted
the colors were planted in the ground in front of the place which the
brigade commander had selected. On the march I rode right behind the
brigade commander and his staff, with the body guard to protect the
precious colors. I was glad of this position, because it took me among
high officials, and if there was anything I doted, on it was high
officers. The colonel had told me that I must be on my good behavior, and
salute the officers of the staff, whenever they came near me. He said the
brigade commander was a strict disciplinarian, and wouldn't put up with
any monkey business. The first hour of my service as color bearer came
near breaking up the brigade. I was perhaps forty feet behind the brigade
commander and his staff, riding as stiff as though I was a part of the
horse, and feeling as proud as though I owned the army. Suddenly the
colonel and staff turned out of the road, and faced to the rear, and
started to ride back to one of the regiments in the rear. I saw them
coming, and felt that I must salute them. How to do it was a puzzle to me.
If I saluted with my left hand, it would be wrong, besides I would have to
drop the reins, and my horse might start to run, as he was prancing and
putting on as much style as I was. If I saluted with my right hand, I
should have to let go the flag staff. The salute must be sudden, so I
could grasp the staff very quick, before it toppled over. It took a great
head to decide what to do, and I had to decide quick. Just as the brigade
commander got opposite me I let go the flag stair, brought my right hand
quickly to the right eye, as nice a salute as a man ever saw, and returned
it to grab the flag stall. But it was too late. As soon as my right hand
let go of the staff, it fell over and the gilt dart on the end of the
staff struck the general's horse in the flank, he jumped sideways against
the adjutant-general's horse, and his horse fell over the brigade
surgeon's horse, the general's horse run under a tree, and brushed the
general off, and the whole staff was wild trying to hold their horses, and
jumping to catch the general's horse, and pick the general off the ground.
In the meantime my horse had got frightened at the staff and flag that was
dragging on the ground, with one end in the socket in the stirrup, the
pole tickling him in the ribs, and he began to dance around, and whirl,
and knock members of the color-guard off their horses, and they stampeded
to the woods leaving me in the road, on a frightened horse, whirliing
around, unmanageable, the start striking trees and horses, until the staff
was broken.</p>
<p>The regiment in the rear of us saw the commotion, saw the general
dismounted, and the colors on the ground, and a general stampede in front,
and, thinking the general and staff had been ambushed by the rebels, and
many killed, the colonel ordered his men forward on a charge, and, in less
time than it takes to write it, the woods were full of charging soldiers,
looking for an imaginary enemy, a surgeon had opened up a lot of remedies,
and all was confusion, and I was the innocent cause of it all. I had seen
my mistake as soon as the flag staff knocked the general off his horse,
and when I dismounted and picked up the flag, and the pieces of the staff,
and found myself surrounded by excited troops, I wondered if the general
would pull his revolver and shoot me himself, or order some of the
soldiers to kill me. For choice I had rather have been killed by a volley
from a platoon of soldiers, but I recognized the fact that the general had
a perfect right to kill me. In fact I wanted him to shoot me. I was
trimming the limbs off a sapling for a makeshift flag staff, when I saw
the crowd open, and the general walked towards me. His face was a trifle
pale, except where the red clay from the road covered it, and I felt that
the next moment or two would decide in what manner I was to meet my doom.
I remembered what the colonel had told me, about the general being a
strict disciplinarian, and wondered if it wouldn't help matters if I
should fall on my knees and say a little prayer, or ask him to spare my
life. I wondered if I would be justified in drawing my revolver and trying
to get the drop on the general. But I had no time to think it over, for he
come right up to me, and said:</p>
<p>“I beg your pardon, my young friend, for the trouble and annoyance I have
caused you. I should have known better than to ride so near you, and
frighten your horse, when you had only one hand to guide the animal. Are
you hurt? No; well, I am very glad. Ah, the flag staff is broken! Let me
help you tack the flag on the sapling. Orderly, bring me some nails. Let
me whittle the bark off the sapling, so it will not hurt your hands. When
we get into camp tonight, and the wagons come up, I will see that you have
another staff. There, don't feel bad about it. There is no damage.”</p>
<p>Bless his soul! I could, have hugged him for his kindness. When he came
towards me, I was mad and desperate, and when he spoke kind words to me,
my chin trembled, and I felt like a baby. He stopped the brigade for half
an hour, to help fix up my flag, and all the time talked so kindly to me,
that when the thing was fixed, I felt remorse of conscience, and said:
“General, I am entirely to blame myself. I tried to perform the impossible
feat of saluting you and holding the colors at the same time, which I am
satisfied now cannot be done successfully. Lay it all to me.”</p>
<p>“I knew it,” said the good old general, “and I was going to tell you that
you are not expected to salute anybody when you have the colors. You are a
part of the flag, then. You will learn it all by and by,” and he mounted
his horse and rode away about his business, as cool as though nothing had
happened, and left me feeling that he was the best man on earth. Further
acquaintance with the old man taught me that he was one of nature's
noblemen. He was an Illinois farmer, who had enlisted as a private, and
had in time become colonel of his regiment, and had been placed in command
of this brigade. Every evening he would take an axe and cut up fire-wood
enough for headquarters, and he was not above cleaning off his horse if
his servant was sick, or did not do it to suit, and frequently I have seen
him greasing his own boots.</p>
<p>Two days out, and we were in the pine woods of Alabama, with no habitation
within ten miles. After a day's march we went into camp in the woods, and
it was the afternoon before Christmas. The young pines, growing among the
larger ones, were just such little trees as were used at home for
Christmas trees, and within an hour after getting the camp made, every man
thought of Christmas at home. The boys went off into the woods and got
holly, and mistletoe, and every pup tent of the whole brigade was
decorated, and they hung nose bags, grain sacks, army socks and pants on
the trees. Around the fires stakes had been driven to hang clothes on to
dry, and as night came and the pitch pine fires blazed up to the tops of
the great pines, it actually looked like Christmas, though there was not a
Christmas present anywhere. After supper the brigade band began to play
patriotic airs, with occasionally an old fashioned tune, like “Old
Hundred,” the woods rung with music from the boys who could sing, and
everybody was as happy as I ever saw a crowd of people, and when it came
time to retire the band played “Home, Sweet Home,” and three thousand
rough soldiers went to bed with tears in their eyes, and every man dreamed
of the dear ones at home, and many prayed that the home ones might be
happy, and in the morning they all got up, stripped the empty Christmas
stockings off the evergreen trees, put them on, and went on down the red
road, and at noon the army entered Montgomery, Alabama, the first capital
of the confederate states, took possession of the capital building in
which were millions of dollars of confederate money and bonds. Every
soldier filled his pockets and saddle bags with bonds and bills of large
denominations. It was a poor soldier that could not count up his half a
million dollars, but with all the money no man could buy a Christmas
dinner. A dollar in greenbacks would buy more than all of the wagon loads
of confederate currency captured that day. And yet the people of
Montgomery looked upon the arrival of the Yankees much as they would the
arrival of a pestilence. However, it was not many days before a better
understanding was arrived at, and Yankee blue and Confederate gray got
mixed up, and acquaintances were made that ripened into mutual respect and
in some cases love.</p>
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