Coo-ee Reciter

<h2 id="AN_ALL-AROUND_INTELLECTUAL_MAN"><i>AN ALL-AROUND INTELLECTUAL MAN.</i></h2> <div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> <span class="i0">He was up in mathematics, had a taste for hydrostatics, and could talk about astronomy from Aristarchus down;<br/></span> <span class="i0">He could tell what kind of beans were devoured by the Chaldeans, and he knew the date of every joke made by a circus clown.<br/></span></div> <div class="stanza"> <span class="i0">He was versed in evolution, and would instance the poor Russian as a type of despotism in the modern age of man.<br/></span> <span class="i0">He could write a page of matter on the different kinds of batter used in making flinty gim-cracks on the modern cooking plan.<br/></span></div> <div class="stanza"> <span class="i0">He could revel in statistics, he was well up in the fistics, knew the pedigree of horses dating 'way back from the ark.<br/></span> <span class="i0">Far and wide his tips were quoted, and his base-ball stuff was noted. In political predictions he would always hit the mark.<br/></span></div> <div class="stanza"> <span class="i0">He could write upon the tariff, and he didn't seem to care if he was called off to review a book or write a poem or two:<br/></span> <span class="i0">He could boil down stuff and edit, knew the value of a credit, and could hustle with the telegraph in a style excelled by few.<span class="pagenum">[115]</span><br/></span> <span class="i0">He could tell just how a fire should be handled; as a liar he was sure to exercise a wise, discriminative taste.<br/></span> <span class="i0">He was mild and yet undaunted, and no matter what was wanted he was always sure to get it first, yet never was in haste.<br/></span></div> <div class="stanza"> <span class="i0">But despite his reputation as a brainy aggregation, he was known to be deficient in a manner to provoke.<br/></span> <span class="i0">For no matter when you met him he would borrow if you let him, and he seemed to have the faculty of always being broke.<br/></span></div> <div class="stanza"> <span class="i0"><span class="smcap">Tom Masson.</span><br/></span></div> </div> <hr class="chap" /> <div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />