<h2>22</h2>
<p>When he had pulled the scaled skin of the fish away from the
flesh, the flesh away from the bones, and eaten his fill, Cal lay
back on the rock again, to doze, to continue his search for a means
of communicating.</p>
<p>He was now sharply aware of Their presence, of Their urgency,
of Their long patience. Awareness! Once man had got over his
greedy delight in occupying more and more of the universe simply
because he could, to protect himself against the cosmic loneliness
that must follow, he too would be searching for awareness.</p>
<p>But he would define it in his own terms, and pass it by if it
did not meet those terms.</p>
<p>That there was some other intelligence which had found man
instead, Cal did not doubt. The experiment of Eden, the
manipulation of natural laws, the denial of physical tools—for what
purpose? To clear away the debris which prevented communication
of awareness as They defined it?</p>
<p>There was a trace, a minor trace of awareness in man not
dependent upon the tools and artifacts of physical science—extra-sensory
perception, psi. Underdeveloped, because with physical
tools its development had been made unnecessary? Because having
found the answers with physical tools, man stopped looking
for answers other than these?<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>Was there, then, a science of controlling things, forces, without
the use of physical tools? Was there a road of transition from the
crude manipulation of things and forces through tools to a
manipulation without them? There was precedent in man's science.
The elaborate wirings of the first bulky and crude electronic sets,
that gave way to a printed diagram of such wirings on a card
to obtain the same result?</p>
<p>A step farther? The visual picture, the mental image of the
diagram to obtain the same result? But how?</p>
<p>To one whose total orientation is through the use of physical
tools (for the material printed on the card diagram was the
physical carrier of the current) how to cause the current to follow
the mental image of that diagram? With voice and music bathing
one's senses simply because one thought of the diagram of a receiver?
How?</p>
<p>He felt like the turkey come up against the obstruction of a
fence too low to justify the effort of flying over it. Instead of flying,
he was walking around and around, looking for an opening, walking
in an endless circle.</p>
<p>Circle?</p>
<p>Excitedly, he climbed down from the rock and headed for a
patch of bare sand at the river's edge.</p>
<p>In every framework of thought which man had ever devised,
the circle was prominent, vital. It played its part in every creed
of every race, of every time. It was as essential to the ancient arts
of magic as to the current methods of science. It played its part
in the movement of planets, the shape of stars, perhaps the essence
of the total universe.</p>
<p>Man might be too didactic in requiring that awareness develop
a physical science comparable to his own, but surely awareness,
whatever form it took, would know the circle.</p>
<p>He sank down on his haunches beside the smooth sand, and
with the tip of his finger he quickly drew a circle.</p>
<p>The furrow, scratched in the sand, did not close or smooth out!</p>
<p>He sat back and waited. Nothing happened. It was almost as<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</SPAN></span>
if the invisible intelligence were saying, "All right. You are aware
of a circle. That was obvious to us from your artifacts. What else
do you know?"</p>
<p>He leaned forward, and as nearly as he could estimate, he
dotted the center of the circle with a finger, then scratched a
radius to the perimeter. It stayed. To one side he drew another
line, approximating the radius and in parenthesis he drew a small
2. Beside this he wrote R². He drew an equals sign. He scratched
the pi sign.</p>
<p>Then he drew another circle and with the palm of his hand
he smoothed all its interior. That should be plain enough. The
symbols stayed. They understood his mathematics, then. The
equation seemed undisturbed, yet there was something wrong
with it. He had to look closely at the sand before he saw what
it was.</p>
<p>The = had changed to : !</p>
<p>Why had they changed the meaning by substituting "proportionate
to" for "equals"? He felt a flash of exasperation. Well sure,
without tools he could not draw a perfect circle, nor two of them
entirely equal. It was pedantic of them to split hairs over that?
He must practice, without tools, to draw a perfect circle?</p>
<p>Or was that running around inside his low fence?</p>
<p>He looked down at the sand, and saw the entire scratching was
now smoothed out. Apparently he was on the wrong track. Hadn't
got what they meant.</p>
<p>He wrote again in the sand: "pi = 3.14159265...."</p>
<p>Again = changed to : .</p>
<p>Again he felt his flash of exasperation. It must be obvious by
his string of dots that he knew pi had never been exactly resolved.
They were being too pedantic. He must exactly resolve it? Yet
the numbers could be continued to infinity and never exactly resolved.
He looked down again, and the equation was gone.</p>
<p>Wrong track again.</p>
<p>He sat forward, hugged his knees, and stared into the water.</p>
<p>The equation had never been exactly resolved, yet man used<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</SPAN></span>
it as a constant, an absolute. An obvious fallacy. Was the difference
between physical science and psi science based in this
insignificant difference in exactness? Try something else. See
what happens. There was an equation which had proved its effectiveness,
upon which the whole science of atomics was based.</p>
<p>"E = MC²," he wrote.</p>
<p>Again = changed to : .</p>
<p>What were they saying? That the fallacy lay in using the equals
sign? That the science of psi was one of proportion. But equals
was one of the possible proportions. Had we become walled in
our low fence because we were too dependent upon the exact
balance? Been satisfied to find that answer, and therefore stopped
looking for the possibilities inherent in unbalanced equations?</p>
<p>He looked down at the symbols again half expecting to see
them erased. But they were still there. So he was starting on the
right track. But wait.</p>
<p>Before his eyes he saw the C² smooth out, disappear. Only
"E : M" remained. Were they saying that dependence upon
constants was the low fence? That man must learn to do without
his firm absolutes? That was the ultimate in relativity: Energy is
proportionate to matter. But so all-inclusive as to be too vague
for use.</p>
<p>For more than three centuries now, controversy had raged over
Einstein's use of C² in his expression. Some held that it was a
product of his time, that he was able to make only one step beyond
classical physics where all things must be related to a fixed value.
Others held that its inclusion was a deliberate fallacy; that
Einstein, by his other work, had shown he knew it was a fallacy;
that, tongue in cheek, he inserted it into his equation in full
knowledge that his fellow scientists of his day could not even bear
to think of the awesome concept of things without orientation
to an absolute; that he knew they would reject him entirely, refuse
even to consider his thought unless he catered that much to
their superstitions.</p>
<p>The need of the absolute was not mathematical or scientific,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</SPAN></span>
but emotional. Man was still tortured by his determination to be
the center of things, himself the fixed absolute! The need of a
familiar, fixed cave where he might run and hide, close himself
in securely when the chaos of storm outside became too frightening
to bear. The need of a fixed absolute, whether in philosophy
or science, a fixed spot that would not shift.</p>
<p>The science of psi, then, was based in a willingness to shift?</p>
<p>He looked down at the equation, to see if he were still on the
track.</p>
<p>It had changed again. Now it read "EδM": The form of the
function of energy to matter is variable.</p>
<p>Quickly, another change. "Df(em)": The form of the function
and the independent variable of the function vary together.</p>
<p>Still another: "E = f(M)": There is a general relationship of
energy to matter.</p>
<p>And then: "F(e,m) = 0": There is a general unspecified relationship
between energy and matter.</p>
<p>He slapped his hand down on the sand in frustration.</p>
<p>"All right," he said. "You've made your point. And it means
about as much as if I said to the turkey, 'All you have to do is
fly'."</p>
<p>There was a stir behind him. He turned his head and saw
Louie. A deep sigh, almost a sob came from Louie as he stared
down at the symbols in the sand.</p>
<p>"They talked to <i>you</i>," Louie said brokenly. "I wanted only to
serve Them, but it was to <i>you</i> They talked."</p>
<p>And all the tragedy of his life was contained therein.</p>
<p>Cal sprang to his feet, and put his arms around the other man's
shoulders. The two of them, the bitter and the sympathetic, looked
down at the sand. The symbols were still changing, and now read
"There is an infinity of relationships between matter and energy,
an infinity of forms to be taken by matter as you control the energy."</p>
<p>The signs were wiped out, and the sense of Their presence was
gone. Cal felt the withdrawal, the sense of a lesson being over.<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]</SPAN></span>
He did not regret it, he had enough to think about. But first,
there was Louie, racked with broken sobbing.</p>
<p>Here was a man whose life had been a search for certainties,
absolutes that would not shift under the weight of his questioning.
No doubt in his youth he had turned to the religions of the day—and
found them a tissue of rationalizations without contact in
reality. Then to science—and found it, too, constantly shifting in
its interpretations, making new evaluations as evidence discounted
the old. The shock of landing on Eden to drive him back into
childhood interpretations again—at last, the clear evidence that
had been denied his belief in youth.</p>
<p>Wholehearted in his belief of Them, yet it was not to him They
had talked.</p>
<p>"Louie," Cal said slowly. "If you were lonely, very lonely, if
you had searched through the years for companionship, and
thought you might have found it, would it please you to have
that companion drop to his knees, grovel before you? Would this
be your idea of companionship?</p>
<p>"What manner of monstrous egotism would require that? What
but the incredible vanity of primitive man, to whom life meant
nothing more than conquering or being conquered, could imagine
such conduct would be pleasing to another intelligence?</p>
<p>"We are men, Louie. If, in our loneliness, we found another
intelligence, wouldn't we want an equal exchange instead of
abasement? The use of that intelligence to know, to understand,
instead of a denial of it?"</p>
<p>Louie twisted out of Cal's embracing arm, and ran stumbling
toward the depths of the forest.</p>
<hr /><p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[150]</SPAN></span></p>
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