<h2>HOUSE-PARTIES</h2>
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<p class="drop-capi">THE HOUSE-PARTY is
made up of any number of
guests, from half a dozen to
a score, and may be merely
for a few days or for any
desired length of time. But, whatever is to
be the length of the guest’s stay, it should
be specifically stated in the invitation. It
is a common saying that an invitation that
sets no time for the visit is no invitation
at all, and the saying is quite true.</p>
<p>So, in writing her invitation, a hostess
mentions the exact day for the guest’s
arrival, and, as well, the exact day of departure.
The invitation is always a note
written in the first person. The following
may serve as an illustration:</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</SPAN></span></p>
<div class="blockquot">
<p class="right">
<i>The Oaks, Hyde Park.<br/>
<span style="margin-right: 2em;">April 10, 1919.</span></i><br/></p>
<i>Dear Mrs. Ashland:</i>
<p><i>I should be delighted to have you
come to us for the next week-end, and I
hope that there is no previous engagement
to prevent your giving us this
pleasure.</i></p>
<p><i>The best train for you to take
from the city is the one leaving at three
in the afternoon. Mr. Lawrence will
meet this at the station here on Friday.</i></p>
<p><i>In eager anticipation of your visit,
believe me,</i></p>
<p class="sig">
<i><span style="margin-right: 2em;">Cordially yours,</span><br/>
Ella Lawrence</i><br/></p>
</div>
<p>The guest’s answer to the invitation must
be of the promptest, whether it accepts or
rejects the proposal of a visit. It should,
of course, be written in the first person.
The wording is a matter for the individual
taste, and the form following is offered
merely as a suggestion.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]</SPAN></span></p>
<div class="blockquot">
<div class="right">
<i><span style="margin-right: 1em;">47 Tremont St.,</span><br/>
New York.</i><br/>
<i><span style="margin-right: 1em;">April 11, 1919.</span></i><br/></div>
<i>Dear Mrs. Lawrence:</i>
<p><i>I am more pleased than I can tell
you to receive your kind invitation, since
there is nothing to prevent my acceptance
of it. I shall take the three o’clock train
on Friday afternoon for Hyde Park,
and I am looking forward very eagerly
to being with you so soon.</i></p>
<p class="sig">
<i><span style="margin-right: 2em;">Yours sincerely,</span><br/>
Roberta Ashland</i><br/></p>
</div>
<p>The declination of the invitation should
contain some fitting expression of regret,
and an explanation as to the causes that
render an acceptance impossible.</p>
<p>It is imperative that a girl should be met
at the station by her host in person, or, if
convenient, preferably by the hostess, or
perhaps by both. But this attention is
not obligatory in the case of a married<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[78]</SPAN></span>
couple or with a bachelor guest. But
these, too, should be met at the station
by a servant if not by the host, and duly
conveyed to the house where they are to
be entertained.</p>
<p>The guest on arrival should be welcomed
at the entrance by the hostess, if she has
not been to the station, and after the
greetings she escorts the guest, if this is a
woman, to the chamber she is to occupy,
and there leaves her to freshen herself
after the journey.</p>
<p>When the luggage is brought in, a competent
maid will unpack it and distribute
the contents through the drawers of the
bureau and in the closet, and render such
other services as may be required. A less
competent maid can at least unstrap the
luggage, remove trays, and help in the disposal
of the contents.</p>
<p>In the case of a man, after being greeted
by his hostess, he is conducted to his
room by the host.</p>
<p>The wardrobe requirements for the visitor<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[79]</SPAN></span>
at a house-party are regulated by the probable
nature of the entertainment that will
be provided, by the season of the year, and
by the particular social status of the hosts.
No hard-and-fast rule can be given. Thus,
where a woman visits a country house for
a few days in the summer, she needs no
larger wardrobe than can be carried in the
tiniest of trunks, suitcase and hat-box.
The hat used for traveling will serve her
also on occasion during the visit, but she
will need in addition a sport-hat for tramping
or out-door games and another hat of
sufficient elegance for wear at a lawn party
or wherever more elaborate dress is necessary.
The frocks should follow the lines
thus indicated, and there should be a sufficiency
of dainty waists and footgear besides
the inevitable decolleté gowns for
evening wear.</p>
<p>For the man, also, evening clothes are
essential, and he should be provided
with flannels, besides the business suit in
which he travels. For winter, the change<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</SPAN></span>
in season would demand a corresponding
change in the matter of dress, especially
for out of doors.</p>
<p>The hostess plans sufficient entertainment
for her guests, but, if she is discreet,
she does not plan too many things. It is
customary to leave the mornings to the
devices of the guests, to be occupied by
them according to their individual pleasure.
Where a morning start is required on some
expedition, such as a picnic, the hostess is
likely to leave the evening free from any
special entertainment.</p>
<p>It is the duty of the guest to conform to
the habits of the household. If the party
assembles together for breakfast, he or she
must make one of the number though the
hour may be too early or too late for personal
convenience. Likewise, the guest
should accept such disposal of his or her
time as the hostess may choose to make,
even when the preference would be quite
otherwise. The tactful hostess, of course,
studies the likes and dislikes of her guests,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</SPAN></span>
and seeks to reconcile her hospitality so
far as possible to their prejudices.</p>
<p>It is customary to give tips on leaving a
house-party to those servants with whom
the guest has been brought more closely
in contact. The maid who has attended to
the room should receive a dollar from the
visitor for a few days; the butler, if there
is one, should receive a dollar and a half.
The amount for the chauffeur should be
regulated to some extent by his personal
service in the guest’s behalf. Where there
has been none, a dollar is sufficient.</p>
<p>These figures are applicable in the cases
of unmarried women and bachelors, although
the tendency of the latter is to
give more. The sums named, however, are
regarded as acceptable by the servants
themselves. Naturally, they enjoy the
lavish, even prodigal tips given by certain
persons of wealth, who are more ostentatious
than discreet. Such indiscretions,
however, need not set up a false standard
for other guests.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>In the case of a husband and wife, the
tips to maid and butler, etc., should be
increased. It is usual for the wife to tip
the female servants, while the husband
satisfies those of his own sex. When the
care of the guest’s shoes devolves on a
house-boy, he, too, should be remembered
with a half-dollar.</p>
<p>The male guests frequently give a tip
of a dollar or more to the cook.</p>
<p>It is the duty of the hostess in the case of
a woman visitor to bid her farewell in person,
even if this should necessitate arising
at an unpleasantly early hour. But in the
case of a man’s leaving thus early, it suffices
if she makes her farewell the night
before. It then becomes the duty of the
host to attend on the guest for the breakfast
and departure.</p>
<p>In about a week after such a visit, the
guest should write a note to the hostess,
expressing warm appreciation of the hospitality
thus enjoyed. It is also permissible
for the guest to send a gift that is not<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]</SPAN></span>
too costly, such as a book, or any simple
thing that may serve as a token of remembrance.
But this is in no wise obligatory,
and, in fact, good taste is likely to prevent
the bestowal of such a gift in most cases.
There could hardly be anything less satisfactory
to a hostess than a string of such
souvenirs from her whilom guests.</p>
<p>Where the visit is a very short one, less
than two days, it is customary to dispense
with the bread-and-butter letter.</p>
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<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[84]</SPAN></span></p>
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