<h2>WEDDINGS</h2>
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<p class="drop-capi">THE WEDDING-INVITATIONS
are sent out fully
two weeks before the marriage,
at least, and they
may be sent earlier, up to
a limit of two months.</p>
<p>The invitation is engraved on white
paper, of which there is a double sheet.
The invitation itself must occupy only the
first page. An average size is between
seven and eight inches in length and about
an inch less in width. Script is usually
preferred. The invitation is folded once
and placed in an unsealed envelope with
the guest’s name written on it. Another
envelope is used to contain this, on which
are written both the name and address,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[142]</SPAN></span>
and it is sealed for delivery by post or
messenger.</p>
<p>It should be borne in mind that, while
husband and wife are joined in a single
invitation, other members of the family
must be separately invited, except that
more than one daughter may be included
under the designation <i>The Misses ....................</i>,
and similarly more than one son, <i>The
Messrs. ....................</i>. Otherwise, a daughter
receives an individual invitation, as
does also a son.</p>
<p>In cities, on the occasion of church weddings
where strangers often intrude, it is
common to inclose with the invitation a
small card inscribed:</p>
<p class="center">
<i>Please present this card at<br/>
<br/>
the Church of the Incarnation<br/>
<br/>
on Tuesday, June the first</i><br/></p>
<p>A standard form for the wording of the
invitation is as follows:</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</SPAN></span></p>
<p class="center">
<i>Mr. and Mrs. Henry L. Hudson<br/>
<br/>
request the honor of your presence<br/>
<br/>
at the marriage of their daughter<br/>
<br/>
Harriet<br/>
<br/>
to<br/>
<br/>
Mr. James Meade Trowbridge<br/>
<br/>
on Tuesday afternoon, June the first<br/>
<br/>
at half-past three o’clock<br/>
<br/>
The Church of the Incarnation<br/>
<br/>
Baltimore</i><br/></p>
<p>The invitations are issued in the names
of the bride’s parents, or, lacking them,
in the name of her nearest relative, unless
this should be an unmarried sister. When
the invitations are issued by a brother,
his name only may be used, even though
he is married. But where the relation is a
married woman, the name of the husband
also appears on the invitations. Such invitations
issued by some one other than the
parents follow the form given above exactly,
save that the full name of the bride must
be given instead of her Christian name<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</SPAN></span>
alone, and, of course, the proper relationship
must be indicated by a word substituted
for <i>daughter</i>.</p>
<p>It is usual, when the bride is a step-daughter,
to specify the relationship in
the invitation. Thus, in the form given
above, if Harriet were the daughter of Mrs.
Hudson by a previous marriage, the phrase
would run, <i>at the marriage of Mrs. Hudson’s
daughter, Harriet Blake Rothwell</i>. If she
were the daughter of Mr. Hudson, the
phrase would be, <i>at the marriage of Mr.
Hudson’s daughter, Harriet</i>.</p>
<p>The invitations to either a wedding-breakfast
or reception is inclosed with the
invitation to the ceremony, but the engraved
card is of the ordinary size.</p>
<p class="center">
<i>Mr. and Mrs. Henry L. Hudson<br/>
<br/>
request the pleasure of<br/>
<br/>
..........................<br/>
<br/>
company<br/>
<br/>
on Tuesday, June first<br/>
<br/>
at half-past twelve o’clock<br/>
<br/>
Thirty-six Fremont Avenue</i><br/></p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>But often the name is omitted, and the
invitation may read simply:</p>
<p class="center">
<i>Reception<br/>
<br/>
From four o’clock<br/>
<br/>
Thirty-six Fremont Avenue</i><br/></p>
<p>The initials <i>R.s.v.p.</i> may be used in the
lower left-hand corner of either form.</p>
<p>The only essential difference in the form
of the invitation to a home-wedding is that
instead of asking for the <i>honor of your
presence</i>, the request is for the <i>pleasure of
your company</i>. Of course, the home-address
must be given at the end, instead of the
name of the church. When the ceremony
is to be performed in the presence of only
a limited number of friends, those who are
to witness it receive with their invitation
a small engraved card, inscribed <i>Ceremony
at three o’clock</i>, or whatever the hour may
be.</p>
<p>Announcement-cards, following the celebration
of a quiet wedding, are sent out
on the day of the marriage. The paper
used is the same as that for the invitations.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</SPAN></span></p>
<p class="center">
<i>Mr. and Mrs. Henry L. Hudson<br/>
<br/>
have the honor of announcing<br/>
<br/>
the marriage of their daughter<br/>
<br/>
Harriet<br/>
<br/>
to<br/>
<br/>
Mr. James Meade Trowbridge<br/>
<br/>
on Tuesday, June the first<br/>
<br/>
at the Church of The Incarnation</i><br/></p>
<p>A combination-card of bride and groom,
with their address, and perhaps her at-home
day, may be inclosed with the announcement.</p>
<p>If, for any reason, the announcement-cards
are not issued by the bride’s relatives,
they may be sent out by the engaged pair,
using the bride’s maiden name</p>
<p class="center">
<i>Mr. George Hart Bagot<br/>
<br/>
and<br/>
<br/>
Miss Mary Elizabeth Peck<br/>
<br/>
have the honor of announcing their marriage<br/>
<br/>
on Monday, June the seventh<br/>
<br/>
at the Church of The Incarnation<br/>
<br/>
Albany</i><br/></p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>Unless the invitation to a wedding carries
the letters <i>R.s.v.p.</i>, it does not require
any reply, but an invitation to the reception
or breakfast should be acknowledged
by two visiting-cards, sent to the bride’s
parents, when attendance is not possible
or convenient. An acceptance or declination
is written in the third person, and follows
the corresponding form in reference
to a dinner-invitation, with the necessary
verbal change, substituting, <i>wedding-reception
of their daughter</i>, for <i>dinner</i>.</p>
<p>No acknowledgment is required for announcement-cards;
but it is well to call
on, or leave cards for, the bride’s parents.</p>
<p>It is impossible to state exactly all the
details in connection with the marriage-ceremony,
since the variations in personal
taste and circumstances are such that the
wedding may be fittingly celebrated in
almost regal state, with a dozen bridesmaids
and everything else with like profusion,
or the rite may be carried out with
a plainness and simplicity that yet perhaps<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</SPAN></span>
yields a significance more touching
than that of the gorgeous spectacle. Each
circle in every community has its own
accepted traditions, and it is always better
that these should be followed. The vagaries
of fashion may often tempt its votaries
to extravagances in following the
fads and fancies of the moment. But there
should be no frivolous tampering with the
marriage rite, which is proclaimed as a
sacrament by the church, and should be
always esteemed as the most sacred act
in the lives of those who thus make their
covenants together.</p>
<p>It need only be added that for an evening
wedding the bridegroom wears the regulation
evening clothes, while for an hour
earlier in the day his costume includes a
frock-coat of black or dark blue, a black
or white waistcoat, and striped trousers of
a lighter shade than the coat. The scarf
should be a white ascot, caught with a
pearl pin.</p>
<p>He wears patent-leather shoes and gray<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]</SPAN></span>
suède gloves. A silk hat forms the headgear
to accompany either the evening
dress or the other.</p>
<p>A maiden bride should wear white and
a veil of tulle with orange blossoms. The
gown may be decolleté and sleeveless for
an evening wedding. A woman who has
been married before may wear any color
pleasing to her, but not white, and she
must not veil herself, nor display the
orange blossoms. A train properly distinguishes
the wedding-gown.</p>
<p>On receipt of an invitation to a wedding,
any gift should be sent to the bride without
delay. There is no obligation on the part
of a merely formal acquaintance to send
a gift when invited to a church wedding,
but it is permissible. Such an obligation
exists for one invited to the breakfast or
reception, as well as one to be among a
limited number present at the actual marriage
on the occasion of a home wedding.
Sometimes, those invited to a church wedding
compromise by sending flowers.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[150]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>The distinction between the maiden and
the matron is again emphasized in the
matter of the bouquet carried by the
bride, which for the maiden should be of
white flowers, such as lilies of the valley,
while for the woman it must be at least
touched with color—perhaps of orchids.</p>
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