<h2><SPAN name="page96"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>XI.<br/> <i>A MAN OF GENIUS</i>.</h2>
<p><span class="smcap">Felix Carter</span> was always on the look
out for unappreciated genius, the which, when discovered, he
would clothe, feed, and house until the time came—as it
invariably did come—when he found out that the gold was
tinsel. He never for one moment suspected that he himself
was the happy possessor of that divine endowment which he so
reverenced in others. And yet his friends all swore that if
any man ever were gifted with genius, Felix Carter was that
individual. He was a sort of artistic Admirable
Crichton. He painted exquisite pictures. He had
written three novels. Plays of his had been produced with
success. And he played the violin like a very
Paganini. Acquaintances spoke of him as being
eccentric. <SPAN name="page97"></SPAN><span class="pagenum">p.
97</span>But every man is accounted eccentric whose talents cover
a wide area and whose heart is abnormally large.</p>
<p>Play writing, novel spinning, and violin practice Felix
regarded as recreations. His real profession was that of an
artist. And his big bachelor establishment in a North
Western suburb of London will be remembered as the scene of some
brilliant receptions, at not a few of which Carter’s latest
Man of Genius would put in an appearance, to the great surprise
of guests, who very properly refused to see any merit whatever in
his utterances. Sometimes three or four undesirable
pensioners would be quartered on the establishment. And
although Carter’s friends deplored the circumstance, not
one of them dare remonstrate. He was the victim of
perpetual disappointment in his <i>protégés</i>,
but would resent any interference with his practical
philanthropy.</p>
<p>One of Carter’s Men of Genius lived with him and on him
for a period of more than six months. It was amusing always
to hear his enthusiasm over this big, blotchy-faced loafer.
He bored all his friends by a description of his <SPAN name="page98"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>first meeting
him, of his desire to see him again, and of the happy coincidence
of their second encounter. Carter was greatly given to
prowling about unknown London for the purpose of picking up
“effects.” He knew the opium-smoking
quarter. He had been in a thieves’ kitchen, and he
knew his way to the most disreputable common lodging-houses in
the metropolis. He occasionally dropped in at the
“White Elephant,” a public-house situated in a slum
off Fleet Street, where every night in the week a discussion took
place on the events of the day. This discussion was carried
on in a hall at the back of the “White Elephant,” and
was mainly contributed to by subsidized speakers whose feats of
oratory were intended to encourage the ambitious vestryman who
smoked his pipe there, or the occasional young barrister who
dropped in upon his way to or from the Temple. But the
audience generally was made up of solicitors’ clerks,
solicitors who had been struck off the Rolls, with here and there
a fiery disciple of Bradlaugh from the unsavoury fastnesses of
Clerkenwell. It was in this resort that Carter first saw
and admired Joseph Addison, the <SPAN name="page99"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>large and very loathsome person who
eventually shared his home.</p>
<p>“I tell you,” he would say, “Joseph is the
most wonderful chap. By Jove, sir, you should have heard
the way he pegged into those Radicals. He made them
squirm. I wish old Gladstone had been there to hear him,
upon my soul I do.”</p>
<p>Unfortunately it happened that late one night Felix
encountered his paragon lying asleep under a bench in St.
James’s Park. It is more than probable that the
creature was drunk after a day of successful sponging. But
his admirer only saw a man full of gifts and faculties suffering
from cold and hunger.</p>
<p>“By Gad, old boy,” he said in describing the
scene, “I could have cried to see a man, who could talk Sir
William Harcourt’s head off, perishing for want of a penny
roll.”</p>
<p>So Addison was treated as reverently as if he had been his
great namesake, was made free of Carter’s house, was
introduced to his studio friends, and was generally rendered a
great deal more comfortable than he deserved to be. His
appearance was sadly against him. His eyes were shifty and
blood-shot; his bushy <SPAN name="page100"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>black whiskers were never submitted
to the torture of the comb; his finger nails were invariably
dirty, and his expression was that of effrontery struggling with
awkwardness. His clothes of seedy black vainly endeavouring
to conceal an unwashed shirt seemed as if they had been
persistently slept in, and his eyeglass depending from a white
string completed the picture of a rakish adventurer.</p>
<p>It is true that these deficiences of attire were gradually
ameliorated, and Joseph Addison appeared in the linen and jackets
of our friend, to which, however, this hopeless and abominable
ale-house ornament managed to impart a debauched and dissipated
air. Of this Carter saw nothing. Nor did he consider
it extraordinary that the unsightly incubus should drink his
brandy at eleven o’clock in the morning, or that he should
smoke his Latakia out of his favourite pipes. All these
little familiarities he set down as being so many eccentricities
of genius.</p>
<p>“What’s a bottle of brandy to me if it makes
Joseph talk! I tell you I have heard that man emit epigrams
by the hour. He’s a little shy before
strangers. But you should <SPAN name="page101"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>hear him when we’re
alone. By the lord Harry, Rochfoucauld isn’t in it
with him.”</p>
<p>And so Felix Carter, a man of taste, refinement, culture, and
genius, worshipped this idol of mud, this tavern sponge, this
bar-soiled, gin-soddened impostor. So Titania was enamoured
of an ass.</p>
<p>Although it was perfectly true that Joseph Addison never
ventured on any epigrams before Carter’s friends, he
committed some of them to writing, for the benefit of
posterity. These wonderful sentiments Addison’s hand
had traced with charcoal on the white-washed walls of the studio,
and Carter would point them out with genuine enthusiasm as though
they were</p>
<blockquote><p> —jewels
five words long<br/>
That on the stretched forefinger of all time<br/>
Sparkle for ever.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Respect and love for Carter induced his associates to affect a
great belief in the value of these jewels of thought scrawled on
the walls in the most vulgar hand imaginable. That there
may be no doubt as to the literary and philosophical value of the
gems, I will reproduce them here. On one wall—just <SPAN name="page102"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>where
Carter could see it as he painted, was inscribed the
legend—</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">God Loves the
Worker</span>.</p>
<p>Opposite the entrance to the studio appeared in characters of
greater magnitude the intimation—</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Labour is
Prayer</span>.</p>
<p>While above the mantel-piece, between two beautiful
“studies” from the nude, ran the
inscription—</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Labor Omnia
Vincit</span>.</p>
<p>As the Latinity of this recondite quotation was impeccable, I
presume that Mr. Addison had extracted it from Bartlett’s
Dictionary of Quotations.</p>
<p>Had it not been for the large heart and simple faith of the
artist, one would have been inclined to see nothing in the unholy
alliance but its ludicrous side. But knowing how firm was
the faith of the victim in his new discovery, there was a dash of
pathos in it which checked laughter.</p>
<p>Many attempts were made to expose the fraud. Secret
meetings of the admirers of Carter met in adjoining
studios. All sorts of <SPAN name="page103"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>conspiracies were set on foot.
Most ingenious devices were proposed and unanimously
adopted. But they were unavailing. All were
frustrated by the unsuspicious nature of Carter, or by the low
cunning of the beer-swilling brute who was living in easy
idleness on his money. It is generally believed that at
this period certain of the younger and more enthusiastic
followers of Carter had set on foot a plot for the extermination
of Addison, and that his early assassination was by some deemed
feasible and desirable.</p>
<p>“I will tell you what it is,” said Carter on one
occasion to the most plain-spoken of his friends,
“I’ve found out why all you fellows fail to see that
Addison is a Man of Genius.”</p>
<p>“And what may the reason be?” asked Plain
Speaker.</p>
<p>“You’re all jealous of his
ability—that’s what it is.”</p>
<p>“Bah!”</p>
<p>“It’s all very well to say
‘Bah,’” said Carter, waxing enthusiastic as he
invariably did on this theme, “but it’s impossible to
explain your dislike on any other theory. Joseph is worth a
dozen of the fellows who <SPAN name="page104"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>make money by literature in these
days. I have written books myself, and ought to know
something about it. You’ll find him out one of these
days.”</p>
<p>“And so will you,” was Plain Speaker’s
response.</p>
<p>Herein Plain Speaker indulged in unconscious prophecy.
That which friendly conspirators could not bring about was
contrived by the omnipotent finger of Fate.</p>
<p>Felix Carter went to the Isle of Wight to execute a commission
for an invalid magnate in that pleasant settlement, and as he was
anxious that a trustworthy and gentlemanly person should take
charge of his house during his absence, he left his friend and
<i>protégé</i>, Joseph Addison, in that responsible
position. The artist had been about a week at work when he
came upon the following gratifying item in one of the London
papers:—</p>
<blockquote><p style="text-align: center">“POLICE
INTELLIGENCE.</p>
<p>“<span class="smcap">Bow Street</span>. A <span class="smcap">Thief</span>.—<i>Joseph Addison</i> alias
<i>Ward</i>, alias <i>Peters</i>, 40, was charged before Mr.
Flowers with stealing from the waiting-room of the Charing Cross
Station a black bag containing jewellery, the property of M.
Laurent of Paris. On the prisoner were found a gold <SPAN name="page105"></SPAN><span class="pagenum"></span>watch, an
opera-glass, a silver fruit-knife, and a valuable
cigar-case. These articles bear the initials ‘F.
C.’ The prisoner was remanded for further
inquiries.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>“My initials!” sighed Carter.</p>
<p>“Our friend will now get plenty of that labour which he
affects to love,” said Plain Speaker.</p>
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