<h3><SPAN name="CHAPTER_XXXIII" id="CHAPTER_XXXIII"></SPAN>CHAPTER XXXIII.</h3>
<p> </p>
<p>It is needless to say that the years which developed
Elinor's child into a youth on the verge of manhood,
had not passed by the others of the family without full
evidence of its progress. John Tatham was no longer
within the elastic boundaries of that conventional youth
which is allowed to stretch so far when a man remains
unmarried. He might have been characterized as
<i>encore jeune</i>, according to the fine distinction of our
neighbours in France, had he desired it. But he did
not desire it. He had never altogether neglected society,
having a wholesome liking for the company of
his fellow creatures, but neither had he ever plunged
into it as those do who must keep their places in the
crowd or die. John had pursued the middle path,
which is the most difficult. He had cultivated friends,
not a mob of acquaintances, although as people say he
"knew everybody," as a man who had attained his position
and won his success could scarcely fail to do.
He had succeeded indeed, not in the fabulous way that
some men do, but in a way which most men in his
profession looked upon as in the highest degree satisfactory.
He had a silk gown like any dowager. He
had been leading counsel in many cases which were
now of note. He was among, not the two or three perhaps,
but the twenty or thirty, who were at the head of
his profession. If he had not gone further it was perhaps
more from lack of ambition than from want of
power. He had been for years in Parliament, but preferred
his independence to the chance of office. It is
impossible to tell how John's character and wishes
might have been modified had he married and had
children round him like other men. Had the tall boy
in the north, the young hero of Lakeside, been his,
what a difference would that have made in his views of
life! But Philip was not his, nor Philip's mother—probably,
as he always said to himself, from his own
fault. This, as the reader is aware, had always been
fully recognised by John himself. Perhaps in the old
days, in those days when everything was possible, he
had not even recognised that there was but one woman
in the world whom he could ever wish to marry. Probably
it was only her appropriation by another that revealed
this fact to him. There are men like this to be
found everywhere; not so hotly constituted as to seize
for themselves what is most necessary for their personal
happiness—possessed by so many other subjects that
this seems a thing to be thought of by-and-by—which
by-and-by is generally too late.</p>
<p>But John Tatham was neither a disappointed nor an
unhappy man. He might have attained a higher development
and more brilliant and full life, but that was
all; and how few men are there of whom this could not
be said! He had become Mr. Tatham of Tatham's
Cross, as well as Q.C. and M.P., a county gentleman
of modest but effective standing, a lawyer of high reputation,
quite eligible either for the bench or for political
elevation, had he cared for either, a member of Parliament
with a distinct standing, and therefore importance
of his own. There was probably throughout England
no society in which he could have found himself where
his position and importance would have been unknown.
He was a man approaching fifty, who had not yet lost
any of the power of enjoyment or begun to feel the inroads
of decay, at the very height of life, and unconscious
that the ground would shortly begin to slope downwards
under his feet; indeed, it showed no such indication
as yet, and probably would not do so for years.
The broad plateau of middle age lasts often till sixty,
or even beyond. There was no reason to doubt that for
John Tatham it would last as long as for any man.
His health was perfect, and his habits those of a man
whose self had never demanded indulgences of the vulgar
kind. He had given up with some regret, but years
before, his chambers in the Temple: that is, he retained
them as chambers, but lived in them no longer. He
had a house in one of the streets about Belgrave Square,
one of those little bits of awkward, three-cornered
streets where there are some of the pleasantest houses
of a moderate kind in London; furnished from top to
bottom, the stairs, the comfortable quaint landings, the
bits of corridor and passage, nothing naked or neglected
about it—no cold corner; but nothing fantastic; not
very much ornament, a few good pictures, a great deal
of highly-polished, old-fashioned dark mahogany, with
a general flavour of <ins title="sic">Sherraton</ins> and Chippendale: and
abundance of books everywhere. John was able to permit
himself various little indulgences on which wives
are said to look with jealous eyes. He had a fancy for
rare editions (in which I sympathise) and also for bindings,
which seems to me a weakness—however, it was
one which he indulged in moderation. He possessed in
his drawing-room (which was not very much used) a
beautiful old-fashioned harpsichord, and also he had belonging
to him a fiddle of value untold. I ought, of
course, to say violin, or rather to distinguish the instrument
by its family name; I have no doubt it was a
Stradivarius. But there is an affectionate humour in
the fiddle which does not consist with fine titles. He
had always been fond of music, but even the Stradivarius
did not beguile him, in the days of which I speak,
to play, nor perhaps was his performance worthy of it,
though his taste was said to be excellent. It will be
perceived by all this that John Tatham's life had many
pleasures.</p>
<p>And I am not myself sorry for him because he was
not married, as many people will be. Perhaps it is a
little doleful coming home, when there is never anybody
looking out for you, expecting you. But then he
had never been accustomed to look for that, and the effect
might have been irksome rather than pleasant.
His household went on velvet under the care of a respectable
couple who had "done for" Mr. Tatham for
years. He would not have submitted to extortion or
waste, but everything was ample in the house; the
cook by no means stinted in respect to butter or any of
those condiments which are as necessary to good cooking
as air is to life. Mr. Tatham would not have understood
a lack of anything, or that what was served to
him should not have been the best, supplied and served
in the best way. Failure on such points would have so
much surprised him that he would scarcely have known
what steps to take. But Jervis, his butler, knew what
was best as well as Mr. Tatham did, and was quite as
little disposed to put up with any shortcoming. I say I
am not sorry for him that he was not married—up to
this time. But, as a matter of fact, the time does come
when one becomes sorry for the well-to-do, highly respectable,
refined, and agreeable man who has
everything that heart can desire, except the best things in
life—love, and the companionship of those who are his
very own. When old age looms in sight everything is
changed. But Mr. Tatham, as has been said, was not
quite fifty, and old age seemed as far off as if it could
never be.</p>
<p>He was a man who was very good to a number of
people, and spent almost as much money in being kind
as if he had possessed extravagant children of his
own. His sister Mary, for instance, had married a
clergyman not very well off, and the natural result had
followed. How they could have existed without Uncle
John, much less how they could have stumbled into
public schools, scholarships, and all the rest of it, would
be difficult to tell, especially now in these days when a
girl's schooling ought, we are told, to cost as much as a
boy's. This latter is a grievance which must be apparent
to the meanest capacity. Unless the girl binds
herself by the most stringent vows <i>not</i> to marry a poor
curate or other penniless man the moment that you
have completed her expensive education, I do not think
she should in any case be permitted to go to Girton.
It is all very well when the parents are rich or the girls
have a sufficiency of their own. But to spend all that on
a process which, instead of fructifying in other schools
and colleges, or producing in life a highly accomplished
woman, is to be lost at once and swallowed up in another
nursery, is the most unprofitable of benefactions.
This is what Mary Tatham's eldest girl had just done,
almost before her bills at Newnham had been paid. A
wedding present had, so to speak, been demanded from
Uncle John at the end of the bayonet to show his satisfaction
in the event which had taken all meaning out
of his exertions for little Mary. He had given it indeed—in
the shape not of a biscuit-box, which is what
she would have deserved, but of a cheque—but he was
not pleased. Neither was he pleased, as has been seen,
by the proceedings of Elinor, who had slighted all his
advice yet clung to himself in a way some women have.
I do not know whether men expect you to be quite as
much their friend as ever after they have rejected your
counsel and taken their own (exactly opposite) way:
but women do, and indeed I think expect you to be
rather grateful that they have not taken amiss the advice
which they have rejected and despised. This was
Elinor's case. She hoped that John was ashamed of
advising her to make her boy acquainted with his family
and the fact of his father's existence, and that he duly
appreciated the fact that she did not resent that advice;
and then she expected from him the same attention to
herself and her son as if the boy had been guided in his
and not in her way. Thus it will be seen his friends
and relations expected a very great deal from John.</p>
<p>He had gone to his chambers one afternoon after he
left the law courts, and was there very busily engaged
in getting up his notes for to-morrow's work, when he
received a visit which awakened at once echoes of the
past and alarms for the future in John's mind. It
was very early in the year, the end of January, and the
House was not sitting, so that his public duties were
less overwhelming than usual. His room was the same
in which we have already seen on various occasions, and
which Elinor in her youth, before anything had happened
to make life serious for her, had been in the
habit of calling the Star Chamber, for no reason in the
world except that law and penalties or judgments upon
herself in her unripe conviction, and suggestions of
what ought to be done, came from that place to which
Mrs. Dennistoun had made resort in her perplexities almost
from the very beginning of John's reign there.
Mr. Tatham had been detained beyond his usual time by
the importance of the case for which he was preparing,
and a clerk, very impatient to get free, yet obliged to
simulate content, had lighted the lamp and replenished
the fire. It had always been a comfortable room. The
lamp by which John worked had a green shade which
concentrated the light upon a table covered with that litter
of papers in which there seemed so little order, yet
which Mr. Tatham knew to the last scrap as if they had
been the tidiest in the world. The long glazed book-case
which filled up one side of the room gave a dark
reflection of the light and of the leaping brightness of
the fire. The curtains were drawn over the windows.
If the clerk fumed in the outer rooms, here all was
studious life and quiet. No spectator could have been
otherwise than impressed by the air of absolute self-concentration
with which the eminent lawyer gave himself
up to his work. He was like his lamp, giving all
the light in him to the special subject, indifferent to
everything outside.</p>
<p>"What is it, Simmons?" he said abruptly, without
looking up.</p>
<p>"A lady, sir, who says she has urgent business and
must see you."</p>
<p>"A lady—who <i>must</i> see me." John Tatham smiled
at the very ineffectual <i>must</i>, which meant coercion and
distraction to him. "I don't see how she is going to
accomplish that."</p>
<p>"I told her so," said the clerk.</p>
<p>"Well, you must tell her so again." He had scarcely
lifted his head from his work, so that it was unnecessary
to return to it when the door closed, and Mr.
Tatham went on steadily as before.</p>
<p>It is easy to concentrate the light of the lamp when
it is duly shaded and no wind to blow it about, and it
is easy to concentrate a man's attention in the absolute
quiet when nothing interrupts him; but when there
suddenly rises up a wind of talk in the room which is
separated from him only by a door, a tempest of chattering
words and laughter, shrill and bursting forth in
something like shrieks, making the student start, that
is altogether a different business. The lady outside,
who evidently had multiplied herself—unless it was
conceivable that the serious Simmons had made himself
her accomplice—had taken the cleverest way of
showing that she was not to be beat by any passive resistance
of busy man, though not even an audible conversation
with Simmons would have startled or disturbed
his master, to whom it would have been apparent
that his faithful vassal was thus defending his own
stronghold and innermost retirement. But this was
quite independent of Simmons, a discussion in two
voices, one high-pitched and shrill, the other softer, but
both absolutely unrestrained by any consciousness of
being in a place where the chatter of strange voices is
forbidden, and stillness and quiet a condition of being.
The sound of the talk rang through Mr. Tatham's head
as if all the city bells were ringing. One of the unseen
ladies had a very shrill laugh, to which she gave
vent freely. John fidgeted in his chair, raised up his
eyes above the level of his spectacles (he wore spectacles,
alas! by this time habitually when he worked) as
if lifting a voiceless appeal to those powers who interest
themselves in law cases to preserve him from disturbance,
then made a manly effort to disregard the sounds
that filled the air, returning with a shake of his head to
his reading. But at the end of a long day, and in the
dulness of the afternoon, perhaps a man is less capable
than at other moments to fight against interruption of
this kind and finally he threw down his papers and
touched his bell. Simmons came in full of pale indignation,
which made itself felt even beyond the circle
illuminated by the lamp.</p>
<p>"What can I do?" he said. "They've planted themselves
by the fire, and there they mean to stay. 'Oh,
very well, we'll wait,' they said, quite calm. And I
make no doubt they will, having nothing else to do, till
all is blue."</p>
<p>Mr. Simmons had a gift of expression of which all
his friends were flatteringly sensible, and he was very
friendly and condescending to John, of whom he had
taken care for many years.</p>
<p>"What is to be done?" said Mr. Tatham. "Can't
you do anything to get them away?"</p>
<p>Simmons shook his head. "There's two of them,"
he said, "and they entertain each other, and they think
it's fun to jabber like that in a lawyer's office. The
young one says, 'What a queer place!' and the other,
she holds forth about other times when she's been
here."</p>
<p>"Oh, she's been here other times<span class="norewrap">——</span> Do you know
her, Simmons?"</p>
<p>"Not from Adam, Mr. Tatham—or, I should say,
from Eve, as she's a lady. But a real lady I should say,
though she don't behave herself as such—one of the
impudent ones. They are never impudent like that,"
said Mr. Simmons, with profound observation, "unless
they are real high or—real low."</p>
<p>"Hum!" said John, hesitating. And then he added,
"There is a young one, you say?"</p>
<p>But I do not myself think, though the light-minded
may imagine it to be so, that it was because there was
a young one that John gave in. It was because he
could do nothing else, the noise and chatter of the
voices being entirely destructive of that undisturbed
state of the atmosphere in which work can be done.
It was not merely the sounds but the vibration they
made in the air, breaking all its harmony and concentration.
He tried a little longer, but was unsuccessful,
and finally in despair he said to Simmons, "You had
better show them in, and let me get done with them,"
in an angry tone.</p>
<p>"Oh, he will see us after all," said the high-pitched
voice. "So good of Mr. Tatham; but of course I
should have waited all the same. Dolly, take Toto; I
can't possibly get up while I have him on my knee.
You can tell Mr. Tatham I did not send in my name to
disturb him, which makes it all the more charitable of
him to receive me; but, dear me, of course I can tell
him that himself as he consents to see us. Dolly, don't
strangle my poor darling! I never saw a girl that didn't
know how to take up a dear dog before."</p>
<p>"He's only a snappish little demon, and you spoil
him so," said the other voice. This was attended by
the sound of movement as if the party were getting
under weigh.</p>
<p>"My poor darling pet, it is only her jealousy: is
that the way? Yes, to be sure it is the next room.
Now, Dolly, remember this is where all the poor people
are ruined and done for. Leave hope behind all ye
who enter here." A little shriek of laughter ended
this speech. And John, looking up, taking off his
spectacles, and raising a little the shade of the lamp,
saw in the doorway Lady Mariamne, altered as was inevitable
by the strain and stress of nearly twenty years.</p>
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