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<h1>THE GOOP DIRECTORY</h1>
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<h2> INTRODUCTION </h2>
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<p>In this DIRECTORY you'll see<br/>
Just what you never ought to be;<br/>
And so, it should Direct your way<br/>
To Good Behavior, every day.<br/>
The children of whose faults I tell<br/>
Are known by other names, as well,<br/>
So see that <i>you</i> aren't in this group<br/>
Of Naughty Ones. <i>Don't be a Goop</i>!<br/></p>
<p> </p>
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<h2> MARMADUKE ARGYLL </h2>
<center><i>Talking while Eating</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/007.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Talking While Eating">
<p> </p>
<p>A Goop that always<br/>
makes me smile<br/>
Is this one:<br/>
Marmaduke Argyll.<br/>
His mouth is full<br/>
from cheek to cheek,<br/>
Why should he then<br/>
attempt to speak?<br/>
It makes me smile,<br/>
but still, the fact is,<br/>
It is a most<br/>
unpleasant practice.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> NANCY BEAL </h2>
<center><i>Throwing Away Things</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/009.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Throwing Away Things">
<p> </p>
<p>On the sidewalk<br/>
Nancy Beal<br/>
Throws her old<br/>
banana peel;<br/>
Throws her apple<br/>
skin and cores,<br/>
Right in front<br/>
of people's doors!<br/>
Isn't that a<br/>
shocking trick?<br/>
Ask that Goop<br/>
to stop it, quick!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> MASTER BILDAD </h2>
<center><i>Selfish With Toys</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/011.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Selfish With Toys">
<p> </p>
<p>A puppy, when he<br/>
gets a bone,<br/>
Will keep it for<br/>
himself alone.<br/>
So Bildad would not<br/>
share his toys<br/>
Or lend them to<br/>
the other boys.<br/>
He was a Goop;<br/>
and so are you<br/>
If you are ever<br/>
selfish, too!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> PERCY BINGG </h2>
<center><i>In the Way</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/013.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="In the Way">
<p> </p>
<p>Percy Bingg,<br/>
when he's at play,<br/>
Is almost always<br/>
in the way;<br/>
In the room,<br/>
or in the street,<br/>
Always under<br/>
people's feet!<br/>
Goops like that<br/>
annoy me so!<br/>
<i>You</i> keep out<br/>
the way, I know!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> BETSY BIRCH </h2>
<center><i>Talking in Church</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/015.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Talking in Church">
<p> </p>
<p>Look at little<br/>
Betsy Birch,<br/>
Always whispering<br/>
in church!<br/>
Always playing<br/>
with the books,<br/>
Never caring<br/>
how she looks!<br/>
Never knowing<br/>
Goops like her<br/>
Ought to neither<br/>
talk nor stir!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> LEVI BOING </h2>
<center><i>Going Carelessly</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/017.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Going Carelessly">
<p> </p>
<p>Are you a Goop,<br/>
like Levi Boing?<br/>
He never looks<br/>
where he is going;<br/>
He's always bumping<br/>
into chairs,<br/>
And stumbling, when<br/>
he goes upstairs;<br/>
He tips things over,<br/>
bumps his nose.<br/>
He <i>can't</i> be careful,<br/>
I suppose!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> MARY C. C. CALL </h2>
<center><i>Crying Continually</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/019.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Crying Continually">
<p> </p>
<p>Mary Carey<br/>
Cory Call—<br/>
Hear her cry and<br/>
hear her bawl!<br/>
Hear her groan!<br/>
Hear her growl!<br/>
Hear her moan!—<br/>
Hear her howl!<br/>
She's the goopiest<br/>
Goop of all,<br/>
Mary Carey<br/>
Cory Call!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> LITTLE CORALIE </h2>
<center><i>Getting Feet Wet</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/021.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Getting Feet Wet">
<p> </p>
<p>Though Coralie<br/>
was small and sweet,<br/>
She always, always<br/>
had wet feet.<br/>
She liked to walk<br/>
through puddles; so,<br/>
She always had<br/>
a cold, you know.<br/>
But as <i>you</i> aren't<br/>
a Goop, you try<br/>
To keep your tootsies<br/>
warm and dry.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ANDREW CROSSETT </h2>
<center><i>Playing With Faucet</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/023.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Playing With Faucet">
<p> </p>
<p>Have you heard how<br/>
Andrew Crossett<br/>
Meddled with the<br/>
water-faucet?<br/>
Letting water<br/>
flood the sink?<br/>
Andrew was<br/>
a Goop, I think;<br/>
Otherwise he<br/>
would have known<br/>
He should let<br/>
such things alone!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ANNABELLA DAY </h2>
<center><i>Obeying Slowly</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/025.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Obeying Slowly">
<p> </p>
<p>How slow is<br/>
Annabella Day!<br/>
She's <i>so</i> reluctant<br/>
to obey!<br/>
She acts so sluggish<br/>
and so sickly!<br/>
Oh, Anna, why not<br/>
do it quickly?<br/>
Oh, Anna, do be<br/>
prompt, and then,<br/>
No one will call<br/>
you "Goop" again!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> GWENDOLYN De V. De WITT </h2>
<center><i>Sulking</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/027.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Sulking">
<p> </p>
<p>Miss Gwendolyn<br/>
De Vere De Witt<br/>
Is having <i>such</i><br/>
a sulky fit!<br/>
Because she couldn't<br/>
have her way<br/>
With other children<br/>
at their play.<br/>
A sulky Goop<br/>
I really call<br/>
As bad as those<br/>
who cry and bawl.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ADOLPHUS ELFINSTONE </h2>
<center><i>Playing With Matches</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/029.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Playing With Matches">
<p> </p>
<p>Adolphus Elfinstone,<br/>
of Nachez,<br/>
Thought it was fun<br/>
to play with matches<br/>
Until the little Goop<br/>
had learned<br/>
It hurt a lot<br/>
when he got burned!<br/>
A <i>little</i> fire<br/>
is queer and curious;<br/>
But soon it grows<br/>
quite big and furious.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> AMANDA FISH </h2>
<center><i>Stealing Sweets</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/031.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Stealing Sweets">
<p> </p>
<p>If there's sugar<br/>
in the dish,<br/>
Who will take it?<br/>
Mandy Fish?<br/>
If there is a<br/>
box of candy,<br/>
Just look out<br/>
for little Mandy!<br/>
She goops the fruit,<br/>
and leaves the peeling—<br/>
<i>She</i> calls it fun;<br/>
I call it stealing!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> FREDERICK FISHER </h2>
<center><i>Not Eating Crusts</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/033.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Not Eating Crusts">
<p> </p>
<p>Freddie Fisher<br/>
fairly fussed<br/>
When he came<br/>
to eat his crust!<br/>
Often on the floor<br/>
he'd throw it,<br/>
Hoping mother<br/>
wouldn't know it!<br/>
Goops all hate<br/>
to eat the crust;<br/>
If you're told to,<br/>
then you must!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> EZRA HECHT </h2>
<center><i>Not Minding Mother</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/035.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Not Minding Mother">
<p> </p>
<p>What in the world<br/>
would you expect<br/>
Of a Goop whose name<br/>
was Ezra Hecht?<br/>
Of <i>course</i> he would<br/>
refuse to heed<br/>
Or mind his mother—<br/>
yes indeed!<br/>
Of course he would.<br/>
Of course he did.<br/>
But <i>you</i> must do<br/>
what you are bid.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> M. AND B. HOPPER </h2>
<center><i>Restless While Dressing</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/037.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Restless While Dressing">
<p> </p>
<p>Mother always<br/>
is distressed<br/>
If you fidget<br/>
when you're dressed.<br/>
If you fidget<br/>
like Miss Midget,<br/>
Hopper, or her<br/>
sister Bridget.<br/>
Goops like that<br/>
are <i>so</i> much bother,<br/>
That they ought to<br/>
dress each other!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> AMANDA M. JAMES </h2>
<center><i>Calling Names</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/039.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Calling Names">
<p> </p>
<p>Amanda Minnesinger<br/>
James<br/>
She called her sister<br/>
horrid names!<br/>
She called her brother<br/>
names, as well,<br/>
So bad I wouldn't<br/>
dare to tell!<br/>
It's shocking how<br/>
a Goop will act!<br/>
They have no manners,<br/>
that's a fact.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> SUSIE KLEIN </h2>
<center><i>Whining</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/041.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Whining">
<p> </p>
<p>When e'er I hear<br/>
a puppy whine,<br/>
I always think<br/>
of Susie Klein;<br/>
I think of how<br/>
she hangs her head,<br/>
She doesn't speak—<br/>
she <i>whines</i>, instead!<br/>
Don't whine! If you<br/>
don't speak right out,<br/>
You are a Goop,<br/>
without a doubt!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ROBERTO LEES </h2>
<center><i>Teasing animals</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/043.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Teasing animals">
<p> </p>
<p>How thoughtless was<br/>
Roberto Lees!<br/>
(For only thoughtless<br/>
children tease).<br/>
He teased the little<br/>
pussy cat,<br/>
He teased the puppy!<br/>
Think of that!<br/>
He even teased<br/>
his sister, too!<br/>
I think he was<br/>
a Goop—don't you?<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ANNIE A. LeGRAND </h2>
<center><i>Lying and Fibbing</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/045.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Lying and Fibbing">
<p> </p>
<p>The queerest Goop<br/>
in all the land<br/>
Was Annie Annabelle<br/>
LeGrand;<br/>
She often said<br/>
what wasn't true—<br/>
Which is an awful<br/>
thing to do!<br/>
But we are honest,<br/>
you and I,<br/>
We think it's wrong<br/>
to tell a lie!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> MISS MACKADOO </h2>
<center><i>Not answering</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/047.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Not answering">
<p> </p>
<p>This is a Goop—<br/>
Miss Mackadoo;<br/>
She never speaks<br/>
when spoken to.<br/>
When spoken to,<br/>
she turns her eyes,<br/>
And never answers<br/>
or replies.<br/>
She hangs her head<br/>
and sucks her thumb—<br/>
You'd think that she<br/>
was deaf and dumb!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ISABEL McCLUNG </h2>
<center><i>Sticking out Tongue</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/049.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Sticking out Tongue">
<p> </p>
<p>Do you ever<br/>
stick your tongue<br/>
Out, like<br/>
Isabel McClung?<br/>
No one but<br/>
a Goop would show<br/>
Rudeness such as that,<br/>
I know!<br/>
If you're good,<br/>
take my advice;<br/>
<i>Please</i> don't do it!<br/>
'Tisn't nice.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ALEXANDER B. McGIFF </h2>
<center><i>Not Wiping Nose</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/051.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Not Wiping Nose">
<p> </p>
<p>Young Alexander<br/>
B. McGiff<br/>
Each day had a<br/>
clean handkerchief.<br/>
In spite of this,<br/>
if you'll believe,<br/>
He wiped his nose<br/>
upon his sleeve!<br/>
Nobody but a Goop<br/>
would do it;<br/>
His mother'd scold him,<br/>
if she knew it.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> ELIAS E. McGUFF </h2>
<center><i>Rough and Rude</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/053.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Rough and Rude">
<p> </p>
<p>Elias Ethelbert<br/>
McGuff,<br/>
Oh, he was rude<br/>
and he was rough!<br/>
He used to pinch,<br/>
he used to poke,<br/>
And called his rudeness<br/>
just a joke.<br/>
What made him plague<br/>
his playmates so?<br/>
He was a Goop<br/>
and didn't know!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> SOLOMON McKIM </h2>
<center><i>Scuffing Feet</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/055.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Scuffing Feet">
<p> </p>
<p>I wonder if<br/>
you ever meet<br/>
The Goop who always<br/>
scuffs his feet?<br/>
He makes them drag<br/>
along the floor<br/>
As if they weighed<br/>
a ton or more.<br/>
Just think of<br/>
Solomon McKim,<br/>
And don't be slovenly<br/>
like him!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
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<h2> JOHN D. PELL </h2>
<center><i>Ordering People</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/057.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Ordering People">
<p> </p>
<p>When John D. Pell<br/>
wants something done,<br/>
D'you think he <i>asks</i><br/>
of anyone?<br/>
Oh, no! He <i>orders</i><br/>
someone to,<br/>
With "Get my hat!"<br/>
or, "Tie my shoe!"<br/>
The Goops all say<br/>
rude things like these,<br/>
But you, of course,<br/>
say, "If you please!"<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-29"><!-- Image 29 --></SPAN>
<h2> ESAU POUND </h2>
<center><i>Leaving Things Around</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/059.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Leaving Things Around">
<p> </p>
<p>When you're finished<br/>
with your play,<br/>
Do you put<br/>
your toys away?<br/>
Do you put<br/>
away your hat,<br/>
And your coat,<br/>
and things like that?<br/>
Or, are you<br/>
like Esau Pound?<br/>
He's the Goop<br/>
who leaves things 'round!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-30"><!-- Image 30 --></SPAN>
<h2> ELIZA PUDDINGFOOT </h2>
<center><i>Cheating at Play</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/061.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Cheating at Play">
<p> </p>
<p>If you should ask<br/>
why Rosamund<br/>
Eliza Puddingfoot<br/>
was shunned,<br/>
I'd say, because<br/>
she'd always cheat<br/>
In every game,<br/>
so she could beat.<br/>
Only a Goop<br/>
would act that way<br/>
And be dishonest<br/>
in her play.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-31"><!-- Image 31 --></SPAN>
<h2> AMELIA PRATT </h2>
<center><i>Saying "I Won't"</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/063.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Saying 'I Won't'">
<p> </p>
<p>"I won't!" says young<br/>
Amelia Pratt;<br/>
"I won't do this!"<br/>
"I won't do that!"<br/>
Now isn't "won't"<br/>
the naughtiest word<br/>
That anyone<br/>
has ever heard?<br/>
Now isn't that<br/>
the rudest way<br/>
A Goop could answer?<br/>
I should say!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-32"><!-- Image 32 --></SPAN>
<h2> JUMBO RAY </h2>
<center><i>Snatching Toys</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/065.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Snatching Toys">
<p> </p>
<p>No children ever<br/>
like to play<br/>
With such a Goop<br/>
as Jumbo Ray.<br/>
For he will snatch<br/>
and grab the toys<br/>
Of all the little<br/>
girls and boys.<br/>
Though Jumbo loves<br/>
to fuss and fight,<br/>
<i>You</i> know, of course,<br/>
it isn't right.<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-33"><!-- Image 33 --></SPAN>
<h2> ANNIE F. R. RIFF </h2>
<center><i>Snuffling and Sniffling</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/067.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Snuffling and Sniffling">
<p> </p>
<p>Annie Fanny<br/>
Ruffle Riff;<br/>
Hear her snuffle!<br/>
Hear her sniff!<br/>
Hear her sniffle!<br/>
Hear her snuff!—<br/>
See her—well,<br/>
I've said enough.<br/>
<i>You</i> have seen her,<br/>
I suppose,<br/>
The Goop who seldom<br/>
blows her nose?<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-34"><!-- Image 34 --></SPAN>
<h2> FELICIA ROPPS </h2>
<center><i>Handling Things</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/069.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Handling Things">
<p> </p>
<p>Funny, how<br/>
Felicia Ropps<br/>
Always handles<br/>
things in shops!<br/>
Always pinching,<br/>
always poking,<br/>
Alwyas feeling,<br/>
always stroking<br/>
Things she has<br/>
no right to touch!<br/>
Goops like that<br/>
annoy me much!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-35"><!-- Image 35 --></SPAN>
<h2> PERCIVAL B. SLOOP </h2>
<center><i>Acting Uncleanly</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/071.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Acting Uncleanly">
<p> </p>
<p>Just look at<br/>
Percival B. Sloop,<br/>
A most unpleasant<br/>
sort of Goop;<br/>
He pokes his fingers<br/>
in his nose<br/>
And wipes his hands<br/>
upon his clothes;<br/>
He does a lot<br/>
of things that you,<br/>
I know, would never,<br/>
never do!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-36"><!-- Image 36 --></SPAN>
<h2> SUSIE SMALT </h2>
<center><i>Blaming Others</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/073.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Blaming Others">
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh," says little<br/>
Susie Smalt,<br/>
"It is someone<br/>
else's fault!"<br/>
"<i>She</i> began it!"<br/>
"<i>She's</i> to blame!"<br/>
"<i>She's</i> the one that<br/>
spoiled the game!"<br/>
So Goops always<br/>
blame each other;<br/>
Do <i>you</i> own up<br/>
your fault to Mother?<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-37"><!-- Image 37 --></SPAN>
<h2> SPERRY SPROOKS </h2>
<center><i>Tearing Books</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/075.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Tearing Books">
<p> </p>
<p>Have you ever<br/>
chanced to look<br/>
At a torn and<br/>
dirty book?<br/>
At a book that's<br/>
ragged, soiled,<br/>
Inked and finger-<br/>
marked and spoiled?<br/>
Who has done it?<br/>
Sperry Sprooks!<br/>
He's the Goop<br/>
that spoils the books!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-38"><!-- Image 38 --></SPAN>
<h2> URIAH STEAD </h2>
<center><i>Not Going to Bed</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/077.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Not Going to Bed">
<p> </p>
<p>I never saw<br/>
Uriah Stead<br/>
When he was glad<br/>
to go to bed.<br/>
There always was<br/>
<i>one</i> thing to do<br/>
Before he could<br/>
take off a shoe!<br/>
The little Goop<br/>
was always late;<br/>
I hope <i>you</i> don't<br/>
pro-cras-ti-nate!<br/></p>
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<p> </p>
<SPAN name="image-39"><!-- Image 39 --></SPAN>
<h2> ROSIE L. V. TROOD </h2>
<center><i>Playing With Food</i></center>
<ANTIMG src="images/079.png" height-obs="387" width-obs="314" align=left alt="Playing With Food">
<p> </p>
<p>Rosie Lily<br/>
Violet Trood,<br/>
Always messes<br/>
with her food;<br/>
Always plays with<br/>
her potatoes,<br/>
Meat and gravy<br/>
and tomatoes!<br/>
Callers, who are<br/>
asked to dine,<br/>
Knowing she's<br/>
a Goop, decline!<br/></p>
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