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<h2> LETTER CXII </h2>
<h3> LONDON, May 8, O. S. 1750 </h3>
<p>MY DEAR FRIEND: At your age the love of pleasures is extremely natural,
and the enjoyment of them not unbecoming: but the danger, at your age, is
mistaking the object, and setting out wrong in the pursuit. The character
of a man of pleasure dazzles young eyes; they do not see their way to it
distinctly, and fall into vice and profligacy. I remember a strong
instance of this a great many years ago. A young fellow, determined to
shine as a man of pleasure, was at the play called the "Libertine
Destroyed," a translation of 'Le Festin de Pierre' of Molieire's. He was
so struck with what he thought the fine character of the libertine, that
he swore he would be the LIBERTINE DESTROYED. Some friends asked him,
whether he had not better content himself with being only the libertine,
but without being DESTROYED? to which he answered with great warmth, "No,
for that being destroyed was the perfection of the whole." This,
extravagant as it seems in this light, is really the case of many an
unfortunate young fellow, who, captivated by the name of pleasures, rushes
indiscriminately, and without taste, into them all, and is finally
DESTROYED. I am not stoically advising, nor parsonically preaching to you
to be a Stoic at your age; far from it: I am pointing out to you the paths
to pleasures, and am endeavoring only to quicken and heighten them for
you. Enjoy pleasures, but let them be your own, and then you will taste
them; but adopt none; trust to nature for genuine ones. The pleasures that
you would feel you must earn; the man who gives himself up to all, feels
none sensibly. Sardanapalus, I am convinced, never felt any in his life.
Those only who join serious occupations with pleasures, feel either as
they should do. Alcibiades, though addicted to the most shameful excesses,
gave some time to philosophy, and some to business. Julius Caesar joined
business with pleasure so properly, that they mutually assisted each
other; and though he was the husband of all the wives at Rome, he found
time to be one of the best scholars, almost the best orator, and
absolutely the best general there. An uninterrupted life of pleasures is
as insipid as contemptible. Some hours given every day to serious business
must whet both the mind and the senses, to enjoy those of pleasure. A
surfeited glutton, an emaciated sot, and an enervated rotten whoremaster,
never enjoy the pleasures to which they devote themselves; but they are
only so many human sacrifices to false gods. The pleasures of low life are
all of this mistaken, merely sensual, and disgraceful nature; whereas,
those of high life, and in good company (though possibly in themselves not
more moral) are more delicate, more refined, less dangerous, and less
disgraceful; and, in the common course of things, not reckoned disgraceful
at all. In short, pleasure must not, nay, cannot, be the business of a man
of sense and character; but it may be, and is, his relief, his reward. It
is particularly so with regard to the women; who have the utmost contempt
for those men, that, having no character nor consideration with their own
sex, frivolously pass their whole time in 'ruelles' and at 'toilettes'.
They look upon them as their lumber, and remove them whenever they can get
better furniture. Women choose their favorites more by the ear than by any
other of their senses or even their understandings. The man whom they hear
the most commended by the men, will always be the best received by them.
Such a conquest flatters their vanity, and vanity is their universal, if
not their strongest passion. A distinguished shining character is
irresistible with them; they crowd to, nay, they even quarrel for the
danger in hopes of the triumph. Though, by the way (to use a vulgar
expression), she who conquers only catches a Tartar, and becomes the slave
of her captive. 'Mais c'est la leur affaire'. Divide your time between
useful occupations and elegant pleasures. The morning seems to belong to
study, business, or serious conversations with men of learning and figure;
not that I exclude an occasional hour at a toilette. From sitting down to
dinner, the proper business of the day is pleasure, unless real business,
which must never be postponed for pleasure, happens accidentally to
interfere. In good company, the pleasures of the table are always carried
to a certain point of delicacy and gratification, but never to excess and
riot. Plays, operas, balls, suppers, gay conversations in polite and
cheerful companies, properly conclude the evenings; not to mention the
tender looks that you may direct and the sighs that you may offer, upon
these several occasions, to some propitious or unpropitious female deity,
whose character and manners will neither disgrace nor corrupt yours. This
is the life of a man of real sense and pleasure; and by this distribution
of your time, and choice of your pleasures, you will be equally qualified
for the busy, or the 'beau monde'. You see I am not rigid, and do not
require that you and I should be of the same age. What I say to you,
therefore, should have the more weight, as coming from a friend, not a
father. But low company, and their low vices, their indecent riots and
profligacy, I never will bear nor forgive.</p>
<p>I have lately received two volumes of treaties, in German and Latin, from
Hawkins, with your orders, under your own hand, to take care of them for
you, which orders I shall most dutifully and punctually obey, and they
wait for you in my library, together with your great collection of rare
books, which your Mamma sent me upon removing from her old house.</p>
<p>I hope you not only keep up, but improve in your German, for it will be of
great use to you when you cone into business; and the more so, as you will
be almost the only Englishman who either can speak or understand it. Pray
speak it constantly to all Germans, wherever you meet them, and you will
meet multitudes of them at Paris. Is Italian now become easy and familiar
to you? Can you speak it with the same fluency that you can speak German?
You cannot conceive what an advantage it will give you in negotiations to
possess Italian, German, and French perfectly, so as to understand all the
force and finesse of those three languages. If two men of equal talents
negotiate together, he who best understands the language in which the
negotiation is carried on, will infallibly get the better of the other.
The signification and force of one single word is often of great
consequence in a treaty, and even in a letter.</p>
<p>Remember the GRACES, for without them 'ogni fatica e vana'. Adieu.</p>
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