<h2>CHAPTER IX.</h2>
<p>“I suppose I ought to enjoy the joke of what’s
going on here,” I wrote, “but somehow it
doesn’t amuse me. Pessimism on the contrary possesses
me and cynicism deeply engages. I positively feel my own
flesh sore from the brass nails in Neil Paraday’s social
harness. The house is full of people who like him, as they
mention, awfully, and with whom his talent for talking nonsense
has prodigious success. I delight in his nonsense myself;
why is it therefore that I grudge these happy folk their artless
satisfaction? Mystery of the human heart—abyss of the
critical spirit! Mrs. Wimbush thinks she can answer that
question, and as my want of gaiety has at last worn out her
patience she has given me a glimpse of her shrewd guess.
I’m made restless by the selfishness of the insincere
friend—I want to monopolise Paraday in order that he may
push me on. To be intimate with him is a feather in my cap;
it gives me an importance that I couldn’t naturally pretend
to, and I seek to deprive him of social refreshment because I
fear that meeting more disinterested people may enlighten him as
to my real motive. All the disinterested people here are
his particular admirers and have been carefully selected as
such. There’s supposed to be a copy of his last book
in the house, and in the hall I come upon ladies, in attitudes,
bending gracefully over the first volume. I discreetly
avert my eyes, and when I next look round the precarious joy has
been superseded by the book of life. There’s a
sociable circle or a confidential couple, and the relinquished
volume lies open on its face and as dropped under extreme
coercion. Somebody else presently finds it and transfers
it, with its air of momentary desolation, to another piece of
furniture. Every one’s asking every one about it all
day, and every one’s telling every one where they put it
last. I’m sure it’s rather smudgy about the
twentieth page. I’ve a strong impression, too, that
the second volume is lost—has been packed in the bag of
some departing guest; and yet everybody has the impression that
somebody else has read to the end. You see therefore that
the beautiful book plays a great part in our existence. Why
should I take the occasion of such distinguished honours to say
that I begin to see deeper into Gustave Flaubert’s doleful
refrain about the hatred of literature? I refer you again
to the perverse constitution of man.</p>
<p>“The Princess is a massive lady with the organisation of
an athlete and the confusion of tongues of a valet de
place. She contrives to commit herself extraordinarily
little in a great many languages, and is entertained and
conversed with in detachments and relays, like an institution
which goes on from generation to generation or a big building
contracted for under a forfeit. She can’t have a
personal taste any more than, when her husband succeeds, she can
have a personal crown, and her opinion on any matter is rusty and
heavy and plain—made, in the night of ages, to last and be
transmitted. I feel as if I ought to ‘tip’ some
custode for my glimpse of it. She has been told everything
in the world and has never perceived anything, and the echoes of
her education respond awfully to the rash footfall—I mean
the casual remark—in the cold Valhalla of her memory.
Mrs. Wimbush delights in her wit and says there’s nothing
so charming as to hear Mr. Paraday draw it out. He’s
perpetually detailed for this job, and he tells me it has a
peculiarly exhausting effect. Every one’s
beginning—at the end of two days—to sidle
obsequiously away from her, and Mrs. Wimbush pushes him again and
again into the breach. None of the uses I have yet seen him
put to infuriate me quite so much. He looks very fagged and
has at last confessed to me that his condition makes him
uneasy—has even promised me he’ll go straight home
instead of returning to his final engagements in town. Last
night I had some talk with him about going to-day, cutting his
visit short; so sure am I that he’ll be better as soon as
he’s shut up in his lighthouse. He told me that this
is what he would like to do; reminding me, however, that the
first lesson of his greatness has been precisely that he
can’t do what he likes. Mrs. Wimbush would never
forgive him if he should leave her before the Princess has
received the last hand. When I hint that a violent rupture
with our hostess would be the best thing in the world for him he
gives me to understand that if his reason assents to the
proposition his courage hangs woefully back. He makes no
secret of being mortally afraid of her, and when I ask what harm
she can do him that she hasn’t already done he simply
repeats: ‘I’m afraid, I’m afraid!
Don’t enquire too closely,’ he said last night;
‘only believe that I feel a sort of terror.
It’s strange, when she’s so kind! At any rate,
I’d as soon overturn that piece of priceless Sèvres
as tell her I must go before my date.’ It sounds
dreadfully weak, but he has some reason, and he pays for his
imagination, which puts him (I should hate it) in the place of
others and makes him feel, even against himself, their feelings,
their appetites, their motives. It’s indeed
inveterately against himself that he makes his imagination
act. What a pity he has such a lot of it! He’s
too beastly intelligent. Besides, the famous
reading’s still to come off, and it has been postponed a
day to allow Guy Walsingham to arrive. It appears this
eminent lady’s staying at a house a few miles off, which
means of course that Mrs. Wimbush has forcibly annexed her.
She’s to come over in a day or two—Mrs. Wimbush wants
her to hear Mr. Paraday.</p>
<p>“To-day’s wet and cold, and several of the
company, at the invitation of the Duke, have driven over to
luncheon at Bigwood. I saw poor Paraday wedge himself, by
command, into the little supplementary seat of a brougham in
which the Princess and our hostess were already ensconced.
If the front glass isn’t open on his dear old back perhaps
he’ll survive. Bigwood, I believe, is very grand and
frigid, all marble and precedence, and I wish him well out of the
adventure. I can’t tell you how much more and more
your attitude to him, in the midst of all this, shines out by
contrast. I never willingly talk to these people about him,
but see what a comfort I find it to scribble to you! I
appreciate it—it keeps me warm; there are no fires in the
house. Mrs. Wimbush goes by the calendar, the temperature
goes by the weather, the weather goes by God knows what, and the
Princess is easily heated. I’ve nothing but my
acrimony to warm me, and have been out under an umbrella to
restore my circulation. Coming in an hour ago I found Lady
Augusta Minch rummaging about the hall. When I asked her
what she was looking for she said she had mislaid something that
Mr. Paraday had lent her. I ascertained in a moment that
the article in question is a manuscript, and I’ve a
foreboding that it’s the noble morsel he read me six weeks
ago. When I expressed my surprise that he should have
bandied about anything so precious (I happen to know it’s
his only copy—in the most beautiful hand in all the world)
Lady Augusta confessed to me that she hadn’t had it from
himself, but from Mrs. Wimbush, who had wished to give her a
glimpse of it as a salve for her not being able to stay and hear
it read.</p>
<p>“‘Is that the piece he’s to read,’ I
asked, ‘when Guy Walsingham arrives?’</p>
<p>“‘It’s not for Guy Walsingham they’re
waiting now, it’s for Dora Forbes,’ Lady Augusta
said. ‘She’s coming, I believe, early
to-morrow. Meanwhile Mrs. Wimbush has found out about him,
and is actively wiring to him. She says he also must hear
him.’</p>
<p>“‘You bewilder me a little,’ I replied;
‘in the age we live in one gets lost among the genders and
the pronouns. The clear thing is that Mrs. Wimbush
doesn’t guard such a treasure so jealously as she
might.’</p>
<p>“‘Poor dear, she has the Princess to guard!
Mr. Paraday lent her the manuscript to look over.’</p>
<p>“‘She spoke, you mean, as if it were the morning
paper?’</p>
<p>“Lady Augusta stared—my irony was lost on
her. ‘She didn’t have time, so she gave me a
chance first; because unfortunately I go to-morrow to
Bigwood.’</p>
<p>“‘And your chance has only proved a chance to lose
it?’</p>
<p>“‘I haven’t lost it. I remember
now—it was very stupid of me to have forgotten. I
told my maid to give it to Lord Dorimont—or at least to his
man.’</p>
<p>“‘And Lord Dorimont went away directly after
luncheon.’</p>
<p>“‘Of course he gave it back to my maid—or
else his man did,’ said Lady Augusta. ‘I dare
say it’s all right.’</p>
<p>“The conscience of these people is like a summer
sea. They haven’t time to look over a priceless
composition; they’ve only time to kick it about the
house. I suggested that the ‘man,’ fired with a
noble emulation, had perhaps kept the work for his own perusal;
and her ladyship wanted to know whether, if the thing
shouldn’t reappear for the grand occasion appointed by our
hostess, the author wouldn’t have something else to read
that would do just as well. Their questions are too
delightful! I declared to Lady Augusta briefly that nothing
in the world can ever do so well as the thing that does best; and
at this she looked a little disconcerted. But I added that
if the manuscript had gone astray our little circle would have
the less of an effort of attention to make. The piece in
question was very long—it would keep them three hours.</p>
<p>“‘Three hours! Oh the Princess will get
up!’ said Lady Augusta.</p>
<p>“‘I thought she was Mr. Paraday’s greatest
admirer.’</p>
<p>“‘I dare say she is—she’s so awfully
clever. But what’s the use of being a
Princess—’</p>
<p>“‘If you can’t dissemble your love?’ I
asked as Lady Augusta was vague. She said at any rate
she’d question her maid; and I’m hoping that when I
go down to dinner I shall find the manuscript has been
recovered.”</p>
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