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<h2> XLIV. THE STILLEST HOUR. </h2>
<p>What hath happened unto me, my friends? Ye see me troubled, driven forth,
unwillingly obedient, ready to go—alas, to go away from YOU!</p>
<p>Yea, once more must Zarathustra retire to his solitude: but unjoyously
this time doth the bear go back to his cave!</p>
<p>What hath happened unto me? Who ordereth this?—Ah, mine angry
mistress wisheth it so; she spake unto me. Have I ever named her name to
you?</p>
<p>Yesterday towards evening there spake unto me MY STILLEST HOUR: that is
the name of my terrible mistress.</p>
<p>And thus did it happen—for everything must I tell you, that your
heart may not harden against the suddenly departing one!</p>
<p>Do ye know the terror of him who falleth asleep?—</p>
<p>To the very toes he is terrified, because the ground giveth way under him,
and the dream beginneth.</p>
<p>This do I speak unto you in parable. Yesterday at the stillest hour did
the ground give way under me: the dream began.</p>
<p>The hour-hand moved on, the timepiece of my life drew breath—never
did I hear such stillness around me, so that my heart was terrified.</p>
<p>Then was there spoken unto me without voice: "THOU KNOWEST IT,
ZARATHUSTRA?"—</p>
<p>And I cried in terror at this whispering, and the blood left my face: but
I was silent.</p>
<p>Then was there once more spoken unto me without voice: "Thou knowest it,
Zarathustra, but thou dost not speak it!"—</p>
<p>And at last I answered, like one defiant: "Yea, I know it, but I will not
speak it!"</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "Thou WILT not,
Zarathustra? Is this true? Conceal thyself not behind thy defiance!"—</p>
<p>And I wept and trembled like a child, and said: "Ah, I would indeed, but
how can I do it! Exempt me only from this! It is beyond my power!"</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "What matter about
thyself, Zarathustra! Speak thy word, and succumb!"</p>
<p>And I answered: "Ah, is it MY word? Who am <i>I</i>? I await the worthier
one; I am not worthy even to succumb by it."</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "What matter about
thyself? Thou art not yet humble enough for me. Humility hath the hardest
skin."—</p>
<p>And I answered: "What hath not the skin of my humility endured! At the
foot of my height do I dwell: how high are my summits, no one hath yet
told me. But well do I know my valleys."</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "O Zarathustra, he who
hath to remove mountains removeth also valleys and plains."—</p>
<p>And I answered: "As yet hath my word not removed mountains, and what I
have spoken hath not reached man. I went, indeed, unto men, but not yet
have I attained unto them."</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "What knowest thou
THEREOF! The dew falleth on the grass when the night is most silent."—</p>
<p>And I answered: "They mocked me when I found and walked in mine own path;
and certainly did my feet then tremble.</p>
<p>And thus did they speak unto me: Thou forgottest the path before, now dost
thou also forget how to walk!"</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "What matter about
their mockery! Thou art one who hast unlearned to obey: now shalt thou
command!</p>
<p>Knowest thou not who is most needed by all? He who commandeth great
things.</p>
<p>To execute great things is difficult: but the more difficult task is to
command great things.</p>
<p>This is thy most unpardonable obstinacy: thou hast the power, and thou
wilt not rule."—</p>
<p>And I answered: "I lack the lion's voice for all commanding."</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me as a whispering: "It is the stillest
words which bring the storm. Thoughts that come with doves' footsteps
guide the world.</p>
<p>O Zarathustra, thou shalt go as a shadow of that which is to come: thus
wilt thou command, and in commanding go foremost."—</p>
<p>And I answered: "I am ashamed."</p>
<p>Then was there again spoken unto me without voice: "Thou must yet become a
child, and be without shame.</p>
<p>The pride of youth is still upon thee; late hast thou become young: but he
who would become a child must surmount even his youth."—</p>
<p>And I considered a long while, and trembled. At last, however, did I say
what I had said at first. "I will not."</p>
<p>Then did a laughing take place all around me. Alas, how that laughing
lacerated my bowels and cut into my heart!</p>
<p>And there was spoken unto me for the last time: "O Zarathustra, thy fruits
are ripe, but thou art not ripe for thy fruits!</p>
<p>So must thou go again into solitude: for thou shalt yet become mellow."—</p>
<p>And again was there a laughing, and it fled: then did it become still
around me, as with a double stillness. I lay, however, on the ground, and
the sweat flowed from my limbs.</p>
<p>—Now have ye heard all, and why I have to return into my solitude.
Nothing have I kept hidden from you, my friends.</p>
<p>But even this have ye heard from me, WHO is still the most reserved of men—and
will be so!</p>
<p>Ah, my friends! I should have something more to say unto you! I should
have something more to give unto you! Why do I not give it? Am I then a
niggard?—</p>
<p>When, however, Zarathustra had spoken these words, the violence of his
pain, and a sense of the nearness of his departure from his friends came
over him, so that he wept aloud; and no one knew how to console him. In
the night, however, he went away alone and left his friends.</p>
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