<h2>FOURTH ACT</h2>
<h3>SCENE</h3>
<p><i>Same as Act II</i>.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>is standing by the
fireplace with his hands in his pockets</i>. <i>He is
looking rather bored</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Pulls out
his watch</i>, <i>inspects it</i>, <i>and rings the
bell</i>.] It is a great nuisance. I can’t find
any one in this house to talk to. And I am full of
interesting information. I feel like the latest edition of
something or other.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter servant</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Sir Robert is still at
the Foreign Office, my lord.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern
not down yet?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Her ladyship has not
yet left her room. Miss Chiltern has just come in from
riding.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>To
himself</i>.] Ah! that is something.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Lord Caversham has
been waiting some time in the library for Sir Robert. I
told him your lordship was here.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thank you!
Would you kindly tell him I’ve gone?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. [<i>Bowing</i>.]
I shall do so, my lord.</p>
<p>[<i>Exit servant</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Really, I
don’t want to meet my father three days running. It
is a great deal too much excitement for any son. I hope to
goodness he won’t come up. Fathers should be neither
seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family
life. Mothers are different. Mothers are
darlings. [<i>Throws himself down into a chair</i>,
<i>picks up a paper and begins to read it</i>.]</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir,
what are you doing here? Wasting your time as usual, I
suppose?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Throws down
paper and rises</i>.] My dear father, when one pays a visit
it is for the purpose of wasting other people’s time, not
one’s own.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Have you been
thinking over what I spoke to you about last night?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I have been
thinking about nothing else.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Engaged to be
married yet?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Genially</i>.] Not yet: but I hope to be before
lunch-time.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
[<i>Caustically</i>.] You can have till dinner-time if it
would be of any convenience to you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thanks awfully,
but I think I’d sooner be engaged before lunch.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Humph!
Never know when you are serious or not.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Neither do I,
father.</p>
<p>[<i>A pause</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I suppose you
have read <i>The Times</i> this morning?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Airily</i>.] The Times? Certainly not. I
only read <i>The Morning Post</i>. All that one should know
about modern life is where the Duchesses are; anything else is
quite demoralising.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Do you mean
to say you have not read <i>The Times</i> leading article on
Robert Chiltern’s career?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good
heavens! No. What does it say?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What should
it say, sir? Everything complimentary, of course.
Chiltern’s speech last night on this Argentine Canal scheme
was one of the finest pieces of oratory ever delivered in the
House since Canning.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! Never
heard of Canning. Never wanted to. And did . . . did
Chiltern uphold the scheme?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Uphold it,
sir? How little you know him! Why, he denounced it
roundly, and the whole system of modern political finance.
This speech is the turning-point in his career, as <i>The
Times</i> points out. You should read this article,
sir. [<i>Opens</i> The Times.] ‘Sir Robert
Chiltern . . . most rising of our young statesmen . . . Brilliant
orator . . . Unblemished career . . . Well-known integrity of
character . . . Represents what is best in English public life .
. . Noble contrast to the lax morality so common among foreign
politicians.’ They will never say that of you,
sir.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I sincerely hope
not, father. However, I am delighted at what you tell me
about Robert, thoroughly delighted. It shows he has got
pluck.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. He has got
more than pluck, sir, he has got genius.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! I prefer
pluck. It is not so common, nowadays, as genius is.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I wish you
would go into Parliament.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear father,
only people who look dull ever get into the House of Commons, and
only people who are dull ever succeed there.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Why
don’t you try to do something useful in life?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am far too
young.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
[<i>Testily</i>.] I hate this affectation of youth,
sir. It is a great deal too prevalent nowadays.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Youth
isn’t an affectation. Youth is an art.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Why
don’t you propose to that pretty Miss Chiltern?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am of a very
nervous disposition, especially in the morning.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I don’t
suppose there is the smallest chance of her accepting you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t
know how the betting stands to-day.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. If she did
accept you she would be the prettiest fool in England.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That is just
what I should like to marry. A thoroughly sensible wife
would reduce me to a condition of absolute idiocy in less than
six months.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You
don’t deserve her, sir.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear father,
if we men married the women we deserved, we should have a very
bad time of it.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! . . . How
do you do, Lord Caversham? I hope Lady Caversham is quite
well?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Lady
Caversham is as usual, as usual.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good morning,
Miss Mabel!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking no
notice at all of</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>,
<i>and addressing herself exclusively to</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] And Lady
Caversham’s bonnets . . . are they at all better?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. They have had
a serious relapse, I am sorry to say.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good morning,
Miss Mabel!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>To</i>
<span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] I hope an
operation will not be necessary.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Smiling
at her pertness</i>.] If it is, we shall have to give Lady
Caversham a narcotic. Otherwise she would never consent to
have a feather touched.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With
increased emphasis</i>.] Good morning, Miss Mabel!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Turning
round with feigned surprise</i>.] Oh, are you here?
Of course you understand that after your breaking your
appointment I am never going to speak to you again.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh, please
don’t say such a thing. You are the one person in
London I really like to have to listen to me.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord Goring,
I never believe a single word that either you or I say to each
other.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You are quite
right, my dear, quite right . . . as far as he is concerned, I
mean.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Do you think
you could possibly make your son behave a little better
occasionally? Just as a change.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I regret to
say, Miss Chiltern, that I have no influence at all over my
son. I wish I had. If I had, I know what I would make
him do.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am afraid
that he has one of those terribly weak natures that are not
susceptible to influence.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. He is very
heartless, very heartless.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It seems to me
that I am a little in the way here.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. It is very
good for you to be in the way, and to know what people say of you
behind your back.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t at
all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It
makes me far too conceited.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. After that,
my dear, I really must bid you good morning.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! I hope
you are not going to leave me all alone with Lord Goring?
Especially at such an early hour in the day.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I am afraid I
can’t take him with me to Downing Street. It is not
the Prime Minster’s day for seeing the unemployed.</p>
<p>[<i>Shakes hands with</i> <span class="smcap">mabel
chiltern</span>, <i>takes up his hat and stick</i>, <i>and goes
out</i>, <i>with a parting glare of indignation at</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Takes up
roses and begins to arrange them in a bowl on the
table</i>.] People who don’t keep their appointments
in the Park are horrid.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Detestable.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am glad you
admit it. But I wish you wouldn’t look so pleased
about it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I can’t
help it. I always look pleased when I am with you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.
[<i>Sadly</i>.] Then I suppose it is my duty to remain with
you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Of course it
is.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Well, my duty
is a thing I never do, on principle. It always depresses
me. So I am afraid I must leave you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Please
don’t, Miss Mabel. I have something very particular
to say to you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.
[<i>Rapturously</i>.] Oh! is it a proposal?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Somewhat
taken aback</i>.] Well, yes, it is—I am bound to say
it is.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a
sigh of pleasure</i>.] I am so glad. That makes the
second to-day.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Indignantly</i>.] The second to-day? What
conceited ass has been impertinent enough to dare to propose to
you before I had proposed to you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Tommy
Trafford, of course. It is one of Tommy’s days for
proposing. He always proposes on Tuesdays and Thursdays,
during the Season.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You didn’t
accept him, I hope?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I make it a
rule never to accept Tommy. That is why he goes on
proposing. Of course, as you didn’t turn up this
morning, I very nearly said yes. It would have been an
excellent lesson both for him and for you if I had. It
would have taught you both better manners.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! bother Tommy
Trafford. Tommy is a silly little ass. I love
you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I know.
And I think you might have mentioned it before. I am sure I
have given you heaps of opportunities.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mabel, do be
serious. Please be serious.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Ah! that is
the sort of thing a man always says to a girl before he has been
married to her. He never says it afterwards.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking hold
of her hand</i>.] Mabel, I have told you that I love
you. Can’t you love me a little in return?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You silly
Arthur! If you knew anything about . . . anything, which
you don’t, you would know that I adore you. Every one
in London knows it except you. It is a public scandal the
way I adore you. I have been going about for the last six
months telling the whole of society that I adore you. I
wonder you consent to have anything to say to me. I have no
character left at all. At least, I feel so happy that I am
quite sure I have no character left at all.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Catches her
in his arms and kisses her</i>. <i>Then there is a pause of
bliss</i>.] Dear! Do you know I was awfully afraid of
being refused!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking
up at him</i>.] But you never have been refused yet by
anybody, have you, Arthur? I can’t imagine any one
refusing you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After
kissing her again</i>.] Of course I’m not nearly good
enough for you, Mabel.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Nestling
close to him</i>.] I am so glad, darling. I was
afraid you were.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some
hesitation</i>.] And I’m . . . I’m a little
over thirty.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Dear, you
look weeks younger than that.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Enthusiastically</i>.] How sweet of you to say so! . .
. And it is only fair to tell you frankly that I am fearfully
extravagant.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. But so am I,
Arthur. So we’re sure to agree. And now I must
go and see Gertrude.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Must you
really? [<i>Kisses her</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then do tell her
I want to talk to her particularly. I have been waiting
here all the morning to see either her or Robert.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Do you mean
to say you didn’t come here expressly to propose to me?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Triumphantly</i>.] No; that was a flash of genius.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Your
first.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With
determination</i>.] My last.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am
delighted to hear it. Now don’t stir.
I’ll be back in five minutes. And don’t fall
into any temptations while I am away.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Dear Mabel,
while you are away, there are none. It makes me horribly
dependent on you.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good morning,
dear! How pretty you are looking!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How pale you
are looking, Gertrude! It is most becoming!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good morning,
Lord Goring!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Bowing</i>.] Good morning, Lady Chiltern!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Aside
to</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] I shall be
in the conservatory under the second palm tree on the left.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Second on the
left?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a
look of mock surprise</i>.] Yes; the usual palm tree.</p>
<p>[<i>Blows a kiss to him</i>, <i>unobserved by</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>, <i>and goes out</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern, I
have a certain amount of very good news to tell you. Mrs.
Cheveley gave me up Robert’s letter last night, and I
burned it. Robert is safe.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Sinking on
the sofa</i>.] Safe! Oh! I am so glad of that.
What a good friend you are to him—to us!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. There is only
one person now that could be said to be in any danger.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Who is
that?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Sitting down
beside her</i>.] Yourself.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I? In
danger? What do you mean?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Danger is too
great a word. It is a word I should not have used.
But I admit I have something to tell you that may distress you,
that terribly distresses me. Yesterday evening you wrote me
a very beautiful, womanly letter, asking me for my help.
You wrote to me as one of your oldest friends, one of your
husband’s oldest friends. Mrs. Cheveley stole that
letter from my rooms.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Well, what use
is it to her? Why should she not have it?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Rising</i>.] Lady Chiltern, I will be quite frank with
you. Mrs. Cheveley puts a certain construction on that
letter and proposes to send it to your husband.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. But what
construction could she put on it? . . . Oh! not that! not
that! If I in—in trouble, and wanting your help,
trusting you, propose to come to you . . . that you may advise me
. . . assist me . . . Oh! are there women so horrible as that . .
.? And she proposes to send it to my husband? Tell me
what happened. Tell me all that happened.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mrs. Cheveley
was concealed in a room adjoining my library, without my
knowledge. I thought that the person who was waiting in
that room to see me was yourself. Robert came in
unexpectedly. A chair or something fell in the room.
He forced his way in, and he discovered her. We had a
terrible scene. I still thought it was you. He left
me in anger. At the end of everything Mrs. Cheveley got
possession of your letter—she stole it, when or how, I
don’t know.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. At what hour
did this happen?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. At half-past
ten. And now I propose that we tell Robert the whole thing
at once.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking at
him with amazement that is almost terror</i>.] You want me
to tell Robert that the woman you expected was not Mrs. Cheveley,
but myself? That it was I whom you thought was concealed in
a room in your house, at half-past ten o’clock at
night? You want me to tell him that?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I think it is
better that he should know the exact truth.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.
[<i>Rising</i>.] Oh, I couldn’t, I
couldn’t!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. May I do it?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.
[<i>Gravely</i>.] You are wrong, Lady Chiltern.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No. The
letter must be intercepted. That is all. But how can
I do it? Letters arrive for him every moment of the
day. His secretaries open them and hand them to him.
I dare not ask the servants to bring me his letters. It
would be impossible. Oh! why don’t you tell me what
to do?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Pray be calm,
Lady Chiltern, and answer the questions I am going to put to
you. You said his secretaries open his letters.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Who is with him
to-day? Mr. Trafford, isn’t it?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No. Mr.
Montford, I think.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You can trust
him?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With a
gesture of despair</i>.] Oh! how do I know?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. He would do what
you asked him, wouldn’t he?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I think
so.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Your letter was
on pink paper. He could recognise it without reading it,
couldn’t he? By the colour?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I suppose
so.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Is he in the
house now?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then I will go
and see him myself, and tell him that a certain letter, written
on pink paper, is to be forwarded to Robert to-day, and that at
all costs it must not reach him. [<i>Goes to the door</i>,
<i>and opens it</i>.] Oh! Robert is coming upstairs with
the letter in his hand. It has reached him already.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With a cry
of pain</i>.] Oh! you have saved his life; what have you
done with mine?</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert
chiltern</span>. <i>He has the letter in his hand</i>,
<i>and is reading it</i>. <i>He comes towards his wife</i>,
<i>not noticing</i> <span class="smcap">lord
goring’s</span> <i>presence</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. ‘I
want you. I trust you. I am coming to you.
Gertrude.’ Oh, my love! Is this true? Do
you indeed trust me, and want me? If so, it was for me to
come to you, not for you to write of coming to me. This
letter of yours, Gertrude, makes me feel that nothing that the
world may do can hurt me now. You want me, Gertrude?</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>, <i>unseen by</i>
<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>, <i>makes an
imploring sign to</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>
<i>to accept the situation and</i> <span class="smcap">sir
robert’s</span> <i>error</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You
trust me, Gertrude?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Ah! why
did you not add you loved me?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking his
hand</i>.] Because I loved you.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>passes into the
conservatory</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Kisses her</i>.] Gertrude, you don’t know what I
feel. When Montford passed me your letter across the
table—he had opened it by mistake, I suppose, without
looking at the handwriting on the envelope—and I read
it—oh! I did not care what disgrace or punishment was in
store for me, I only thought you loved me still.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. There is no
disgrace in store for you, nor any public shame. Mrs.
Cheveley has handed over to Lord Goring the document that was in
her possession, and he has destroyed it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Are you
sure of this, Gertrude?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes; Lord
Goring has just told me.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Then I
am safe! Oh! what a wonderful thing to be safe! For
two days I have been in terror. I am safe now. How
did Arthur destroy my letter? Tell me.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. He burned
it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I wish I
had seen that one sin of my youth burning to ashes. How
many men there are in modern life who would like to see their
past burning to white ashes before them! Is Arthur still
here?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes; he is in
the conservatory.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am so
glad now I made that speech last night in the House, so
glad. I made it thinking that public disgrace might be the
result. But it has not been so.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Public honour
has been the result.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I think
so. I fear so, almost. For although I am safe from
detection, although every proof against me is destroyed, I
suppose, Gertrude . . . I suppose I should retire from public
life? [<i>He looks anxiously at his wife</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.
[<i>Eagerly</i>.] Oh yes, Robert, you should do that.
It is your duty to do that.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It is
much to surrender.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No; it will be
much to gain.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>walks up
and down the room with a troubled expression</i>. <i>Then
comes over to his wife</i>, <i>and puts his hand on her
shoulder</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And you
would be happy living somewhere alone with me, abroad perhaps, or
in the country away from London, away from public life? You
would have no regrets?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh! none,
Robert.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Sadly</i>.] And your ambition for me? You used to
be ambitious for me.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh, my
ambition! I have none now, but that we two may love each
other. It was your ambition that led you astray. Let
us not talk about ambition.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>returns from the
conservatory</i>, <i>looking very pleased with himself</i>,
<i>and with an entirely new buttonhole that some one has made for
him</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Going towards him</i>.] Arthur, I have to thank you for
what you have done for me. I don’t know how I can
repay you. [<i>Shakes hands with him</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear fellow,
I’ll tell you at once. At the present moment, under
the usual palm tree . . . I mean in the conservatory . . .</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Lord Caversham.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That admirable
father of mine really makes a habit of turning up at the wrong
moment. It is very heartless of him, very heartless
indeed.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
<span class="smcap">mason</span> <i>goes out</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Good morning,
Lady Chiltern! Warmest congratulations to you, Chiltern, on
your brilliant speech last night. I have just left the
Prime Minister, and you are to have the vacant seat in the
Cabinet.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With
a look of joy and triumph</i>.] A seat in the Cabinet?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Yes; here is
the Prime Minister’s letter. [<i>Hands
letter</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Takes letter and reads it</i>.] A seat in the
Cabinet!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Certainly,
and you well deserve it too. You have got what we want so
much in political life nowadays—high character, high moral
tone, high principles. [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord
goring</span>.] Everything that you have not got, sir, and
never will have.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t
like principles, father. I prefer prejudices.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>is on the
brink of accepting the Prime Minister’s offer</i>, <i>when
he sees wife looking at him with her clear</i>, <i>candid
eyes</i>. <i>He then realises that it is
impossible</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I cannot
accept this offer, Lord Caversham. I have made up my mind
to decline it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Decline it,
sir!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My
intention is to retire at once from public life.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
[<i>Angrily</i>.] Decline a seat in the Cabinet, and retire
from public life? Never heard such damned nonsense in the
whole course of my existence. I beg your pardon, Lady
Chiltern. Chiltern, I beg your pardon. [<i>To</i>
<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] Don’t grin
like that, sir.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Lady
Chiltern, you are a sensible woman, the most sensible woman in
London, the most sensible woman I know. Will you kindly
prevent your husband from making such a . . . from taking such .
. . Will you kindly do that, Lady Chiltern?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I think my
husband in right in his determination, Lord Caversham. I
approve of it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You approve
of it? Good heavens!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking her
husband’s hand</i>.] I admire him for it. I
admire him immensely for it. I have never admired him so
much before. He is finer than even I thought him.
[<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.]
You will go and write your letter to the Prime Minister now,
won’t you? Don’t hesitate about it, Robert.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With
a touch of bitterness</i>.] I suppose I had better write it
at once. Such offers are not repeated. I will ask you
to excuse me for a moment, Lord Caversham.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I may come
with you, Robert, may I not?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes,
Gertrude.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>goes out with
him</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What is the
matter with this family? Something wrong here, eh?
[<i>Tapping his forehead</i>.] Idiocy? Hereditary, I
suppose. Both of them, too. Wife as well as
husband. Very sad. Very sad indeed! And they
are not an old family. Can’t understand it.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is not
idiocy, father, I assure you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What is it
then, sir?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some
hesitation</i>.] Well, it is what is called nowadays a high
moral tone, father. That is all.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Hate these
new-fangled names. Same thing as we used to call idiocy
fifty years ago. Shan’t stay in this house any
longer.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking his
arm</i>.] Oh! just go in here for a moment, father.
Third palm tree to the left, the usual palm tree.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What,
sir?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I beg your
pardon, father, I forgot. The conservatory, father, the
conservatory—there is some one there I want you to talk
to.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What about,
sir?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. About me,
father,</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
[<i>Grimly</i>.] Not a subject on which much eloquence is
possible.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father; but
the lady is like me. She doesn’t care much for
eloquence in others. She thinks it a little loud.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">lord caversham</span> <i>goes out into
the conservatory</i>. <span class="smcap">lady
chiltern</span> <i>enters</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern,
why are you playing Mrs. Cheveley’s cards?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.
[<i>Startled</i>.] I don’t understand you.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mrs. Cheveley
made an attempt to ruin your husband. Either to drive him
from public life, or to make him adopt a dishonourable
position. From the latter tragedy you saved him. The
former you are now thrusting on him. Why should you do him
the wrong Mrs. Cheveley tried to do and failed?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Lord
Goring?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Pulling
himself together for a great effort</i>, <i>and showing the
philosopher that underlies the dandy</i>.] Lady Chiltern,
allow me. You wrote me a letter last night in which you
said you trusted me and wanted my help. Now is the moment
when you really want my help, now is the time when you have got
to trust me, to trust in my counsel and judgment. You love
Robert. Do you want to kill his love for you? What
sort of existence will he have if you rob him of the fruits of
his ambition, if you take him from the splendour of a great
political career, if you close the doors of public life against
him, if you condemn him to sterile failure, he who was made for
triumph and success? Women are not meant to judge us, but
to forgive us when we need forgiveness. Pardon, not
punishment, is their mission. Why should you scourge him
with rods for a sin done in his youth, before he knew you, before
he knew himself? A man’s life is of more value than a
woman’s. It has larger issues, wider scope, greater
ambitions. A woman’s life revolves in curves of
emotions. It is upon lines of intellect that a man’s
life progresses. Don’t make any terrible mistake,
Lady Chiltern. A woman who can keep a man’s love, and
love him in return, has done all the world wants of women, or
should want of them.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Troubled
and hesitating</i>.] But it is my husband himself who
wishes to retire from public life. He feels it is his
duty. It was he who first said so.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Rather than lose
your love, Robert would do anything, wreck his whole career, as
he is on the brink of doing now. He is making for you a
terrible sacrifice. Take my advice, Lady Chiltern, and do
not accept a sacrifice so great. If you do, you will live
to repent it bitterly. We men and women are not made to
accept such sacrifices from each other. We are not worthy
of them. Besides, Robert has been punished enough.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. We have both
been punished. I set him up too high.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With deep
feeling in his voice</i>.] Do not for that reason set him
down now too low. If he has fallen from his altar, do not
thrust him into the mire. Failure to Robert would be the
very mire of shame. Power is his passion. He would
lose everything, even his power to feel love. Your
husband’s life is at this moment in your hands, your
husband’s love is in your hands. Don’t mar both
for him.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert
chiltern</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
Gertrude, here is the draft of my letter. Shall I read it
to you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Let me see
it.</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert</span> <i>hands her the
letter</i>. <i>She reads it</i>, <i>and then</i>, <i>with a
gesture of passion</i>, <i>tears it up</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What are
you doing?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. A man’s
life is of more value than a woman’s. It has larger
issues, wider scope, greater ambitions. Our lives revolve
in curves of emotions. It is upon lines of intellect that a
man’s life progresses. I have just learnt this, and
much else with it, from Lord Goring. And I will not spoil
your life for you, nor see you spoil it as a sacrifice to me, a
useless sacrifice!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
Gertrude! Gertrude!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You can
forget. Men easily forget. And I forgive. That
is how women help the world. I see that now.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Deeply overcome by emotion</i>, <i>embraces her</i>.]
My wife! my wife! [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord
goring</span>.] Arthur, it seems that I am always to be in
your debt.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh dear no,
Robert. Your debt is to Lady Chiltern, not to me!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I owe
you much. And now tell me what you were going to ask me
just now as Lord Caversham came in.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, you are
your sister’s guardian, and I want your consent to my
marriage with her. That is all.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh, I am so
glad! I am so glad! [<i>Shakes hands with</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thank you, Lady
Chiltern.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With
a troubled look</i>.] My sister to be your wife?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Speaking with great firmness</i>.] Arthur, I am very
sorry, but the thing is quite out of the question. I have
to think of Mabel’s future happiness. And I
don’t think her happiness would be safe in your
hands. And I cannot have her sacrificed!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Sacrificed!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes,
utterly sacrificed. Loveless marriages are horrible.
But there is one thing worse than an absolutely loveless
marriage. A marriage in which there is love, but on one
side only; faith, but on one side only; devotion, but on one side
only, and in which of the two hearts one is sure to be
broken.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. But I love
Mabel. No other woman has any place in my life.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, if
they love each other, why should they not be married?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur
cannot bring Mabel the love that she deserves.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What reason have
you for saying that?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>After a pause</i>.] Do you really require me to tell
you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly I
do.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. As you
choose. When I called on you yesterday evening I found Mrs.
Cheveley concealed in your rooms. It was between ten and
eleven o’clock at night. I do not wish to say
anything more. Your relations with Mrs. Cheveley have, as I
said to you last night, nothing whatsoever to do with me. I
know you were engaged to be married to her once. The
fascination she exercised over you then seems to have
returned. You spoke to me last night of her as of a woman
pure and stainless, a woman whom you respected and
honoured. That may be so. But I cannot give my
sister’s life into your hands. It would be wrong of
me. It would be unjust, infamously unjust to her.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I have nothing
more to say.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, it was
not Mrs. Cheveley whom Lord Goring expected last night.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Not Mrs.
Cheveley! Who was it then?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady
Chiltern!</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It was your
own wife. Robert, yesterday afternoon Lord Goring told me
that if ever I was in trouble I could come to him for help, as he
was our oldest and best friend. Later on, after that
terrible scene in this room, I wrote to him telling him that I
trusted him, that I had need of him, that I was coming to him for
help and advice. [<span class="smcap">sir robert
chiltern</span> <i>takes the letter out of his pocket</i>.]
Yes, that letter. I didn’t go to Lord Goring’s,
after all. I felt that it is from ourselves alone that help
can come. Pride made me think that. Mrs. Cheveley
went. She stole my letter and sent it anonymously to you
this morning, that you should think . . . Oh! Robert, I cannot
tell you what she wished you to think. . . .</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
What! Had I fallen so low in your eyes that you thought
that even for a moment I could have doubted your goodness?
Gertrude, Gertrude, you are to me the white image of all good
things, and sin can never touch you. Arthur, you can go to
Mabel, and you have my best wishes! Oh! stop a
moment. There is no name at the beginning of this
letter. The brilliant Mrs. Cheveley does not seem to have
noticed that. There should be a name.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Let me write
yours. It is you I trust and need. You and none
else.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, really,
Lady Chiltern, I think I should have back my own letter.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.
[<i>Smiling</i>.] No; you shall have Mabel. [<i>Takes
the letter and writes her husband’s name on it</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, I hope she
hasn’t changed her mind. It’s nearly twenty
minutes since I saw her last.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>
<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord Goring,
I think your father’s conversation much more improving than
yours. I am only going to talk to Lord Caversham in the
future, and always under the usual palm tree.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Darling!
[<i>Kisses her</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.
[<i>Considerably taken aback</i>.] What does this mean,
sir? You don’t mean to say that this charming, clever
young lady has been so foolish as to accept you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly,
father! And Chiltern’s been wise enough to accept the
seat in the Cabinet.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I am very
glad to hear that, Chiltern . . . I congratulate you, sir.
If the country doesn’t go to the dogs or the Radicals, we
shall have you Prime Minister, some day.</p>
<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Luncheon is on the
table, my Lady!</p>
<p>[<span class="smcap">mason</span> <i>goes out</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You’ll
stop to luncheon, Lord Caversham, won’t you?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. With
pleasure, and I’ll drive you down to Downing Street
afterwards, Chiltern. You have a great future before you, a
great future. Wish I could say the same for you, sir.
[<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] But
your career will have to be entirely domestic.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes, father, I
prefer it domestic.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. And if you
don’t make this young lady an ideal husband, I’ll cut
you off with a shilling.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. An ideal
husband! Oh, I don’t think I should like that.
It sounds like something in the next world.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What do you
want him to be then, dear?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. He can be
what he chooses. All I want is to be . . . to be . . . oh!
a real wife to him.</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Upon my word,
there is a good deal of common sense in that, Lady Chiltern.</p>
<p>[<i>They all go out except</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert
chiltern</span>. <i>He sinks in a chair</i>, <i>wrapt in
thought</i>. <i>After a little time</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>returns to look for
him</i>.]</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Leaning
over the back of the chair</i>.] Aren’t you coming
in, Robert?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.
[<i>Taking her hand</i>.] Gertrude, is it love you feel for
me, or is it pity merely?</p>
<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Kisses
him</i>.] It is love, Robert. Love, and only
love. For both of us a new life is beginning.</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Curtain</span></p>
<div class="gapspace"> </div>
<div class="gapshortline"> </div>
<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">the
northumberland press</span>, <span class="smcap">newcastle-upon-tyne</span></p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />