<h2><SPAN name="chap08"></SPAN>THE CACTUS</h2>
<p>The most notable thing about Time is that it is so purely relative. A large
amount of reminiscence is, by common consent, conceded to the drowning man; and
it is not past belief that one may review an entire courtship while removing
one’s gloves.</p>
<p>That is what Trysdale was doing, standing by a table in his bachelor
apartments. On the table stood a singular-looking green plant in a red earthen
jar. The plant was one of the species of cacti, and was provided with long,
tentacular leaves that perpetually swayed with the slightest breeze with a
peculiar beckoning motion.</p>
<p>Trysdale’s friend, the brother of the bride, stood at a sideboard
complaining at being allowed to drink alone. Both men were in evening dress.
White favors like stars upon their coats shone through the gloom of the
apartment.</p>
<p>As he slowly unbuttoned his gloves, there passed through Trysdale’s mind
a swift, scarifying retrospect of the last few hours. It seemed that in his
nostrils was still the scent of the flowers that had been banked in odorous
masses about the church, and in his ears the lowpitched hum of a thousand
well-bred voices, the rustle of crisp garments, and, most insistently
recurring, the drawling words of the minister irrevocably binding her to
another.</p>
<p>From this last hopeless point of view he still strove, as if it had become a
habit of his mind, to reach some conjecture as to why and how he had lost her.
Shaken rudely by the uncompromising fact, he had suddenly found himself
confronted by a thing he had never before faced—his own innermost,
unmitigated, arid unbedecked self. He saw all the garbs of pretence and egoism
that he had worn now turn to rags of folly. He shuddered at the thought that to
others, before now, the garments of his soul must have appeared sorry and
threadbare. Vanity and conceit? These were the joints in his armor. And how
free from either she had always been—But why—</p>
<p>As she had slowly moved up the aisle toward the altar he had felt an unworthy,
sullen exultation that had served to support him. He had told himself that her
paleness was from thoughts of another than the man to whom she was about to
give herself. But even that poor consolation had been wrenched from him. For,
when he saw that swift, limpid, upward look that she gave the man when he took
her hand, he knew himself to be forgotten. Once that same look had been raised
to him, and he had gauged its meaning. Indeed, his conceit had crumbled; its
last prop was gone. Why had it ended thus? There had been no quarrel between
them, nothing—</p>
<p>For the thousandth time he remarshalled in his mind the events of those last
few days before the tide had so suddenly turned.</p>
<p>She had always insisted upon placing him upon a pedestal, and he had accepted
her homage with royal grandeur. It had been a very sweet incense that she had
burned before him; so modest (he told himself); so childlike and worshipful,
and (he would once have sworn) so sincere. She had invested him with an almost
supernatural number of high attributes and excellencies and talents, and he had
absorbed the oblation as a desert drinks the rain that can coax from it no
promise of blossom or fruit.</p>
<p>As Trysdale grimly wrenched apart the seam of his last glove, the crowning
instance of his fatuous and tardily mourned egoism came vividly back to him.
The scene was the night when he had asked her to come up on his pedestal with
him and share his greatness. He could not, now, for the pain of it, allow his
mind to dwell upon the memory of her convincing beauty that night—the
careless wave of her hair, the tenderness and virginal charm of her looks and
words. But they had been enough, and they had brought him to speak. During
their conversation she had said:</p>
<p>“And Captain Carruthers tells me that you speak the Spanish language like
a native. Why have you hidden this accomplishment from me? Is there anything
you do not know?”</p>
<p>Now, Carruthers was an idiot. No doubt he (Trysdale) had been guilty (he
sometimes did such things) of airing at the club some old, canting Castilian
proverb dug from the hotchpotch at the back of dictionaries. Carruthers, who
was one of his incontinent admirers, was the very man to have magnified this
exhibition of doubtful erudition.</p>
<p>But, alas! the incense of her admiration had been so sweet and flattering. He
allowed the imputation to pass without denial. Without protest, he allowed her
to twine about his brow this spurious bay of Spanish scholarship. He let it
grace his conquering head, and, among its soft convolutions, he did not feel
the prick of the thorn that was to pierce him later.</p>
<p>How glad, how shy, how tremulous she was! How she fluttered like a snared bird
when he laid his mightiness at her feet! He could have sworn, and he could
swear now, that unmistakable consent was in her eyes, but, coyly, she would
give him no direct answer. “I will send you my answer to-morrow,”
she said; and he, the indulgent, confident victor, smilingly granted the delay.
The next day he waited, impatient, in his rooms for the word. At noon her groom
came to the door and left the strange cactus in the red earthen jar. There was
no note, no message, merely a tag upon the plant bearing a barbarous foreign or
botanical name. He waited until night, but her answer did not come. His large
pride and hurt vanity kept him from seeking her. Two evenings later they met at
a dinner. Their greetings were conventional, but she looked at him, breathless,
wondering, eager. He was courteous, adamant, waiting her explanation. With
womanly swiftness she took her cue from his manner, and turned to snow and ice.
Thus, and wider from this on, they had drifted apart. Where was his fault? Who
had been to blame? Humbled now, he sought the answer amid the ruins of his
self-conceit. If—</p>
<p>The voice of the other man in the room, querulously intruding upon his
thoughts, aroused him.</p>
<p>“I say, Trysdale, what the deuce is the matter with you? You look unhappy
as if you yourself had been married instead of having acted merely as an
accomplice. Look at me, another accessory, come two thousand miles on a
garlicky, cockroachy banana steamer all the way from South America to connive
at the sacrifice—please to observe how lightly my guilt rests upon my
shoulders. Only little sister I had, too, and now she’s gone. Come now!
take something to ease your conscience.”</p>
<p>“I don’t drink just now, thanks,” said Trysdale.</p>
<p>“Your brandy,” resumed the other, coming over and joining him,
“is abominable. Run down to see me some time at Punta Redonda, and try
some of our stuff that old Garcia smuggles in. It’s worth the trip.
Hallo! here’s an old acquaintance. Wherever did you rake up this cactus,
Trysdale?”</p>
<p>“A present,” said Trysdale, “from a friend. Know the
species?”</p>
<p>“Very well. It’s a tropical concern. See hundreds of ’em
around Punta every day. Here’s the name on this tag tied to it. Know any
Spanish, Trysdale?”</p>
<p>“No,” said Trysdale, with the bitter wraith of a
smile—“Is it Spanish?”</p>
<p>“Yes. The natives imagine the leaves are reaching out and beckoning to
you. They call it by this name—Ventomarme. Name means in English,
‘Come and take me.’”</p>
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