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<h2 class="tei tei-head" style="text-align: left; margin-bottom: 2.88em; margin-top: 2.88em"><span style="font-size: 144%">Book XI. Ivan</span></h2>
<div class="tei tei-div" style="margin-bottom: 3.00em; margin-top: 3.00em">
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<h3 class="tei tei-head" style="text-align: left; margin-bottom: 2.40em; margin-top: 2.40em"><span style="font-size: 120%">Chapter I. At Grushenka's</span></h3>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Alyosha went towards the cathedral square to the widow
Morozov's house to see Grushenka, who had sent Fenya to him
early in the morning with an urgent message begging him to come.
Questioning Fenya, Alyosha learned that her mistress had been particularly
distressed since the previous day. During the two months
that had passed since Mitya's arrest, Alyosha had called frequently
at the widow Morozov's house, both from his own inclination and
to take messages for Mitya. Three days after Mitya's arrest,
Grushenka was taken very ill and was ill for nearly five weeks. For
one whole week she was unconscious. She was very much changed—thinner
and a little sallow, though she had for the past fortnight
been well enough to go out. But to Alyosha her face was even
more attractive than before, and he liked to meet her eyes when he
went in to her. A look of firmness and intelligent purpose had
developed in her face. There were signs of a spiritual transformation
in her, and a steadfast, fine and humble determination that nothing
could shake could be discerned in her. There was a small vertical
line between her brows which gave her charming face a look of concentrated
thought, almost austere at the first glance. There was
scarcely a trace of her former frivolity.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
It seemed strange to Alyosha, too, that in spite of the calamity
that had overtaken the poor girl, betrothed to a man who had been
arrested for a terrible crime, almost at the instant of their betrothal,
in spite of her illness and the almost inevitable sentence hanging
over Mitya, Grushenka had not yet lost her youthful cheerfulness.
There was a soft light in the once proud eyes, though at times they
gleamed with the old vindictive fire when she was visited by one
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page635"></span><SPAN name="Pg635" id="Pg635" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
disturbing thought stronger than ever in her heart. The object of
that uneasiness was the same as ever—Katerina Ivanovna, of whom
Grushenka had even raved when she lay in delirium. Alyosha knew
that she was fearfully jealous of her. Yet Katerina Ivanovna had
not once visited Mitya in his prison, though she might have done it
whenever she liked. All this made a difficult problem for Alyosha,
for he was the only person to whom Grushenka opened her heart
and from whom she was continually asking advice. Sometimes he
was unable to say anything.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Full of anxiety he entered her lodging. She was at home. She
had returned from seeing Mitya half an hour before, and from the
rapid movement with which she leapt up from her chair to meet
him he saw that she had been expecting him with great impatience.
A pack of cards dealt for a game of <span class="tei tei-q">“fools”</span> lay on the table. A bed
had been made up on the leather sofa on the other side and Maximov
lay, half-reclining, on it. He wore a dressing-gown and a cotton
nightcap, and was evidently ill and weak, though he was smiling
blissfully. When the homeless old man returned with Grushenka
from Mokroe two months before, he had simply stayed on and was
still staying with her. He arrived with her in rain and sleet, sat
down on the sofa, drenched and scared, and gazed mutely at her
with a timid, appealing smile. Grushenka, who was in terrible
grief and in the first stage of fever, almost forgot his existence in
all she had to do the first half-hour after her arrival. Suddenly she
chanced to look at him intently: he laughed a pitiful, helpless little
laugh. She called Fenya and told her to give him something to eat.
All that day he sat in the same place, almost without stirring. When
it got dark and the shutters were closed, Fenya asked her mistress:</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Is the gentleman going to stay the night, mistress?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes; make him a bed on the sofa,”</span> answered Grushenka.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Questioning him more in detail, Grushenka learned from him that
he had literally nowhere to go, and that <span class="tei tei-q">“Mr. Kalganov, my benefactor,
told me straight that he wouldn't receive me again and gave
me five roubles.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Well, God bless you, you'd better stay, then,”</span> Grushenka decided
in her grief, smiling compassionately at him. Her smile
wrung the old man's heart and his lips twitched with grateful tears.
And so the destitute wanderer had stayed with her ever since. He
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page636"></span><SPAN name="Pg636" id="Pg636" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
did not leave the house even when she was ill. Fenya and her grandmother,
the cook, did not turn him out, but went on serving him
meals and making up his bed on the sofa. Grushenka had grown used
to him, and coming back from seeing Mitya (whom she had begun
to visit in prison before she was really well) she would sit down and
begin talking to <span class="tei tei-q">“Maximushka”</span> about trifling matters, to keep her
from thinking of her sorrow. The old man turned out to be a good
story-teller on occasions, so that at last he became necessary to her.
Grushenka saw scarcely any one else beside Alyosha, who did not
come every day and never stayed long. Her old merchant lay
seriously ill at this time, <span class="tei tei-q">“at his last gasp”</span> as they said in the town,
and he did, in fact, die a week after Mitya's trial. Three weeks
before his death, feeling the end approaching, he made his sons,
their wives and children, come upstairs to him at last and bade
them not leave him again. From that moment he gave strict orders
to his servants not to admit Grushenka and to tell her if she came,
<span class="tei tei-q">“The master wishes you long life and happiness and tells you to
forget him.”</span> But Grushenka sent almost every day to inquire after
him.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“You've come at last!”</span> she cried, flinging down the cards and
joyfully greeting Alyosha, <span class="tei tei-q">“and Maximushka's been scaring me that
perhaps you wouldn't come. Ah, how I need you! Sit down to the
table. What will you have—coffee?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, please,”</span> said Alyosha, sitting down at the table. <span class="tei tei-q">“I am
very hungry.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“That's right. Fenya, Fenya, coffee,”</span> cried Grushenka. <span class="tei tei-q">“It's
been made a long time ready for you. And bring some little pies,
and mind they are hot. Do you know, we've had a storm over those
pies to-day. I took them to the prison for him, and would you believe
it, he threw them back to me: he would not eat them. He
flung one of them on the floor and stamped on it. So I said to him:
<span class="tei tei-q">‘I shall leave them with the warder; if you don't eat them before
evening, it will be that your venomous spite is enough for you!’</span>
With that I went away. We quarreled again, would you believe
it? Whenever I go we quarrel.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Grushenka said all this in one breath in her agitation. Maximov,
feeling nervous, at once smiled and looked on the floor.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“What did you quarrel about this time?”</span> asked Alyosha.</p>
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page637"></span><SPAN name="Pg637" id="Pg637" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I didn't expect it in the least. Only fancy, he is jealous of the
Pole. <span class="tei tei-q">‘Why are you keeping him?’</span> he said. <span class="tei tei-q">‘So you've begun keeping
him.’</span> He is jealous, jealous of me all the time, jealous eating
and sleeping! He even took it into his head to be jealous of Kuzma
last week.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“But he knew about the Pole before?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, but there it is. He has known about him from the very
beginning, but to-day he suddenly got up and began scolding about
him. I am ashamed to repeat what he said. Silly fellow! Rakitin
went in as I came out. Perhaps Rakitin is egging him on. What
do you think?”</span> she added carelessly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“He loves you, that's what it is: he loves you so much. And now
he is particularly worried.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I should think he might be, with the trial to-morrow. And I
went to him to say something about to-morrow, for I dread to think
what's going to happen then. You say that he is worried, but how
worried I am! And he talks about the Pole! He's too silly! He
is not jealous of Maximushka yet, anyway.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“My wife was dreadfully jealous over me, too,”</span> Maximov put in
his word.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Jealous of you?”</span> Grushenka laughed in spite of herself. <span class="tei tei-q">“Of
whom could she have been jealous?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Of the servant girls.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Hold your tongue, Maximushka, I am in no laughing mood now;
I feel angry. Don't ogle the pies. I shan't give you any; they are
not good for you, and I won't give you any vodka either. I have
to look after him, too, just as though I kept an almshouse,”</span> she
laughed.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I don't deserve your kindness. I am a worthless creature,”</span> said
Maximov, with tears in his voice. <span class="tei tei-q">“You would do better to spend
your kindness on people of more use than me.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Ech, every one is of use, Maximushka, and how can we tell
who's of most use? If only that Pole didn't exist, Alyosha. He's
taken it into his head to fall ill, too, to-day. I've been to see him
also. And I shall send him some pies, too, on purpose. I hadn't
sent him any, but Mitya accused me of it, so now I shall send some!
Ah, here's Fenya with a letter! Yes, it's from the Poles—begging
again!”</span></p>
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page638"></span><SPAN name="Pg638" id="Pg638" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Pan Mussyalovitch had indeed sent an extremely long and characteristically
eloquent letter in which he begged her to lend him
three roubles. In the letter was enclosed a receipt for the sum,
with a promise to repay it within three months, signed by Pan
Vrublevsky as well. Grushenka had received many such letters, accompanied
by such receipts, from her former lover during the fortnight
of her convalescence. But she knew that the two Poles had
been to ask after her health during her illness. The first letter
Grushenka got from them was a long one, written on large notepaper
and with a big family crest on the seal. It was so obscure and
rhetorical that Grushenka put it down before she had read half,
unable to make head or tail of it. She could not attend to letters
then. The first letter was followed next day by another in which
Pan Mussyalovitch begged her for a loan of two thousand roubles
for a very short period. Grushenka left that letter, too, unanswered.
A whole series of letters had followed—one every day—all as
pompous and rhetorical, but the loan asked for, gradually diminishing,
dropped to a hundred roubles, then to twenty-five, to ten, and
finally Grushenka received a letter in which both the Poles begged
her for only one rouble and included a receipt signed by both.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Then Grushenka suddenly felt sorry for them, and at dusk she
went round herself to their lodging. She found the two Poles in
great poverty, almost destitution, without food or fuel, without
cigarettes, in debt to their landlady. The two hundred roubles they
had carried off from Mitya at Mokroe had soon disappeared. But
Grushenka was surprised at their meeting her with arrogant dignity
and self-assertion, with the greatest punctilio and pompous speeches.
Grushenka simply laughed, and gave her former admirer ten roubles.
Then, laughing, she told Mitya of it and he was not in the least
jealous. But ever since, the Poles had attached themselves to
Grushenka and bombarded her daily with requests for money and
she had always sent them small sums. And now that day Mitya
had taken it into his head to be fearfully jealous.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Like a fool, I went round to him just for a minute, on the way
to see Mitya, for he is ill, too, my Pole,”</span> Grushenka began again with
nervous haste. <span class="tei tei-q">“I was laughing, telling Mitya about it. <span class="tei tei-q">‘Fancy,’</span>
I said, <span class="tei tei-q">‘my Pole had the happy thought to sing his old songs to me
to the guitar. He thought I would be touched and marry him!’</span>
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page639"></span><SPAN name="Pg639" id="Pg639" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
Mitya leapt up swearing.... So, there, I'll send them the pies!
Fenya, is it that little girl they've sent? Here, give her three roubles
and pack a dozen pies up in a paper and tell her to take them. And
you, Alyosha, be sure to tell Mitya that I did send them the pies.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I wouldn't tell him for anything,”</span> said Alyosha, smiling.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Ech! You think he is unhappy about it. Why, he's jealous on
purpose. He doesn't care,”</span> said Grushenka bitterly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“On purpose?”</span> queried Alyosha.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I tell you you are silly, Alyosha. You know nothing about it,
with all your cleverness. I am not offended that he is jealous of a
girl like me. I would be offended if he were not jealous. I am like
that. I am not offended at jealousy. I have a fierce heart, too. I
can be jealous myself. Only what offends me is that he doesn't love
me at all. I tell you he is jealous now <em class="tei tei-emph"><span style="font-style: italic">on purpose</span></em>. Am I blind?
Don't I see? He began talking to me just now of that woman, of
Katerina, saying she was this and that, how she had ordered a doctor
from Moscow for him, to try and save him; how she had ordered
the best counsel, the most learned one, too. So he loves her, if he'll
praise her to my face, more shame to him! He's treated me badly
himself, so he attacked me, to make out I am in fault first and to
throw it all on me. <span class="tei tei-q">‘You were with your Pole before me, so I can't
be blamed for Katerina,’</span> that's what it amounts to. He wants to
throw the whole blame on me. He attacked me on purpose, on
purpose, I tell you, but I'll—”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Grushenka could not finish saying what she would do. She hid
her eyes in her handkerchief and sobbed violently.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“He doesn't love Katerina Ivanovna,”</span> said Alyosha firmly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Well, whether he loves her or not, I'll soon find out for myself,”</span>
said Grushenka, with a menacing note in her voice, taking the handkerchief
from her eyes. Her face was distorted. Alyosha saw
sorrowfully that from being mild and serene, it had become sullen
and spiteful.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Enough of this foolishness,”</span> she said suddenly; <span class="tei tei-q">“it's not for that
I sent for you. Alyosha, darling, to-morrow—what will happen
to-morrow? That's what worries me! And it's only me it worries!
I look at every one and no one is thinking of it. No one cares about
it. Are you thinking about it even? To-morrow he'll be tried, you
know. Tell me, how will he be tried? You know it's the valet, the
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page640"></span><SPAN name="Pg640" id="Pg640" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
valet killed him! Good heavens! Can they condemn him in place
of the valet and will no one stand up for him? They haven't
troubled the valet at all, have they?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“He's been severely cross-examined,”</span> observed Alyosha thoughtfully;
<span class="tei tei-q">“but every one came to the conclusion it was not he. Now
he is lying very ill. He has been ill ever since that attack. Really
ill,”</span> added Alyosha.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Oh, dear! couldn't you go to that counsel yourself and tell him
the whole thing by yourself? He's been brought from Petersburg
for three thousand roubles, they say.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“We gave these three thousand together—Ivan, Katerina Ivanovna
and I—but she paid two thousand for the doctor from Moscow
herself. The counsel Fetyukovitch would have charged more, but
the case has become known all over Russia; it's talked of in all the
papers and journals. Fetyukovitch agreed to come more for the
glory of the thing, because the case has become so notorious. I saw
him yesterday.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Well? Did you talk to him?”</span> Grushenka put in eagerly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“He listened and said nothing. He told me that he had already
formed his opinion. But he promised to give my words consideration.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Consideration! Ah, they are swindlers! They'll ruin him. And
why did she send for the doctor?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“As an expert. They want to prove that Mitya's mad and committed
the murder when he didn't know what he was doing”</span>;
Alyosha smiled gently; <span class="tei tei-q">“but Mitya won't agree to that.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes; but that would be the truth if he had killed him!”</span> cried
Grushenka. <span class="tei tei-q">“He was mad then, perfectly mad, and that was my
fault, wretch that I am! But, of course, he didn't do it, he didn't
do it! And they are all against him, the whole town. Even Fenya's
evidence went to prove he had done it. And the people at the shop,
and that official, and at the tavern, too, before, people had heard
him say so! They are all, all against him, all crying out against
him.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, there's a fearful accumulation of evidence,”</span> Alyosha observed
grimly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“And Grigory—Grigory Vassilyevitch—sticks to his story that
the door was open, persists that he saw it—there's no shaking him.
I went and talked to him myself. He's rude about it, too.”</span></p>
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page641"></span><SPAN name="Pg641" id="Pg641" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, that's perhaps the strongest evidence against him,”</span> said
Alyosha.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“And as for Mitya's being mad, he certainly seems like it now,”</span>
Grushenka began with a peculiarly anxious and mysterious air.
<span class="tei tei-q">“Do you know, Alyosha, I've been wanting to talk to you about it
for a long time. I go to him every day and simply wonder at him.
Tell me, now, what do you suppose he's always talking about? He
talks and talks and I can make nothing of it. I fancied he was
talking of something intellectual that I couldn't understand in my
foolishness. Only he suddenly began talking to me about a babe—that
is, about some child. <span class="tei tei-q">‘Why is the babe poor?’</span> he said. <span class="tei tei-q">‘It's
for that babe I am going to Siberia now. I am not a murderer, but
I must go to Siberia!’</span> What that meant, what babe, I couldn't
tell for the life of me. Only I cried when he said it, because he
said it so nicely. He cried himself, and I cried, too. He suddenly
kissed me and made the sign of the cross over me. What did it
mean, Alyosha, tell me? What is this babe?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“It must be Rakitin, who's been going to see him lately,”</span> smiled
Alyosha, <span class="tei tei-q">“though ... that's not Rakitin's doing. I didn't see
Mitya yesterday. I'll see him to-day.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“No, it's not Rakitin; it's his brother Ivan Fyodorovitch upsetting
him. It's his going to see him, that's what it is,”</span> Grushenka
began, and suddenly broke off. Alyosha gazed at her in amazement.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Ivan's going? Has he been to see him? Mitya told me himself
that Ivan hasn't been once.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“There ... there! What a girl I am! Blurring things out!”</span>
exclaimed Grushenka, confused and suddenly blushing. <span class="tei tei-q">“Stay,
Alyosha, hush! Since I've said so much I'll tell the whole truth—he's
been to see him twice, the first directly he arrived. He galloped
here from Moscow at once, of course, before I was taken ill; and
the second time was a week ago. He told Mitya not to tell you
about it, under any circumstances; and not to tell any one, in fact.
He came secretly.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Alyosha sat plunged in thought, considering something. The
news evidently impressed him.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Ivan doesn't talk to me of Mitya's case,”</span> he said slowly. <span class="tei tei-q">“He's
said very little to me these last two months. And whenever I go
to see him, he seems vexed at my coming, so I've not been to him
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page642"></span><SPAN name="Pg642" id="Pg642" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
for the last three weeks. H'm!... if he was there a week ago ...
there certainly has been a change in Mitya this week.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“There has been a change,”</span> Grushenka assented quickly. <span class="tei tei-q">“They
have a secret, they have a secret! Mitya told me himself there was
a secret, and such a secret that Mitya can't rest. Before then, he was
cheerful—and, indeed, he is cheerful now—but when he shakes his
head like that, you know, and strides about the room and keeps pulling
at the hair on his right temple with his right hand, I know there
is something on his mind worrying him.... I know! He was
cheerful before, though, indeed, he is cheerful to-day.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“But you said he was worried.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, he is worried and yet cheerful. He keeps on being irritable
for a minute and then cheerful and then irritable again. And you
know, Alyosha, I am constantly wondering at him—with this awful
thing hanging over him, he sometimes laughs at such trifles as
though he were a baby himself.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“And did he really tell you not to tell me about Ivan? Did he
say, <span class="tei tei-q">‘Don't tell him’</span>?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Yes, he told me, <span class="tei tei-q">‘Don't tell him.’</span> It's you that Mitya's most
afraid of. Because it's a secret: he said himself it was a secret.
Alyosha, darling, go to him and find out what their secret is and
come and tell me,”</span> Grushenka besought him with sudden eagerness.
<span class="tei tei-q">“Set my mind at rest that I may know the worst that's in store for
me. That's why I sent for you.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“You think it's something to do with you? If it were, he
wouldn't have told you there was a secret.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I don't know. Perhaps he wants to tell me, but doesn't dare to.
He warns me. There is a secret, he tells me, but he won't tell me
what it is.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“What do you think yourself?”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“What do I think? It's the end for me, that's what I think.
They all three have been plotting my end, for Katerina's in it. It's
all Katerina, it all comes from her. She is this and that, and that
means that I am not. He tells me that beforehand—warns me.
He is planning to throw me over, that's the whole secret. They've
planned it together, the three of them—Mitya, Katerina, and Ivan
Fyodorovitch. Alyosha, I've been wanting to ask you a long time.
A week ago he suddenly told me that Ivan was in love with Katerina,
<span class="tei tei-pb" id="page643"></span><SPAN name="Pg643" id="Pg643" class="tei tei-anchor"></SPAN>
because he often goes to see her. Did he tell me the truth or not?
Tell me, on your conscience, tell me the worst.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“I won't tell you a lie. Ivan is not in love with Katerina Ivanovna,
I think.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“Oh, that's what I thought! He is lying to me, shameless deceiver,
that's what it is! And he was jealous of me just now, so as
to put the blame on me afterwards. He is stupid, he can't disguise
what he is doing; he is so open, you know.... But I'll give it to
him, I'll give it to him! <span class="tei tei-q">‘You believe I did it,’</span> he said. He said
that to me, to me. He reproached me with that! God forgive him!
You wait, I'll make it hot for Katerina at the trial! I'll just say a
word then ... I'll tell everything then!”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
And again she cried bitterly.</p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
<span class="tei tei-q">“This I can tell you for certain, Grushenka,”</span> Alyosha said, getting
up. <span class="tei tei-q">“First, that he loves you, loves you more than any one in the
world, and you only, believe me. I know. I do know. The second
thing is that I don't want to worm his secret out of him, but if
he'll tell me of himself to-day, I shall tell him straight out that I
have promised to tell you. Then I'll come to you to-day, and tell
you. Only ... I fancy ... Katerina Ivanovna has nothing to
do with it, and that the secret is about something else. That's certain.
It isn't likely it's about Katerina Ivanovna, it seems to me.
Good-by for now.”</span></p>
<p class="tei tei-p" style="margin-bottom: 1.00em">
Alyosha shook hands with her. Grushenka was still crying. He
saw that she put little faith in his consolation, but she was better
for having had her sorrow out, for having spoken of it. He was
sorry to leave her in such a state of mind, but he was in haste. He
had a great many things to do still.</p>
</div>
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