College Freshman's Don't Book

<h2>AS TO DRESS</h2> <div class="sidenote">VARSITY AND PREP-SCHOOL FASHIONS</div> <div class="figleft"> <ANTIMG src="images/i_011-drop-d.png" width-obs="152" height-obs="177" alt="D" /></div> <div class='unindent'><br/><br/>ON'T wear your Prep-school hat-band, or flash your High-school Fraternity pin upon your almost manly chest. These are stock idiosyncrasies of the <i>Freshman</i>. Just remember that <i>School</i> fashions do <i>not</i> prevail at <i>College</i>.</div> <div class="sidenote">THE "SPORTY" DRESSER</div> <p><i>Don't</i> dress too "sporty," during the first term. The effects you try to imitate at <i>this</i> period of the game are apt to be only the superficial and amusing ones.</p> <div class="sidenote">A SHORT WORD ABOUT LONG HAIR</div> <p><i>Don't</i> wear <i>long</i> hair. Hair, if left to grow as it listeth, may attain to a surprising length within a single season. The Freshman year is <i>not</i> the time to test<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</SPAN></span> the accuracy of this statement. Wait till you are a Sophomore; then you won't care to. Remember that long hair is the <i>Poet's</i> privilege (though <i>not</i> always <i>proof</i> of a Poet). To wear long hair, you had better take out a Poet's license. In this respect a <i>dog-license</i> will do if you fail to qualify as Poet.</p> <div class="sidenote">WHISKERS AND SUCH</div> <p><i>Don't</i> feel it <i>incumbent</i> upon you to wear a <i>beard</i> or a <i>moustache</i>, if you happen to have raised one on the farm or in England, during the summer. Whiskers are the <i>plus sign</i> of <i>masculinity</i>. Upper-classmen do not appreciate them in Freshmen.</p> <div class="sidenote">ABOUT THOSE SPARKLERS</div> <p><i>Don't</i> wear too much <i>jewelry;</i> as an <i>over-amount</i> of it suggests trips to places where they <i>loan money</i>.</p> <div class="figleft"> <ANTIMG src="images/i_012a.png" width-obs="367" height-obs="600" alt="Young man dressed up in hat, tie, coat, lapel pins, pocket handkerchief, carrying a cane" /> <span class="caption">DONT DRESS TOO SPORTY</span></div> <div class="sidenote">HORSY ORNAMENTS</div> <p><i>Don't</i> affect stick-pins bearing large horses' heads or horseshoes, thinking these will demonstrate that you <i>keep a gig</i>. The horsy ornament connotes the coachman's white tie and the odor of the <i>stable</i>.</p> <div class="sidenote">THAT CANE</div> <p><i>Don't</i> carry a <i>cane</i> in your Freshman year; something is <i>very</i> likely to happen to it.</p> <div class="sidenote">THAT TALL HAT</div> <p><i>Don't</i> be found displaying a <i>tall hat</i>. A tall hat is a mighty nice thing for Sister's wedding <i>at home;</i> but better <i>leave</i> it there. Its dignity is liable to fade, like the glory that was Greece and the grandeur that was Rome. It was only because those nations got <i>too chesty</i>, you remember, that the Vandals of old worried them.</p> <div class="sidenote">CRAZY MEN&mdash;CRAZY CLOTHES</div> <p><i>Don't</i> think that crazy or odd clothes are necessarily "College" clothes. Lots of College men <i>do</i> wear crazy clothes; but it isn't so much because they're College men, as because they're <i>crazy</i>.</p> <div class="sidenote">SANE DRESS</div> <p><i>Don't</i> forget to dress neatly and up to your means. You owe it<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</SPAN><br/><SPAN name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</SPAN></span> to yourself to dress as <i>well</i> as you can. I don't mean that owing this to <i>yourself</i> should necessitate your continually owing something to your <i>tailor</i>. You do not <i>owe</i> it to yourself to <i>owe anybody</i>.</p> <hr class="chap" /><p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</SPAN></span></p> <div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />