<h2>CHAPTER XV<br/> <span class="f8">A PECULIAR DINNER-PARTY</span></h2>
<p class="cap"><span class="upper">We</span> did not stop at Aboyne, but ran on beyond
Kincardine O’Neill, and took our second
rest close to the Bridge of Potarch where we
had tea at the little hotel on the right bank of the river.
Then for a while we leaned over the parapet and looked at
the water flowing swiftly far below as the river narrows
from its pebbly bed to the gorge of rock on which the
bridge rests. There is something soothing, perhaps something
hypnotic, in the ceaseless rush of water. It unconsciously
takes one’s thoughts on and on, till the reality of
the present is in some measure lost and the mind wanders
towards imagination through the regions of the unknown.
As I looked at Marjory, with the afternoon sun falling on
her superb figure and showing up her clear-cut profile
with all the finish of a cameo, I could not but be struck
with the union of gentleness and independence which was
so clearly manifested in her. Without thinking, I spoke
out my mind. It is a privilege of those who understand
each other, or of the very young, to give voice to the
latter portion of a train of thought without feeling it
necessary to enlighten the hearer as to what has gone to
make up the conclusion. The feeling was hourly growing
upon me that, even if I could not quite understand Marjory,
at least she understood me.</p>
<p>“But then all you American girls are so independent!”
She did not seem a bit surprised by this fag end of reasoning;<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[139]</SPAN></span>
she had evidently been following up some train of
thought of her own, and by some happy instinct my
words fitted in with it. Without turning towards me, but
still keeping her eyes fixed down the stream to where far
away it swayed to the right through a gap between pine
clad hills she answered:</p>
<p>“Yes! We are as a rule brought up to be independent.
It seems to be a part of what our people call the ‘genius’
of the country. Indeed for many, women as well as men,
it is a sort of necessity. Our nation is so vast, and it expands
so quickly, that there is nearly everywhere a
family separation. In the main, all the children of one
generation become the heads of families of the next.
Somehow, the bulk of our young people still follow the
sunset; and in the new life which comes to each, whether
in the fields or in the city or in the reclamation of the
wilderness, the one thing which makes life endurable is
this independence which is another form of self-reliance.
This it is which enables them to brave hunger and thirst
and all danger which comes to pioneers; which in the
cities makes the solitude of lonely life bearable to the
young as well as to the old; which makes them work and
study in patience; which makes them self-sacrificing, and
thrifty, and long enduring. I tell you it is this which
makes a race of patriots, whose voices swell in unison till
the great voice of the nation, raised in some good cause,
can ring and echo through the world!” As she spoke she
got more and more earnest, more and more enthusiastic,
till her voice began to vibrate and her face to flush.
When she turned towards me at the end, her eyes were
full of spiritual light. I looked at her, and I suppose my
love as well as my admiration must have expressed itself,
for her eyes fell and the flush on her face melted into a
soft blush. She turned, looked at the water again, and
then went on speaking:</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[140]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>“This is the good side of our independence and <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">faute
de mieux</i> it serves; those who know no better do not
miss what might be. But oh! it has to be paid for. The
little sufferings of day by day can grow into a mass which
in the end outweighs those seemingly far greater ills
which manifest themselves all at once. No one knows,
no one ever will know, how much quiet, dull pain goes to
tame a woman’s heart to the solitude of life. I have not
seen so much of it as some others; my life has been laid in
pleasant places, and only through the small accidents of
life have I come to know of the negative pain which other
girls have to endure. It is so much to have round one the
familiar faces of our youth; to meet sympathy at every
turn of life, and to know that there is understanding for
us always. We women have to give something in order
to be happy. The stronger-minded ones, as we call them,
blame the Creator for this disposition of things—or else I
do not know who or what they blame; but the rest of us,
who are wise enough to accept what cannot be altered,
try to realise what can be done for the best. We all want
to care for some one or something, if it is only a cat or a
dog. For myself, so far back as I can remember, I longed
to have a brother or sister, but I think that in my secret
heart it was a brother I wanted. Of course as I merged
into my actual surroundings I grew out of this; but
once it was brought home to me with new force. We
were staying for a few days in one of those great English
houses where there was a growing family of boys and
girls. There was one sweet young girl, just about my own
age, who seemed idolised by all her brothers. When we
arrived they were all going in to evening prayers. The
last of the sunlight was falling through the old stained
glass window of the great baronial hall, and lit up the
little family group. The girl sat between two of her
young brothers, great stalwart lads who had all the characteristics<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[141]</SPAN></span>
of a family of soldiers. During prayers each
of them held one of her hands; and when they all knelt,
her arms went round their necks. I could not help feeling
deeply—down into the very depths of my soul—how
good it was for them all. I would have given everything
I have, or am ever likely to have, that mine had been
such an upbringing. Think, how in after years it will
come back to those boys in hours of trial, or pain, or prosperity,
or passion; in all times when their manhood or
their honour or their worth is to be tried; how they will
remember the words which were spoken to them as those
were spoken, and were listened to as those were listened to,
in the midst of sympathy and love. Many and many a time
in years to come those boys will bless such hours, and God
Himself will surely rejoice that His will was being
wrought in so sweet a way. And the same thing is going
on in a thousand English homes!” She paused and
turned to me and the feeling in her heart found expression
in the silent tears that ran down her cheeks. Again she
turned her eyes to the running water and gazed awhile
before speaking again. Then looking at me, she went
on:</p>
<p>“And the girl, too, how good it was for her! What
an antidote to selfishness! How much of self-control, of
sympathy, of love, of toleration was begun and fostered
and completed in those moments of the expression of her
heart! What place can there really be for selfish want
and sorrows in the heart of a woman so trained to sympathise
with and help others? It is good! good! good! and
I pray that in the later development of my own dear country,
all such things may have a part. Expansion at its
present rate must soon cease; and then some predominant
idea must take the place of the eternal self-independence.
We shall, I trust, moult no feather of our national feeling
of personal duty; but I am sure that our people, and more<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[142]</SPAN></span>
especially our women, will lead happier as well as healthier
lives.”</p>
<p>This present phase of Marjory’s character was new to
me, fresh and enchanting. Every hour seemed to bring
out new worths and beauties of the girl’s character, of her
intellectual gifts, of the endless wealth of her heart.</p>
<p>When she ceased speaking I took her hand in mine, she
not resenting, and kissed it. I said only one word
“Marjory!” but it was enough. I could see that in her
eyes which made my heart leap.</p>
<p>Then a new life seemed to come to both of us. With
one accord we moved towards our bicycles, and mounted
in silence. After a few minutes of rapid spin down the
sloping road from the bridge, we began to chat again
gaily. For myself I was in wildly joyous spirits. Even
a self-doubting lover could not fail to understand such a
look in his mistress’s eyes. If ever love spoke out in eloquent
silence it was then, all doubt melted from my
heart, as the night shadows pale before the dawn. I was
content to wait now, illimitably and in silence. She,
too, seemed altogether happy, and accepted in unquestioning
faith all the little pleasures which came in the progress
of our journey. And such pleasures are many. As we
drew down the valley of the Dee, with the mountains
falling back and the dark pinewoods running up them
like tongues of flame and emphasising by their gloom
the brightness of grass and heather which cropped up
amongst the rocks beyond, every turn of the road brought
us to some new scene of peaceful beauty. From under
the splendid woods of Crathes Castle we saw the river
running like a blue ribbon far to the east and on either side
of it fields and gardens and woods spreading wide. On
we sped with delight in every moment, till at last through
miles of shady woods we came to the great stone bridge,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</SPAN></span>
and ended our jaunt over the rough granite cobblestones
of Aberdeen.</p>
<p>We were a little before the time the train was due; so
leaving our wheels in the Palace Hotel we went down
on the platform to meet Mrs. Jack on her arrival.</p>
<p>We met her in due course, and brought her up to the
hotel. At the stairway Marjory, who had lingered half a
flight behind her companion, whispered to me:</p>
<p>“You have been a good boy to-day, a real good boy;
and you shall before long have your reward.” As she
gave me her hand, I whispered:</p>
<p>“I am content to wait now Marjory; dear Marjory!”
She blushed and smiled, and fled upstairs with a warning
finger laid upon her lips.</p>
<p>It had been understood that I was to dine with Mrs.
Jack and her friend, so I went up to the room which I had
secured, to change my clothes. When I came down, in
what I thought was a reasonable time, I went to the
private sitting-room and knocked. As there was no answer
I knocked again; then receiving no reply I took it
for granted that the ladies had not yet come from their
rooms and entered.</p>
<p>The room was empty but on the table which was laid for
dinner for three was a note in Marjory’s hand directed to
me. With a sinking of the heart I opened it, and stood for
a few minutes amazed. It had no apostrophe and ran as
follows:—</p>
<div class="blockquot">
<p>“We have had to leave suddenly, but Mrs. Jack wants
you to oblige her very much if you will be so good. Stay
in the room, and when dinner is served sit down by yourself
and eat it. Please, please do not think hardly of
Mrs. Jack’s request; and do not fail to carry it out. There
is good reason for it, as you will very soon know. More<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</SPAN></span>
depends on your doing as Mrs. Jack”—the “Mrs. Jack”
was written over an obliterated “I”—“asks than you
may think. I am sure that by this time you know you
can trust me.</p>
<p class="sign1">
<span>“Marjory.”</span></p>
</div>
<p>The situation was disappointing and both humiliating
and embarrassing. To be a guest under such conditions
was almost ridiculous; and under ordinary circumstances
I should have refused. But then I remembered that last
look of Marjory’s eyes at the bridge of Potarch! Without
a word, or another thought, of revolt I sat down to
the dinner which the waiter was just now bringing into
the room.</p>
<p>As it was evident to me that my staying in the room
was for some purpose of delay, I lingered over my wine
and had two cigars before I came away.</p>
<hr class="l1" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</SPAN></span></p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />