<h2><SPAN name="Chapter_XXXII"></SPAN>Chapter XXXII</h2>
<h3>Listeners never hear any good of themselves.</h3>
<br/>
<p>Vanslyperken was awakened three hours after he had fallen asleep
by the noise of the buckets washing the decks. He heard the men
talking on deck, and aware that no one knew that he was on board,
he rose from his bed, and opened one of the sliding sashes of the
skylight, that he might overhear the conversation. The first words
he heard were from Bill Spurey.</p>
<p>"I say, Coble, I wonder what the skipper will say when he comes
on board, and finds that the dog is gone?"</p>
<p>"Hoh! hoh!" thought Vanslyperken.</p>
<p>"I arn't convinced that he is gone yet," replied Coble.</p>
<p>"Smallbones swears that he's settled, this time," replied
Spurey.</p>
<p>"So he did before," replied Coble.</p>
<p>"Smallbones again," thought Vanslyperken. "I'll--Smallbones him,
if I hang for it."</p>
<p>"Why, he says he buried him two feet deep."</p>
<p>"Ay, ay; but what's the use of burying an animal who's not a
human creature? For my part, I say this, that the imp belongs to
his master, and is bound to serve him as long as his master lives.
When he dies the dog may be killed, and then----"</p>
<p>"Then what?"</p>
<p>"Why, with the blessing of God, they'll both go to hell
together, and I don't care how soon."</p>
<p>"Kill me, you old villain!" muttered Vanslyperken, grinding his
teeth.</p>
<p>"Well, anyhow, if the dog be not made away with, no more be
Smallbones. He ar'n't afeard of the devil himself."</p>
<p>"No, not he; I'm of opinion Smallbones wa'n't sent here for
nothing."</p>
<p>"He's escaped him twice, at all events."</p>
<p>"Then they know it," thought Vanslyperken, turning pale.</p>
<p>"Ay, and I will take you any bet you please, that the skipper
never takes that boy's life. He's charmed, or I am a gudgeon."</p>
<p>Vanslyperken felt that it was his own suspicion, and he trembled
at the idea of the lad being supernatural.</p>
<p>"Out of the way, Coble, or I'll fill your shoes," cried out one
of the men, slashing a bucket of water.</p>
<p>"That's not quite so easy, 'cause I've got boots on," replied
Coble. "However, I'll take up another berth."</p>
<p>The men walked away, and Vanslyperken could hear no more; but he
had heard quite enough. The life of the dog had been attempted by
Smallbones, it was evident. Mr Vanslyperken, after a little
agitation, rang the bell.</p>
<p>"By all that's blue, the skipper's on board!" exclaimed the men
on deck.</p>
<p>"When the devil did he come?"</p>
<p>"Not in my watch, at all events," replied Coble. "Did he come in
yours, Short?"</p>
<p>"No," replied Short.</p>
<p>"Then it must have been in the corporal's."</p>
<p>"The corporal never called me, nor was he 'on deck," replied
Coble. "I've a notion he never kept his watch."</p>
<p>The ring at the bell particularly concerned two people, the two
culprits, Smallbones and Corporal Van Spitter.</p>
<p>The latter made his appearance; but previous to his answering
the bell, Mr Vanslyperken had time to reflect. "So they think my
dog is supernatural," said he; "so much the better. I'll make them
believe it still more." Mr Vanslyperken called the dog, and pointed
to his bed. The dog, who was fond of a warm berth, and but seldom
allowed to get on the bed, immediately jumped up into it when
invited, and Mr Vanslyperken patted him, and covered him up with
the bedclothes. He then drew the curtains of the bed, and waited to
see who would answer the bell. Corporal Van Spitter made his
appearance.</p>
<p>"Corporal, I came on board very late, where have you put the
dog? Bring him into the cabin."</p>
<p>Here the corporal, who was prepared, shook his head, smoothed
down the hair of his forehead, and made a very melancholy face.</p>
<p>"It was all my fault, Mynheer Vanslyperken; yet I do for the
best, but de tog be lost."</p>
<p>"How is that, corporal?"</p>
<p>The corporal then stated that he had taken the precaution to
take the dog on shore, as he was afraid to leave it on board when
he went to the washerwoman's, and that he was not long there, but
while he was, the dog disappeared. He had looked everywhere, but
could not find it.</p>
<p>"You took Smallbones with you?" said Vanslyperken.</p>
<p>"Yes, mynheer, to carry de linen."</p>
<p>"And where was he when you were at the washerwoman's."</p>
<p>"He was here and dere."</p>
<p>"I know that it was he who killed and buried the dog,
corporal."</p>
<p>Corporal Van Spitter started, he thought he was discovered.</p>
<p>"Kilt and perryed, mein Gott!" said the corporal, obliged to say
something.</p>
<p>"Yes, I overheard the men say so on deck, corporal. He must have
taken the opportunity when you were in the house counting the
linen."</p>
<p>Now the corporal had time to recover himself, and he argued that
anything was better than that he should be suspected. Smallbones
was already known to have attempted the life of the dog, so he
would leave the lieutenant in his error.</p>
<p>"Mein Gott' he is von d----d kill-dog feller," observed the
corporal. "I look everywhere, I no find te tog. Den de dog is
dead?"</p>
<p>"Yes," replied Vanslyperken, "but I'll punish the scoundrel,
depend upon it. That will do, corporal; you may go."</p>
<p>As Snarleyyow remained perfectly quiet during this conversation,
we must give Vanslyperken great credit for his manoeuvre. The
corporal went to Smallbones, and repeated what had passed.
Smallbones snapped his fingers.</p>
<p>"He may keel-haul, or hang me, for all I care. The dog is dead.
Never fear, corporal, I won't peach upon you. I'm game, and I'll
die so--if so be I must."</p>
<p>Vanslyperken sent for Smallbones. Smallbones, who was worked up
to the highest state of excitement, came in boldly.</p>
<p>"So, you villain, you've killed my dog, and buried it."</p>
<p>"No, I ar'n't," replied Smallbones. "I knows nothing about your
dog, sir."</p>
<p>"Why, the men on deck said so, you scoundrel, I heard them."</p>
<p>"I don't care what the men say; I never killed your dog,
sir."</p>
<p>"You rascal, I'll have your life!" exclaimed Vanslyperken.</p>
<p>Smallbones grinned diabolically, and Vanslyperken, who
remembered all that the men had said in confirmation of his own
opinion relative to Smallbones, turned pale. Smallbones, on his
part, aware from Corporal Van Spitter, that the lieutenant had such
an idea, immediately took advantage of the signs in the
lieutenant's countenance, and drawled
out,--"That's--not--so--easy!"</p>
<p>Vanslyperken turned away. "You may go now, sir, but depend upon
it you shall feel my vengeance!" and Smallbones quitted the
cabin.</p>
<p>Vanslyperken finished his toilet, and then turned the dog out of
the bed.</p>
<p>He went on deck, and after he had walked a little while, sent
for Corporal Van Spitter to consult as to the best method of
ascertaining what had become of Snarleyyow. Having entered
apparently very earnestly into the corporal's arrangements, who was
to go on shore immediately, he desired the corporal to see his
breakfast got ready in the cabin.</p>
<p>It so happened, that the corporal went into the cabin, followed
by Smallbones; the first object that met his view, was Snarleyyow,
sitting upon the chest, scratching his ragged ear as if nothing had
happened.</p>
<p>"Gott in himmel!" roared the corporal, turning back, and running
out of the cabin, upsetting Smallbones, whom he met in the passage,
and trotting, like an elephant, right over him. Nor was Smallbones
the only one who suffered; two marines and three seamen were
successively floored by the corporal, who, blinded with fear, never
stopped till he ran his head butt against the lining in the
forepeak of the cutter, which, with the timbers of the vessel,
brought him up, not all standing, in one sense of the word, for in
his mad career his head was dashed so violently against them, that
the poor corporal fell down, stunned to insensibility.</p>
<p>In the meantime Smallbones had gained his feet, and was rubbing
his ribs, to ascertain if they were all whole. "Well, I'm sure,"
said he, "if I ar'n't flattened for all the world like a pancake,
with that 'ere corporal's weight. One may as well have a
broad-wheel waggon at once go over one's body; but what could make
him come for to go to run away bellowing in that ere manner? He
must have seen the devil; or, perhaps," thought Smallbones, "that
imp of the devil, Snarleyyow. I'll go and see what it was,
anyhow."</p>
<p>Smallbones, rubbing his abdomen, where the corporal had trod
hardest, walked into the cabin, where he beheld the dog. He stood
with his mouth wide open.</p>
<p>"I defy the devil and all his works," exclaimed he, at last,
"and you be one of his, that's sartain. I fear God, and I honour
the king, and the parish taught me to read the bible. There you be
resurrectioned up again. Well, it's no use, I suppose. Satan, I
defy you, anyhow, but it's very hard that a good Christian should
have to get the breakfast ready, of which you'll eat one half; I
don't see why I'm to wait upon the devil or his imps."</p>
<p>Then Smallbones stopped, and thought a little. "I wonder whether
he bee'd dead, as I thought. Master came on board last night
without no one knowing nothing about it, and he might have brought
the dog with him, if so be he came to again. I won't believe that
he's hal-together not to be made away with, for how come his eye
out? Well, I don't care, I'm a good Christian, and may I be swamped
if I don't try what he's made of yet! First time we cuts up beef,
I'll try and chop your tail, anyhow, that I will, if I am hung for
it."</p>
<p>Smallbones regained his determination. He set about laying the
things for breakfast, and when they were ready he went up to the
quarter-deck, reporting the same to Mr Vanslyperken, who had
expected to see him frightened out of his wits, and concluding his
speech by saying, "If you please, sir, the dog be in the cabin, all
right; I said as how I never kilt your dog, nor buried him
neither."</p>
<p>"The dog in the cabin!" exclaimed Mr Vanslyperken, with apparent
astonishment. "Why, how the devil could he have come there?"</p>
<p>"He cummed off, I suppose, sir, same way as you did, without
nobody knowing nothing about it," drawled out Smallbones, who then
walked away.</p>
<p>In the meantime the corporal had been picked up, and the men
were attempting to recover him. Smallbones went forward to see what
had become of him, and learnt how it was that he was
insensible.</p>
<p>"Well, then," thought Smallbones, "it may have been all the same
with the dog, and I believe there's humbug in it, for if the dog
had made his appearance, as master pretends he did, all of a
sudden, he'd a been more frightened than me."</p>
<p>So reasoned Smallbones, and he reasoned well. In the meantime
the corporal opened his eyes, and gradually returned to his senses,
and then for the first time, the ship's company, who were all down
at their breakfast, demanded of Smallbones the reason of the
corporal's conduct.</p>
<p>"Why," replied Smallbones, "because that 'ere beast, Snarleyyow,
be come back again, all alive, a'ter being dead and buried--he's in
the cabin now--that's all."</p>
<p>"That's all!" exclaimed one. "All!" cried another. "The devil!"
said a third.</p>
<p>"I said as how it would be," said Obadiah Coble--"that dog is no
dog, as sure as I sit here."</p>
<p>The return of the dog certainly had a strong effect upon the
whole of the ship's company. The corporal swore that he was not in
the cabin, and that Mr Vanslyperken had arranged for his going on
shore to look for him, when all of a sudden the dog made his
appearance, no one knew how. Smallbones found himself so much in
the minority, that he said nothing. It was perfect heresy not to
believe that the dog was sent from the lower regions; and as for
any further attempts to destroy it, it was considered as perfect
insanity.</p>
<p>But this renewed attempt on the part of Smallbones, for
Vanslyperken was convinced that an attempt had been made, although
it had not been successful, again excited the feelings of Mr
Vanslyperken against the lad, and he resolved somehow or another to
retaliate. His anger overcame his awe, and he was reckless in his
desire of vengeance. There was not the least suspicion of treachery
on the part of Corporal Van Spitter in the heart of Mr
Vanslyperken, and the corporal played his double part so well, that
if possible he was now higher in favour than ever.</p>
<p>After a day or two, during which Mr Vanslyperken remained on
board, he sent for the corporal, determining to sound him as to
whether he would make any attempts upon Smallbones; for to such a
height had Vanslyperken's enmity arrived, that he now resolved to
part with some of his darling money, to tempt the corporal, rather
than not get rid of the lad. After many hints thrown out, but not
taken by the wily corporal, who was resolved that Vanslyperken
should speak plainly, the deed and the reward of ten guineas were
openly proclaimed, and Vanslyperken waited for the corporal's
reply.</p>
<p>"Mein Gott, Mynheer Vanslyperken! suppose it vas possible, I not
take your money, I do it wid pleasure; but, sir, it not
possible."</p>
<p>"Not possible!" exclaimed Vanslyperken.</p>
<p>"No, mynheer," replied the corporal, "I not tell you all,
tousand tyfel, I not tell you all;" and here the corporal put his
hand to his forehead and was silent, much to Vanslyperken's
amazement. But the fact was, that Corporal Van Spitter was thinking
what he possibly could say. At last, a brilliant thought struck
him--he narrated to the lieutenant how he had seen the ghost of
Smallbones, as he thought, when he was floating about, adrift on
the Zuyder Zee--described with great force his horror at the time
of the appearance of the supernatural object, and tailed on to what
he believed to be true, that which he knew to be false, to wit,
that the apparition had cried out to him, that "<i>he was not to be
hurt by mortal man</i>." "Gott in Himmel," finished the corporal,
"I never was so frightened in my life. I see him now, as plain as I
see you, mynheer. Twenty tousand tyfels, but the voice was like de
tunder--and his eye like de lightning--I fell back in one swoon.
Ah, mein Gott, mein Gott!"</p>
<p>So well did the corporal play his part, that Vanslyperken became
quite terrified; the candle appeared to burn dim, and he dared not
move to snuff it. He could not but credit the corporal, for there
was an earnestness of description, and a vividness of colouring,
which could not have been invented; besides, was not the corporal
his earnest and only friend? "Corporal," said Vanslyperken,
"perhaps you'll like a glass of scheedam; there's some in the
cupboard."</p>
<p>This was very kind of Mr Vanslyperken, but he wanted one
himself, much more than the corporal. The corporal produced the
bottle and the glass, poured it out, made his military salute, and
tossed it off.</p>
<p>"Give me another glass, corporal," said Vanslyperken, in a
tremulous tone. The lieutenant took one, two, three glasses, one
after another, to recover himself.</p>
<p>The corporal had really frightened him. He was convinced that
Smallbones had a charmed life. Did he not float to the Nab buoy and
back again?--did not a pistol ball pass through him without injury?
Vanslyperken shuddered; he took a fresh glass, and then handed the
bottle to the corporal, who helped himself, saluted, and the liquor
again disappeared in a moment.</p>
<p>Dutch courage is proverbial, although a libel upon one of the
bravest of nations. Vanslyperken now felt it, and again he
commenced with the corporal. "What were the words?" inquired
he.</p>
<p>"Dat he was not to be hurt by mortal man, mynheer. I can take
mine piple oath of it," replied the corporal.</p>
<p>"Damnation!" cried Vanslyperken; "but stop--mortal man--perhaps
he may be hurt by woman."</p>
<p>"Dat is quite anoder ting, mynheer."</p>
<p>"He shan't escape if I can help it," retorted Vanslyperken. "I
must think about it." Vanslyperken poured out another glass of
scheedam, and pushed the stone bottle to the corporal, who helped
himself without ceremony. Mr Vanslyperken was now about two-thirds
drunk, for he was not used to such a quantity of spirits.</p>
<p>"Now, if I had only been friends with that--that--hell-fire
Moggy Salisbury," thought Vanslyperken, speaking aloud to
himself.</p>
<p>"Mein Gott, yes, mynheer," replied the corporal.</p>
<p>Vanslyperken took another glass--spilling a great deal on the
table as he poured it out; he then covered his eyes with his hand,
as if in thought. Thereupon the corporal filled without being
asked, and, as he perceived that his superior remained in the same
position, and did not observe him, he helped himself to a second
glass, and then waited till Vanslyperken should speak again; but
the liquor had overpowered him, and he spoke no more.</p>
<p>The corporal, after a few minutes, went up to his superior; he
touched him on the shoulder, saying, "Mynheer," but he obtained no
reply. On the contrary, the slight touch made Mr Vanslyperken fall
forward on the table. He was quite insensible.</p>
<p>So the corporal took him up in his arms, laid him in his bed,
then taking possession of the lieutenant's chair, for he was tired
of standing so long, he set to work to empty the bottle, which,
being large and full at the time that it was produced from the
cupboard, took some time, and before it was accomplished, the
Corporal Van Spitter had fallen fast asleep in the chair. Shortly
afterwards the candle burnt out, and the cabin was in darkness.</p>
<p>It was about three o'clock in the morning when Mr Vanslyperken
began to recover his senses, and as his recollection returned, so
were his ears met with a stupendous roaring and unusual noise. It
was, to his imagination, unearthly, for he had been troubled with
wild dreams about Smallbones, and his appearance to the corporal.
It sounded like thunder, and Mr Vanslyperken thought that he could
plainly make out, "<i>Mortal man! mortal man!</i>" and, at times,
the other words of the supernatural intimation to the corporal. The
mortal man was drawn out in lengthened cadence, and in a manner
truly horrible. Vanslyperken called out, "Mor--tal--man," was the
reply.</p>
<p>Again Vanslyperken almost shrieked in a perspiration of fear.
The sound now ceased; but it was followed up by a noise like the
rattling of glasses, tumbling about of the chairs and table, and
Vanslyperken buried his face under the clothes. Then the door,
which had been shut, was heard by him to slam like thunder; and
then Snarleyyow barked loud and deep. "Oh! God forgive me!" cried
the terrified lieutenant. "Our Father--which art in heaven--save
me--save me!"</p>
<p>Shortly afterwards the corporal made his appearance with a
light, and inquired if Mr Vanslyperken had called. He found him
reeking with perspiration, and half dead with fear. In broken words
he stated how he had been visited, and how the same intimation that
no mortal man could hurt Smallbones had been rung into his
ears.</p>
<p>"It was only one dream, Mynheer Vanslyperken," observed the
corporal.</p>
<p>"No--it was no dream," replied Vanslyperken. "Stay in the cabin,
good corporal."</p>
<p>"Yes, mynheer," replied the corporal, drawing the curtains of
the bed; and then quietly picking up the various articles on the
floor, the table and chairs which had been overturned.</p>
<p>Alas! Fear is the mate of guilt. All this horrid visitation was
simply that Mr Vanslyperken had heard the corporal's tremendous
snoring, as he slept in the chair, and which his imagination had
turned into the words, "Mortal man." The first exclamation of Mr
Vanslyperken had awoke the corporal, who, aware of the impropriety
of his situation, had attempted to retreat; in so doing he had
overturned the table and chairs, with the bottles and glasses upon
them.</p>
<p>Fearful of discovery upon this unexpected noise, he had hastened
out of the cabin, slammed the door, and waked up Snarleyyow; but he
knew, from the exclamations of Vanslyperken, that the lieutenant
was frightened out of his wits; so he very boldly returned with a
candle to ascertain the result of the disturbance, and was
delighted to find that the lieutenant was still under the
delusion.</p>
<p>So soon as he had replaced everything, the corporal took a
chair, and finding that he had fortunately put the cork into the
stone bottle before he fell asleep, and that there was still one or
two glasses in it, he drank them off, and waited patiently for
daylight. By this time Vanslyperken was again asleep and snoring;
so the corporal took away all the broken fragments, put the things
in order, and left the cabin.</p>
<p>When Vanslyperken awoke and rang his bell, Smallbones entered.
Vanslyperken got up, and finding the cabin as it was left the night
before, was more than ever persuaded that he had been
supernaturally visited. Fear made him quite civil to the lad, whose
life he now considered, as the ship's company did that of the
dog's, it was quite useless for him, at least, to attempt, and thus
ends this chapter of horrors.</p>
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