<p>J. BELFORD. <SPAN name="link2H_4_0020" id="link2H_4_0020"></SPAN></p>
<br/>
<h2> LETTER XIX </h2>
<h3> MISS CLARISSA HARLOWE, TO MISS HOWE </h3>
<p>I thank you and Mr. Hickman for his letter, sent me with such kind
expedition; and proceed to obey my dear menacing tyranness.</p>
<p>[She then gives the particulars of what passed between herself and Mr.<br/>
Lovelace on Tuesday morning, in relation to his four friends, and to<br/>
Miss Partington, pretty much to the same effect as in Mr. Lovelace's<br/>
Letter, No. XIII. And then proceeds:]<br/></p>
<p>He is constantly accusing me of over-scrupulousness. He says, 'I am always
out of humour with him: that I could not have behaved more reservedly to
Mr. Solmes: and that it is contrary to all his hopes and notions, that he
should not, in so long a time, find himself able to inspire the person,
whom he hoped so soon to have the honour to call his, with the least
distinguishing tenderness for him before-hand.'</p>
<p>Silly and partial encroacher! not to know to what to attribute the reserve
I am forced to treat him with! But his pride has eaten up his prudence. It
is indeed a dirty low pride, that has swallowed up the true pride which
should have set him above the vanity that has overrun him.</p>
<p>Yet he pretends that he has no pride but in obliging me: and is always
talking of his reverence and humility, and such sort of stuff: but of this
I am sure that he has, as I observed the first time I saw him,* too much
regard to his own person, greatly to value that of his wife, marry he whom
he will: and I must be blind, if I did not see that he is exceedingly vain
of his external advantages, and of that address, which, if it has any
merit in it to an outward eye, is perhaps owing more to his confidence
that [sic] to any thing else.</p>
<p>* See Vol. I. Letter III.</p>
<p>Have you not beheld the man, when I was your happy guest, as he walked to
his chariot, looking about him, as if to observe what eyes his specious
person and air had attracted?</p>
<p>But indeed we had some homely coxcombs as proud as if they had persons to
be proud of; at the same time that it was apparent, that the pains they
took about themselves but the more exposed their defects.</p>
<p>The man who is fond of being thought more or better than he is, as I have
often observed, but provokes a scrutiny into his pretensions; and that
generally produces contempt. For pride, as I believe I have heretofore
said, is an infallible sign of weakness; of something wrong in the head or
in both. He that exalts himself insults his neighbour; who is provoked to
question in him even that merit, which, were he modest, would perhaps be
allowed to be his due.</p>
<p>You will say that I am very grave: and so I am. Mr. Lovelace is extremely
sunk in my opinion since Monday night: nor see I before me any thing that
can afford me a pleasing hope. For what, with a mind so unequal as his,
can be my best hope?</p>
<p>I think I mentioned to you, in my former, that my clothes were brought me.
You fluttered me so, that I am not sure I did. But I know I designed to
mention that they were. They were brought me on Thursday; but neither my
few guineas with them, nor any of my books, except a Drexelius on
Eternity, the good old Practice of Piety, and a Francis Spira. My
brother's wit, I suppose. He thinks he does well to point out death and
despair to me. I wish for the one, and every now-and-then am on the brink
of the other.</p>
<p>You will the less wonder at my being so very solemn, when, added to the
above, and to my uncertain situation, I tell you, that they have sent me
with these books a letter form my cousin Morden. It has set my heart
against Mr. Lovelace. Against myself too. I send it enclosed. If you
please, my dear, you may read it here:</p>
<p>COL. MORDEN, TO MISS CLARISSA HARLOWE</p>
<p>Florence, April 13.</p>
<p>I am extremely concerned to hear of a difference betwixt the rest of a
family so near and dear to me, and you still dearer to than any of the
rest.</p>
<p>My cousin James has acquainted me with the offers you have had, and with
your refusals. I wonder not at either. Such charming promises at so early
an age as when I left England; and those promises, as I have often heard,
so greatly exceeded, as well in your person as mind; how much must you be
admired! how few must there be worthy of you!</p>
<p>Your parents, the most indulgent in the world, to a child the most
deserving, have given way it seems to your refusal of several gentlemen.
They have contented themselves at last to name one with earnestness to
you, because of the address of another whom they cannot approve.</p>
<p>They had not reason, it seems, from your behaviour, to think you greatly
averse: so they proceeded: perhaps too hastily for a delicacy like your's.
But when all was fixed on their parts, and most extraordinary terms
concluded in your favour; terms, which abundantly show the gentleman's
just value for you; you flew off with a warmth and vehemence little suited
to that sweetness which gave grace to all your actions.</p>
<p>I know very little of either of the gentlemen: but of Mr. Lovelace I know
more than of Mr. Solmes. I wish I could say more to his advantage than I
can. As to every qualification but one, your brother owns there is no
comparison. But that one outweighs all the rest together. It cannot be
thought that Miss Clarissa Harlowe will dispense with MORALS in a husband.</p>
<p>What, my dearest cousin, shall I plead first to you on this occasion? Your
duty, your interest, your temporal and your eternal welfare, do, and may
all, depend upon this single point, the morality of a husband. A woman who
hath a wicked husband may find it difficult to be good, and out of her
power to do good; and is therefore in a worse situation than the man can
be in, who hath a bad wife. You preserve all your religious regards, I
understand. I wonder not that you do. I should have wondered had you not.
But what can you promise youself, as to perseverance in them, with an
immoral husband?</p>
<p>If your parents and you differ in sentiment on this important occasion,
let me ask you, my dear cousin, who ought to give way? I own to you, that
I should have thought there could not any where have been a more suitable
match for you than Mr. Lovelace, had he been a moral man. I should have
very little to say against a man, of whose actions I am not to set up
myself as a judge, did he not address my cousin. But, on this occasion,
let me tell you, my dear Clarissa, that Mr. Lovelace cannot possibly
deserve you. He may reform, you'll say: but he may not. Habit is not soon
or easily shaken off. Libertines, who are libertines in defiance of
talents, of superior lights, of conviction, hardly ever reform but by
miracle, or by incapacity. Well do I know mine own sex. Well am I able to
judge of the probability of the reformation of a licentious young man, who
has not been fastened upon by sickness, by affliction, by calamity: who
has a prosperous run of fortune before him: his spirits high: his will
uncontroulable: the company he keeps, perhaps such as himself, confirming
him in all his courses, assisting him in all his enterprises.</p>
<p>As to the other gentleman, suppose, my dear cousin, you do not like him at
present, it is far from being unlikely that you will hereafter: perhaps
the more for not liking him now. He can hardly sink lower in your opinion:
he may rise. Very seldom is it that high expectations are so much as
tolerably answered. How indeed can they, when a fine and extensive
imagination carries its expectation infinitely beyond reality, in the
highest of our sublunary enjoyments? A woman adorned with such an
imagination sees no defect in a favoured object, (the less, if she be not
conscious of any wilful fault in herself,) till it is too late to rectify
the mistakes occasioned by her generous credulity.</p>
<p>But suppose a person of your talents were to marry a man of inferior
talents; Who, in this case, can be so happy in herself as Miss Clarissa
Harlowe? What delight do you take in doing good! How happily do you devote
the several portions of the day to your own improvement, and to the
advantage of all that move within your sphere!—And then, such is
your taste, such are your acquirements in the politer studies, and in the
politer amusements; such your excellence in all the different parts of
economy fit for a young lady's inspection and practice, that your friends
would wish you to be taken off as little as possible by regards that may
be called merely personal.</p>
<p>But as to what may be the consequence respecting yourself, respecting a
young lady of your talents, from the preference you are suspected to give
to a libertine, I would have you, my dear cousin, consider what that may
be. A mind so pure, to mingle with a mind impure! And will not such a man
as this engross all your solitudes? Will he not perpetually fill you with
anxieties for him and for yourself?—The divine and civil powers
defied, and their sanctions broken through by him, on every not merely
accidental but meditated occasion. To be agreeable to him, and to hope to
preserve an interest in his affections, you must probably be obliged to
abandon all your own laudable pursuits. You must enter into his pleasures
and distastes. You must give up your virtuous companions for his
profligate ones—perhaps be forsaken by your's, because of the
scandal he daily gives. Can you hope, cousin, with such a man as this to
be long so good as you now are? If not, consider which of your present
laudable delights you would choose to give up! which of his culpable ones
to follow him in! How could you brook to go backward, instead of forward,
in those duties which you now so exemplarily perform? and how do you know,
if you once give way, where you shall be suffered, where you shall be
able, to stop?</p>
<p>Your brother acknowledges that Mr. Solmes is not near so agreeable in
person as Mr. Lovelace. But what is person with such a lady as I have the
honour to be now writing to? He owns likewise that he has not the address
of Mr. Lovelace: but what a mere personal advantage is a plausible
address, without morals? A woman had better take a husband whose manners
she were to fashion, than to find them ready-fashioned to her hand, at the
price of her morality; a price that is often paid for travelling
accomplishments. O my dear cousin, were you but with us here at Florence,
or at Rome, or at Paris, (where also I resided for many months,) to see
the gentlemen whose supposed rough English manners at setting out are to
be polished, and what their improvement are in their return through the
same places, you would infinitely prefer the man in his first stage to the
same man in his last. You find the difference on their return—a
fondness for foreign fashions, an attachment to foreign vices, a
supercilious contempt of his own country and countrymen; (himself more
despicable than the most despicable of those he despises;) these, with an
unblushing effrontery, are too generally the attainments that concur to
finish the travelled gentleman!</p>
<p>Mr. Lovelace, I know, deserves to have an exception made in his favour;
for he really is a man of parts and learning: he was esteemed so both here
and at Rome; and a fine person, and a generous turn of mind, gave him
great advantages. But you need not be told that a libertine man of sense
does infinitely more mischief than a libertine of weak parts is able to
do. And this I will tell you further, that it was Mr. Lovelace's own fault
that he was not still more respected than he was among the literati here.
There were, in short, some liberties in which he indulged himself, that
endangered his person and his liberty; and made the best and most worthy
of those who honoured him with their notice give him up, and his stay both
at Florence and at Rome shorter than he designed.</p>
<p>This is all I choose to say of Mr. Lovelace. I had much rather have had
reason to give him a quite contrary character. But as to rakes or
libertines in general, I, who know them well, must be allowed, because of
the mischiefs they have always in their hearts, and too often in their
power, to do your sex, to add still a few more words upon this topic.</p>
<p>A libertine, my dear cousin, a plotting, an intriguing libertine, must be
generally remorseless—unjust he must always be. The noble rule of
doing to others what he would have done to himself is the first rule he
breaks; and every day he breaks it; the oftener, the greater his triumph.
He has great contempt for your sex. He believes no woman chaste, because
he is a profligate. Every woman who favours him confirms him in his wicked
incredulity. He is always plotting to extend the mischiefs he delights in.
If a woman loves such a man, how can she bear the thought of dividing her
interest in his affections with half the town, and that perhaps the dregs
of it? Then so sensual!—How will a young lady of your delicacy bear
with so sensual a man? a man who makes a jest of his vows? and who perhaps
will break your spirit by the most unmanly insults. To be a libertine, is
to continue to be every thing vile and inhuman. Prayers, tears, and the
most abject submission, are but fuel to his pride: wagering perhaps with
lewd companions, and, not improbably, with lewder women, upon instances
which he boasts of to them of your patient sufferings, and broken spirit,
and bringing them home to witness both.</p>
<p>I write what I know has been.</p>
<p>I mention not fortunes squandered, estates mortgaged or sold, and
posterity robbed—nor yet a multitude of other evils, too gross, too
shocking, to be mentioned to a person of your delicacy.</p>
<p>All these, my dear cousin, to be shunned, all the evils I have named to be
avoided; the power of doing all the good you have been accustomed to,
preserved, nay, increased, by the separate provision that will be made for
you: your charming diversions, and exemplary employments, all maintained;
and every good habit perpetuated: and all by one sacrifice, the fading
pleasure of the eye! who would not, (since every thing is not to be met
with in one man, who would not,) to preserve so many essentials, give up
to light, so unpermanent a pleasure!</p>
<p>Weigh all these things, which I might insist upon to more advantage, did I
think it needful to one of your prudence—weigh them well, my beloved
cousin; and if it be not the will of your parents that you should continue
single, resolve to oblige them; and let it not be said that the powers of
fancy shall (as in many others of your sex) be too hard for your duty and
your prudence. The less agreeable the man, the more obliging the
compliance. Remember, that he is a sober man—a man who has
reputation to lose, and whose reputation therefore is a security for his
good behaviour to you.</p>
<p>You have an opportunity offered you to give the highest instance that can
be given of filial duty. Embrace it. It is worthy of you. It is expected
from you; however, for your inclination-sake, we may be sorry that you are
called upon to give it. Let it be said that you have been able to lay an
obligation upon your parents, (a proud word, my cousin!) which you could
not do, were it not laid against your inclination!—upon parents who
have laid a thousand upon you: who are set upon this point: who will not
give it up: who have given up many points to you, even of this very
nature: and in their turn, for the sake of their own authority, as well as
judgment, expect to be obliged.</p>
<p>I hope I shall soon, in person, congratulate you upon this your
meritorious compliance. To settle and give up my trusteeship is one of the
principal motives of my leaving these parts. I shall be glad to settle it
to every one's satisfaction; to yours particularly.</p>
<p>If on my arrival I find a happy union, as formerly, reign in a family so
dear to me, it will be an unspeakable pleasure to me; and I shall perhaps
so dispose my affairs, as to be near you for ever.</p>
<p>I have written a very long letter, and will add no more, than that I am,
with the greatest respect, my dearest cousin,</p>
<p>Your most affectionate and faithful servant, WM. MORDEN.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>I will suppose, my dear Miss Howe, that you have read my cousin's letter.
It is now in vain to wish it had come sooner. But if it had, I might
perhaps have been so rash as to give Mr. Lovelace the fatal meeting, as I
little thought of going away with him.</p>
<p>But I should hardly have given him the expectation of so doing, previous
to the meeting, which made him come prepared; and the revocation of which
he so artfully made ineffectual.</p>
<p>Persecuted as I was, and little expecting so much condescension, as my
aunt, to my great mortification, has told me (and you confirm) I should
have met with, it is, however, hard to say what I should or should not
have done as to meeting him, had it come in time: but this effect I verily
believe it would have had—to have made me insist with all my might
on going over, out of all their ways, to the kind writer of the
instructive letter, and on making a father (a protector, as well as a
friend) of a kinsman, who is one of my trustees. This, circumstanced as I
was, would have been a natural, at least an unexceptionable protection!
—But I was to be unhappy! and how it cuts me to the heart to think,
that I can already subscribe to my cousin's character of a libertine, so
well drawn in the letter which I suppose you now to have read!</p>
<p>That a man of a character which ever was my abhorrence should fall to my
lot!—But, depending on my own strength; having no reason to
apprehend danger from headstrong and disgraceful impulses; I too little
perhaps cast up my eyes to the Supreme Director: in whom, mistrusting
myself, I ought to have placed my whole confidence—and the more,
when I saw myself so perserveringly addressed by a man of this character.</p>
<p>Inexperience and presumption, with the help of a brother and sister who
have low ends to answer in my disgrace, have been my ruin!—A hard
word, my dear! but I repeat it upon deliberation: since, let the best
happen which now can happen, my reputation is destroyed; a rake is my
portion: and what that portion is my cousin Morden's letter has acquainted
you.</p>
<p>Pray keep it by you till called for. I saw it not myself (having not the
heart to inspect my trunks) till this morning. I would not for the world
this man should see it; because it might occasion mischief between the
most violent spirit, and the most settled brave one in the world, as my
cousin's is said to be.</p>
<p>This letter was enclosed (opened) in a blank cover. Scorn and detest me as
they will, I wonder that one line was not sent with it—were it but
to have more particularly pointed the design of it, in the same generous
spirit that sent me the spira.</p>
<p>The sealing of the cover was with black wax. I hope there is no new
occasion in the family to give reason for black wax. But if there were, it
would, to be sure, have been mentioned, and laid at my door—perhaps
too justly!</p>
<p>I had begun a letter to my cousin; but laid it by, because of the
uncertainty of my situation, and expecting every day for several days past
to be at a greater certainty. You bid me write to him some time ago, you
know. Then it was I began it: for I have great pleasure in obeying you in
all I may. So I ought to have; for you are the only friend left me. And,
moreover, you generally honour me with your own observance of the advice I
take the liberty to offer you: for I pretend to say, I give better advice
than I have taken. And so I had need. For, I know not how it comes about,
but I am, in my own opinion, a poor lost creature: and yet cannot charge
myself with one criminal or faulty inclination. Do you know, my dear, how
this can be?</p>
<p>Yet I can tell you how, I believe—one devious step at setting out!—
that must be it:—which pursued, has led me so far out of my path,
that I am in a wilderness of doubt and error; and never, never, shall find
my way out of it: for, although but one pace awry at first, it has led me
hundreds and hundreds of miles out of my path: and the poor estray has not
one kind friend, nor has met with one direct passenger, to help her to
recover it.</p>
<p>But I, presumptuous creature! must rely so much upon my own knowledge of
the right path!—little apprehending that an ignus fatuus with its
false fires (and ye I had heard enough of such) would arise to mislead me!
And now, in the midst of fens and quagmires, it plays around me, and
around me, throwing me back again, whenever I think myself in the right
track. But there is one common point, in which all shall meet, err widely
as they may. In that I shall be laid quietly down at last: and then will
all my calamities be at an end.</p>
<p>But how I stray again; stray from my intention! I would only have said,
that I had begun a letter to my cousin Morden some time ago: but that now
I can never end it. You will believe I cannot: for how shall I tell him
that all his compliments are misbestowed? that all his advice is thrown
away? all his warnings vain? and that even my highest expectation is to be
the wife of that free-liver, whom he so pathetically warns me to shun?</p>
<p>Let me own, however, have your prayers joined with my own, (my fate
depending, as it seems, upon the lips of such a man) 'that, whatever shall
be my destiny, that dreadful part of my father's malediction, that I may
be punished by the man in whom he supposes I put my confidence, may not
take place! that this for Mr. Lovelace's own sake, and for the sake of
human nature, may not be! or, if it be necessary, in support of the
parental authority, that I should be punished by him, that it may not be
by his premeditated or wilful baseness; but that I may be able to acquit
his intention, if not his action!' Otherwise, my fault will appear to be
doubled in the eye of the event-judging world. And yet, methinks, I would
be glad that the unkindness of my father and uncles, whose hearts have
already been too much wounded by my error, may be justified in every
article, excepting in this heavy curse: and that my father will be pleased
to withdraw that before it be generally known: at least the most dreadful
part of it which regards futurity!</p>
<p>I must lay down my pen. I must brood over these reflections. Once more,
before I close my cousin's letter, I will peruse it. And then I shall have
it by heart.</p>
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