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<h2>IX</h2> MAKING HIS WILL It was long before the cousins met; Roy's delicate constitution had received such a shock that his condition for some time was a cause of grave anxiety. His leg did not heal, and then the terrible word was whispered through the house "amputation"! It was a lovely evening in September when after a long talk with the doctor in the library Miss Bertram came out, her usually determined face quivering with emotion. "I will tell him to-night, Doctor Grant, and we shall be ready for you to-morrow afternoon at three." She went upstairs, and Dudley with scared eyes having heard her speech now crept out of the house after the doctor. "Look here, Doctor Grant," he said, confronting him with an almost defiant air: "you're not going to make Roy a cripple!" "I'm going to save his life, if I can," said the doctor, half sadly, as he looked down upon the sturdy boy in front of him. "He won't live with only one leg, I know he won't, it will be too much of a disgrace to him; he'll die of grief, I know he will! Oh, Doctor Grant, you might have pity on him, it isn't fair!" "Would you rather see him die in lingering pain?" enquired the doctor, gravely. "Oh, I think it so awful! Why should he be the one to be smashed up. Look at me! I know everybody thinks it a pity it wasn't me. It would have made us so much more equal. Why should I be so strong, and he so weak! I tell you what! I've heard a story about joining on other men's legs. Now tell me, could you do it? Could you give him one of mine? I'd let you cut it off this minute—to-night, if you only would. If it would make him walk straight!" Dudley seized hold of the doctor's coat excitedly, and Doctor Grant saw his whole soul was in his words. "I'm afraid that would be an impossible feat, my boy. No—keep your own legs to wait upon him, and cheer him up all you can." "Cheer him up!" was the fierce retort; "what could cheer him! I know he won't be able to live a cripple. He always says he is straight and upright though his chest is weak, and now when he knows it's no use trying to be strong any more, for he'll never be able to—when he knows he won't be able to play cricket, or football, or even climb the wall or run races—oh, it's awful—it will break his heart, and I wish I was dead!" After which passionate speech Dudley dashed away, and the doctor continued his walk shaking his head and muttering, "It's a bad lookout for the little fellow!" Dudley ran across the lawn in his misery, and then nearly tumbled over Rob who was lying on the grass, his face hidden in his arms. He looked up and his eyes were red and swollen. "Master Dudley, is it true, is he going to lose his legs?" Dudley stood looking at him for a minute before he spoke, and then he said, "Yes, it's all that hateful doctor!" Rob dropped his head on his arms again and a smothered groan escaped him. Dudley continued his run out into the stableyard, from thence to the road, and he never stopped till he reached old Principle's little three-cornered shop. Old Principle was busy serving customers when he came in; he gave him a friendly nod, and went on with his business whilst Dudley crept into the little back parlor, and sitting down in an old horsehair chair tried to recover his breath. It was not long before old Principle came after him. "Well, my laddie," he said, laying his hand on the curly head, "there's sad news going through the village this morning, and I see by your face that 'tis true!" Dudley nodded and then seizing hold of the old man's hand, leaned his head against it and burst into tears. "Why does God do it!" he sobbed at length, "Roy is so much better than I am, he's always trying to please God, though he never talks about it, and I've prayed so hard that he might be made quite well!" "Ay, and the good Lord is making him well perhaps though not by the way you planned. He might a been killed outright, and then what a trouble you'd have been in." "This is nearly as bad," muttered Dudley. "Now, laddie, don't harden your heart, are you one of the Lord's own children?" "I don't know. I don't think I love God as much as Roy does." "'Tis an awful bad principle," the old man continued, "to doubt and complain directly we can't understand the Almighty's dealings with us. He loves Master Roy better'n you and me, and the time will come when we'll thank the Lord with all our hearts for this accident." This was utterly incomprehensible to Dudley. "I feel very badly about it," old Principle went on, "and so do you, but the one I'm most sorry for is Ben Burkstone. I hear say he's fit to kill himself with despair!" "Well," said Dudley, stopping his sobs for a minute; "I don't see it was his fault; it was the stupid pony; he funked it, and then fell and broke his knees; mine went over all right. Oh, why didn't it happen to me! If I had been spilled, I wouldn't have minded, and one leg wouldn't have been half so bad to me as to Roy!" "I reckon you'd have got your leg all right again without having to lose it. 'Tis the laddie's delicate constitution that is so in his way. But I think you'll find Master Roy as plucky over the loss of his leg as he ever was. Now lift your heart up to God and ask Him that he may overrule it all for good. There goes the shop-bell!" Old Principle disappeared, and Dudley soothed and comforted by his sympathy, retraced his steps to the house. Meanwhile Miss Bertram had been going through the trying ordeal of breaking the news to the little invalid. Roy was lying in bed, flushed and restless. His eyes looked unnaturally large and bright, as he met his aunt's anxious gaze. "I'm so tired of pain, Aunt Judy, and I can't get to sleep." Miss Bertram sat down and smiled her brightest smile. Taking his thin little hand in hers she said tenderly, "Yes, dear, you've been a brave little patient, but I hope you won't have much more to bear. You would like to be free from it, wouldn't you?" "Am I going to die?" "We hope you're going to get quite well again, if God wills, and if you will be a good boy and let the doctor cure you." Roy's eyes were fixed intently on his aunt now. "How are they going to cure me?" Then Miss Bertram nerved herself for the occasion. "Roy, dear, you have been so patient since you lay here, that I know you will be patient over this. Doctor Grant says that your leg will never heal as it is, but he is sure you will get well and strong again if—if you will make up your mind to do without it." "Does that mean he is going to cut it off?" "Yes." Dead silence, broken only by the flapping of the window-curtains in the breeze. Roy was not looking at his aunt now, but his eyes were fixed on the distant hills through the open window. A blackbird now hovering on some jasmine outside, suddenly lifted up his voice and burst into an exultant song. A faint smile flickered about Roy's lips. "Do legs never grow again like teeth?" The pathos of tone saved Miss Bertram from smiling at the comicality of the question. "I'm afraid not, dear. Not until we reach heaven." Then there was silence again, broken at last by Roy's saying in a very quiet tone,— "I want to see Dudley." Miss Bertram rose from her seat, but first she stooped to kiss him. "You are quite a little hero," she said; "I will send David to you. My poor little Jonathan!" A hot tear splashed on Roy's forehead; he put up his hand and stroked his aunt's face. "Never mind, Aunt Judy, David made a better king than Jonathan would have I expect. Don't call Dudley just yet—I—I want to be alone." Miss Bertram left him, but sat down outside his door on a broad window ledge and cried like a child. And then a short time after, Dudley stole softly into the room and Roy's arms were clinging round his neck. "Oh, Dudley, I've wanted you, kiss me!" "You're going to get well, old chap, aren't you? You'll soon be out in the garden again." Dudley was speaking in the gruff quick tones he used when trying to hide his feelings. "We'll talk about that presently," said Roy, lying back on his pillows and making Dudley take a seat on his bed. "Dudley, do you know what a will is?" "Yes; you've a strong will nurse always says." "No, not that kind of one. Uncle James left a will when he died saying he left Norrington Court to father, and father left it to me. It's a piece of thick paper they write it down on, and it has some sealing wax on it. Aunt Judy showed me father's will once." Dudley did not look enlightened, so Roy went on,— "I want you to get a piece of paper and write down my will for me. I will tell you what to say." Dudley slipped out of the room obediently and returned with a sheet of note paper, but this did not satisfy Roy. "It must be a large sheet—very large," was his command. After some minutes' search Dudley came in with a sheet of foolscap, and then with pen and ink he began to write at Roy's dictation: "When I am dead"— But Dudley's pen stopped. "You are not going to die, Roy?" "I hope I am," was the unexpected reply; "I've been asking God to make me. I shouldn't think many people lived after their legs were cut off: I know I don't want to!" "But I want you to live," cried poor Dudley; "oh! Roy you couldn't be so mean as to leave me all alone. Oh, do unsay that prayer of yours. You mustn't die!" "I'm going to get quite ready to die," persisted Roy; "and if you really loved me you wouldn't think of liking to see me alive hopping about on a wooden leg, I couldn't do it." "Nelson lived with only one arm," said Dudley. Roy lay back on his pillows to consider this; then he said in a tired voice: "Will you write what I want?" Dudley seized the pen and in round, childish hand wrote as follows: "When I am dead, Dudley is to have Norrington Court for his very own, and he is to live there instead of me. He can have Dibble and Nibble too. Rob is to have my musical box. I leave him my best tool box, and father's red silk pocket-handkerchief which I keep in the old tobacco pot on my chimneypiece. I leave granny her sovereign which she gave me, and my book 'Heroes of old England.' Aunt Judy is to have my best four-bladed knife, and my prayer book. I want old Principle to have my silver mug and my new writing case. I leave nurse the sovereign my guardian gave me to get herself some new shoes, and I leave her my Bible." Thus far; then Roy gave a tired sigh. Dudley having entered completely into the spirit of the thing looked up and said eagerly, "There's your telescope, you know, Roy! If you leave it to me, I'll let you look through it when we're off on our travels." "I shall never travel with no legs—besides I shall be dead. I'll leave my telescope to you." Dudley subsided at once; then after a silence he asked meekly, "Is that enough?" "Yes, I'm so tired, put—'I leave all my old clothes to the village boys, and my cricket bat and stumps to Ben'—but wait a minute, Dudley—there are all the servants, and I've got such heaps of books and toys—I think we'll leave it like that." Dudley looked at his paper with some pride. "I've only made six mistakes and three blots," he said; "now may I drop the sealing wax over it? I've got a lovely red piece in my pocket." "I think I have to write my name at the bottom first, I know father did. Give me the pen." Dudley handed it, and wondered why Roy's fingers shook so as he signed his name. "Is that all?" "No, wait a moment. I want to write something myself." And then in a large scrawl at the bottom of the paper Roy wrote— "This boy died before he had time to serve the Queen, he tried to serve God, and he tried to do good to some people, only they turned out mistakes. He hopes the Queen will forgive him; he knows God will. Amen." Dudley read this with awe. "And is that a will?" he asked. "Yes, let me drop some sealing wax; fetch a candle!" Dudley was longing to do this part himself, but he generously said nothing, and presented Roy with a brass button out of his pocket, to stamp on the hot wax. A lot of sealing wax was dropped indiscriminately all over the paper, and then old nurse appeared on the scene to order Dudley off. "You've been far too long with him already, to my mind," she said; "if Miss Bertram wasn't beside herself she would never have given you permission at all; he ought to have been kept extra quiet, and he's worked himself all in a fever again." She put Roy gently back on his pillows, and did not notice in her short-sightedness the roll of paper being stuffed under his pillow. Dudley's spirits sank to zero, now he was about to be dismissed. "Good-bye, Roy, ask to see me again, won't you?" Roy held out his hand. "I'll talk about it to-morrow," he said, faintly. And Dudley crept out of the room feeling more forlorn and wretched than ever. <hr style="width: 65%;"> <div style="break-after:column;"></div>

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